When there is something on your mind, talking is the best way to vent.
Find the best way to deal with the difficult situations in someone else's life and find the best way to bring emotional calm.
It's just that if you say the right person, you'll do more with less.
If you hurt your heart and give it to the wrong person, you will only make yourself a laughing stock for others.
Complaining is never the best way to solve life's difficulties, and really smart people will understand that burying it in their own solutions is the best way, and complaining is likely to make the already bad things worse.
Complaining can only elicit unhelpful sympathy.
Writer Mark Twain said:
Really, it is said that there is the power of empathy between people, but there has never been real empathy in this world, and a person's inner contradictions and pain can only be experienced by themselves, and no matter how intimate the relationship is, it can only be understood and cannot be deeply touched.
If the listener does not have the correct three views, giving the listener an inappropriate method may lead to greater trouble.
As one reader told me, my boyfriend and I have been in love for many years, and I don't know how to solve the relationship crisis, so I chose to listen to my girlfriend and break up.
Now everyone has become a family, but the reader has always regretted it, because she has been living with her ex-boyfriend in her heart, and feels that her friend's advice has ruined her life happiness, and she understands it too late, and everything is irreparable.
Words should be said to the right person, the relationship should not be close, it is suitable for listening to the object, and the consequences are not responsible, it is best to start to be silent from the moment you want to speak.
No one can understand your pain.
Mark Twain once said:
If you express your emotions to someone who disagrees with you, you know that the underlying logic of the advice given by the other person is not to support you, but to transform you.
Others can't understand your pain, just like Luo Zijun in "The First Half of My Life", a stay-at-home mother, who has no worries about food and clothing, and enjoys the happiness of life that many women can't enjoy.
But Luo Zijun is not confident, always suspects that her husband has an extramarital lover, and even makes a big fuss about her husband's company.
Chen Junsheng didn't know why Luo Zijun did this, as a pillow, he couldn't understand that the woman in the family was good enough to panic as a stay-at-home mother and a husband who cheated on society, and he only felt troubled when he saw Luo Zijun's behavior.
If the person next to you is like this, then so will the others.
Even if someone can truly understand your pain, they can't give you the means to change, when you confide in you without reservation, only to find that the other person can't give you any help, or even turn around and leave, there is a feeling of indifference, which will only deepen your discomfort and loneliness.
Complaining is an emotional outburst.
The more unhappy people are in life, the easier it is to complain to others.
This seemingly normal behavior is actually a person's weak ability to manage emotions and loose control.
Complaining to the outside world is an outburst of emotions and the transmission of negative energy to others. If you share your negative emotions with those who are already weak in the energy field, you will only get more negative advice and make your mood more and more pessimistic.
When you open up to someone, you feel a sense of release and relief. However, this feeling is temporary, it can drain your emotional energy, and doing so often can make you feel tired and powerless.