My brother suffered a setback at the end of the term, and my sister ate KFC and injured two children
The younger brother failed the final exam and saw the sister with a perfect score eating KFC, and the parents either hurt the two children.
Nowadays, it is often said that the impact on others may be minimal, but the insult is extremely serious!Or put it the other way around.
There are many situations in which the above statement applies as a child grows. These situations may seem harmless on the surface and do not seem to cause substantial harm, but in fact they plant the seeds of problems in the child's heart. Whether at school or at home, we need to pay attention to the softer parts of our children's hearts and identify triggers and potential harm that can be counterproductive.
On January 20, a thought-provoking scene unfolded at KFC restaurants in Xi'an.
A little girl is sitting in the dining room eating a hamburger, very happy, but a little boy is looking at her expectantly outside the window. After all, they are brothers, and everything was deliberately arranged by their father, because the final exam scores of the two brothers are very different. In the sixth grade, my younger brother scored 83 and 88 in Chinese and 88 in mathematics, but only 76 in EnglishAnd the older sister in kindergarten got a perfect score of 100.
According to the father of the two children, every year before the final exams, his son always made a wish: as long as he got a certain score, his father would help him fulfill his wish. This time, the condition was to score 80 in every subject, but apparently the English subject was not up to the mark.
Therefore, the child's father refused the request to go to KFC with his son. However, a child is a child, and he couldn't help but talk about it at home. So, the father decided to take his two children to a KFC restaurant with him.
When they arrived at the restaurant, the father ordered food for the two children. However, in order to punish the son, the father did not let him eat directly, but asked him to wait outside, watched his sister eat first, and thought for a while before eating with his sister.
And so, the scene described in the previous article happened. From the boy's eyes, we can see the desire to eat, but also feel the emotions of envy, jealousy, and hatred. In the same **, the two children showed completely different expressions, which attracted the attention of many netizens.
Some netizens believe that the father's approach is obviously inappropriate. The test scores of the two children are not comparable, and the elder brother is already in the sixth grade, so it is normal for the grades to be slightly lower;And my daughter is only in kindergarten, and a full score in the exam seems to be more of a reward and encouragement.
It has also been argued that each child has unique gifts, so parents should take an individualized approach rather than rejecting them because of their performance on a particular test. One comment, which was liked by a lot of people, said that the father's actions were not overtly insulting, but they caused quite serious harm. Other netizens bluntly pointed out that the father's approach was very inappropriate, and if it continued, the younger brother would most likely resent his sister.
In my opinion, this netizen's concern is justified. The father's actions can cause all kinds of harm:
Older siblings may be mired in long-term doubt and guilt for failing to achieve their goals.
From the teacher's point of view, it is normal for a sixth-grader to score above 90 in Chinese, Mathematics and English, but his younger brother's grades are relatively average. This shows that his brother's grades are not determined by a single exam, and his parents should be well aware of this fact.
There's nothing wrong with setting goals for your child before exams, but it's best not to tie goals to interests. If the child succeeds in achieving the goal, it is certainly worth rejoicing. However, if the goal is not achieved, it will cause frustration in the child, and coupled with the blame of the parents, it will lead to a depressed mood in the child with poor psychological capacity. For more rebellious children, the consequences can be even more severe.
The older brother can change his attitude towards his younger sister. Since her sister is still in kindergarten, it is relatively easy for her to get a perfect score and she does not need to put in as much effort as her brother. If parents judge both children by the same standards, older siblings may find it unfair.
In my brother's opinion, scoring 76 points in the exam this time is already very good, and it is a great improvement from last semester. In contrast, the younger sister is easily praised by her father. In the face of a strong father, the elder brother feels powerless and is likely to vent his frustration on his sister, which will undoubtedly ruin the relationship between the brother and sister.
Therefore, it is really inappropriate for my brother to see his sister tasting KFC alone. I think this can be adjusted by differentiating between food groups, for example, children with good grades can have three options, and children with lower grades can have two choices. Or communicate directly with your child to make him understand that this is an additional reward that, although not up to the mark, is an improvement over the previous reward. What's more, there is no need for a direct comparison between two children in different grades.
Despite the father's good intentions, caution must be exercised when adopting similar methods of education. If this method is indeed adopted, it must be weighed and chosen according to the actual personality of the child, otherwise it may hurt both children at the same time.
Are we in favor of this kind of education?