My name is Zheng Shuang, I am 28 years old and I am a cosmetics salesperson. I was born into a family of ordinary workers, my dad was a taxi driver and my mom worked odd jobs in a garment factory. We came from an average family, but my parents were very attentive to me and my siblings.
I grew up with good grades, and after graduating from high school, I was admitted to a general university majoring in marketing. I worked hard in four years of college and finally got my degree. After graduating, I got a job as a salesperson at a well-known cosmetics company. Although I have a busy job, the salary is good, and I have accumulated a wealth of sales experience.
As I got older, my mother began to tell me to meet more excellent young people, and from time to time introduced some blind dates to me. I told my mom that now that my career was going well, I didn't want to think about getting married so early. But my mother still thinks that girls should start a family when they are older, otherwise they will be "leftovers".
In order to reassure my mother, I had to go on a blind date once in a while. But I am very picky about the blind date, and I require the man to have at least a house and a car, an education not lower than mine, and he must be handsome and cheerful. So every time I go on a blind date, I will put forward all kinds of harsh conditions after seeing each other, and the other party will also think that I am too picky after listening, so the two sides will break up.
In this way, I have been on dozens of blind dates in a row, but none of them have been successful. My mother was anxious when she saw that I was always on a blind date without results. Yesterday, she suddenly called ** to tell me, and introduced me to a blind date, so that I must meet this time.
Mom, didn't you say that the man on the blind date last time was very good, he was handsome, and his family background was good, but his temper was a little anxious, and he still didn't work out in the end. "I tried to explain to my mom.
Shuangshuang, you're 28 years old, and it's really late if you don't get married!You can meet this boy, and maybe you'll succeed this time. Mom begged in the **.
Well, I'll meet you this time. But there's no guarantee that I'll agree. I reluctantly agreed to my mother.
After hanging up**, I sat on the edge of the bed and fell into deep thought. I don't know how many blind dates I've been on a blind date, but I still resist marriage in my heart. I now live on my own, have a stable job, and live comfortably. If I do get married, am I ready to give up my job and raise my husband and children at home?Am I really ready to spend my life with a stranger?
I don't even know the name of the blind date this time. My mother only told me that it was her friend's son, who worked as a manager in a listed company, and was still single. It sounds similar to the person who was introduced by my mother before, and I guess it will be difficult to get results after this meeting.
But in order to make my mother happy, I will still go to this blind date. Tomorrow is the day of the blind date, and I want to get a good night's sleep and recuperate enough to cope with this usual process.
My mother called me early in the morning to tell me all the details to pay attention to on the blind date, and finally told me to be nice to that boy. I answered a few times and said I was going out.
The blind date was set in a private room at a high-end restaurant. I arrived 15 minutes early and found out that the other party hadn't arrived yet. The waiter took me to the private room, and I sat upright in the private room for a while, silently thinking in my heart that I should calm down and not be too anxious to make conditions to the boy.
After a while, the waiter knocked on the door to inform that the other party was coming. I gathered my emotions and straightened up to the door. I saw a tall man walking in with the waiter. He wears a crisp black suit, gold-rimmed glasses, and his hair is meticulously combed back to his head, looking like an elite white-collar worker in a TV series. I looked at him in amazement, and wondered if my mother had found such a marriage partner to my taste
The man nodded at me, then shook hands with me, "Hello, my name is Li Lei, please take care of me." His voice was low and gentle.
Hello, I'm Zheng Shuang. I replied with some shiness.
The two of them sat down in the private room, and I took a sip of tea to try to hide my nervousness. The other party looked elegant and behaved well, which made me a little hard to believe that he would be the kind of person with a bad temper that my mother said.
Just when I was secretly looking at the other party, Li Lei spoke: "I heard my mother say that this time it was your mother who introduced us to the blind date?"”
Yes, my mom and yours are old friends. I replied implicitly.
Well, my mom told me about your family. But I don't know anything about you, I don't know what you like to do, what your hobbies areLi Lei asked.
Seeing Li Lei listening quietly, I suddenly stopped in the middle of my words, and lowered my head a little embarrassed. Maybe the boys will think that my hobbies are too feminine.
Hehe," Li Lei smiled, "It sounds like you're a girl who loves life." I also admire people who are passionate about life. ”
Hearing him say this, I smiled slightly, and felt that Li Lei seemed to be more reasonable than I imagined. Just as the two were chatting with each other, the waiter knocked on the door and came in, and the food began.
Looking at the delicious food on the table, I felt a little hungry and planned to start eating. At this moment, Li Lei suddenly spoke, and his voice was a little serious: "I heard my mother say that you have been on a blind date many times before, but every time you meet, you will put forward a lot of conditions, causing the other party to think that you are too picky, so it has not been successful?"”
As soon as I heard Li Lei say this, my heart sank, and I had a hunch that things might develop in the direction I imagined. I put down my chopsticks, raised my head to look at Li Lei, and nodded slowly.
Li Lei was silent for a while, as if organizing the wording. After a while, he spoke again: "Zheng Shuang, I can understand your situation. Nowadays, society is demanding more and more from women, and you don't want to find a guy who can't stand with you. However, I still hope that you will relax some conditions, give the other person some opportunities, and give the relationship some time to develop. ”
When I heard him say this, I had mixed feelings. I know what he means, but it's a little hard for me to accept the relaxation of conditions to accept an imperfect marriage. "Li Lei, I know what you mean. But a girl my age would want to have a secure life and someone to rely on, can you understand that?”
Li Lei sighed and said, "Of course I understand your thoughts. But I prefer that you don't have preconceived notions and give me a fair treatment. You can make hopes, but also give me the opportunity to make your wishes come true. Marriage requires both parties to run together, which takes time. ”
I still wanted to argue a few words, but looking at Li Lei's sincere gaze, my words came to my mouth and swallowed back. Maybe I should really give the other person a chance instead of asking for it as soon as I come up, I thought to myself.
Okay, you have a point. Would you like to tell me more about yourself?I want to know more about you too. I asked tentatively.
Of course. Li Lei nodded, "My surname is Li, I am 30 years old this year, and I am currently working as a project manager in an Internet company. The salary is in the middle and upper level of this industry, which is okay. I don't own a property myself, but the deposit balance is also enough to make a good living. I have a more stable personality, I am very focused at work, and I also care about my family and friends in life. I hope this introduction can give you a preliminary understanding of me. After that, we can slowly deepen the conversation and see if it is suitable. ”
After listening to Li Lei's self-introduction, the image in front of me immediately became clear in my heart. He speaks well, and his personality is like a decent gentleman. Although I don't have a house yet, I am young and promising, and my future is limitless. Perhaps, as he said, give him some time and he will be able to achieve my ideal standard.
Li Lei, I think you're pretty good. It's just that I want to confirm that if we are really together, are you willing to work the house and the car to make our standard of living better in the future?I couldn't help but ask the question.
Li Lei looked at me quietly, and after a few seconds, he suddenly smiled: "Zheng Shuang, if I marry you, I still have to support your family?"Don't you understand my plans?”
My eyes widened in surprise. What do you mean, he doesn't look down on me and my family?I was about to have a seizure, but Li Lei raised a hand to stop me.
Don't get excited, listen to me. I mean, I'm not going to work so hard to buy a house and a car just to meet your standards. I will make life better and better at my own pace and through my own efforts. If you choose to be with me, then you need to trust me and give me time. You can't expect me to live up to your ideal standards right away, that's unrealistic. ”
I nodded slightly, feeling that what I had just done was naïve. I shouldn't have questioned people right out of the way, because I lose a lot of possibilities. Maybe I should really adjust my mindset and learn to tolerate and wait.
This blind date made me think newly. I decided to let go of my preconceptions, not to have preconceived notions, and to give the other person a chance to get to know the real him. Love takes time to cultivate, and I shouldn't rush it. This will also be the direction of my future study Xi.
This blind date made me reflect a lot.
I found myself setting the bar too high for who I married. What "to have a house and a car", "education is not lower than mine", these are only superficial, and do not represent a person's true quality. I neglected the more important internal factors, such as being honest and self-motivated.
In fact, to judge a person's quality is not based on what he currently has, but on whether his outlook on life and value orientation meet your expectations. Li Lei may not have too many material conditions now, but I can feel from his words and deeds that he is a down-to-earth gentleman. For me, that's more important than the condition of the motorhome.
In the past, the reason why my criteria for choosing a mate were so narrow was also related to my upbringing. I came from a low-income family, and when I was a child, I lacked resources, so I subconsciously longed for a life of material abundance. I hope to use the economic power of the subject to make up for my own shortcomings. But this kind of thinking is too utilitarian and disrespectful to the other half.
Now I understand that material things are important, but they are not as good as spiritual fit. I shouldn't expect my partner to give me the best life right away, I should think more about whether he really loves me and is responsible. The rest of the time will tell.
In addition to this, I also realized that my attitude towards feelings was a bit evasive and passive. I always "demand" from the other person, rather than offering to give. In fact, the relationship requires both parties to invest together, understand each other, and grow together. I can't just think about getting and not giving.
Hearing Li Lei's sharing this time made me re-examine myself. Maybe God gave me this blind date opportunity in the hope that I would change my previous cognitive model and become a more positive, optimistic and inclusive person.
Li Lei, you're right. We should understand and fulfill each other. Emotional matters can't be rushed, I do need some time to adjust my mentality and get to know you slowly. I said to Li Lei sincerely.
Well, progress counts step by step. Let's start with friends, shall we?A hint of joy flashed in Li Lei's eyes.
Okay, so let's get to know each other. I finally smiled happily.
This blind date gave me a whole new understanding of myself. Maybe the result is not as "perfect" as I imagined, but if you are too demanding of perfection, you will lose the happiness that you could have obtained. I have to learn to let go of prejudices, open my heart, and spend time with people who are destined to spend time.
When I got home, I called my mother and told her a brief about today's situation. My mother was very happy when she heard this, and she smiled and said, "Mom said that this boy is not simple. Shuangshuang, Mom just wants you to have a good time, and nothing else is the most important. ”
Hang up**, I looked at the flowers blooming in the courtyard outside the window, and a trace of long-lost warmth welled up in my heart. Maybe in a casual moment, my other half will quietly appear and walk into my world. From now on, I will welcome every new encounter with a positive and joyful heart.
Later, Li Lei and I began to contact frequently. We will talk to each other, and we will also make an appointment to go to the mall, eat and watch movies together.
I found Li Lei to be a strong and gentle person at heart. He is highly ambitious and very committed to the company's work, often working overtime until late. But because he knows that this is the only way to realize his own value. I admire Li Lei's perseverance and determination.
At the same time, Li Lei is also very generous to his friends. Once my best friend had a birthday, Li Lei offered to invite us to dinner, and gave my best friend a valuable handbag as a gift. I could feel the kindness and maturity in his heart.
Li Lei also often cares about my life and feelings. One day I was not in a good mood due to the pressure of work, Li Lei took me to the playground to play, flash, so that I could be happy. We had a great time that day, and my worries disappeared without a trace.
The days with Li Lei make me feel happy and satisfied. I also gradually realized that the fulfillment of life does not lie in how much material things I have, but in having someone to entrust. Sometimes we.
I don't think I'm bothered anymore that Li Lei doesn't have an RV at the moment. I believe in his quality and in his commitment to us. The most important thing now is that he gave me a heart that is sincere to me, which is more precious than anything else.
In this way, our relationship grew stronger and stronger. Six months later, Li Lei officially proposed to me. When he knelt down at the candlelight dinner and confessed his sincerity to me, I burst into tears.
Zheng Shuang, this half a year of getting along is the happiest time in my life. It's a blessing to meet you, and it's an honor to be with you. I will spend my life loving you and taking care of you. Will you please marry me?Li Lei said affectionately.
Li Lei, I do!I threw myself into his arms excitedly.
On the day of my wedding, Li Lei drove a brand-new Porsche to pick me up. "This is my wedding present to you. He looked at me warmly. I knew that in this moment, I had found true happiness and belonging.
When the car drove away slowly, I looked at Li Lei's handsome and gentle side face, and a sense of sweetness and emotion surged in my heart. I understand that love is not about having, it's about giving. If I insisted on material conditions, I would have lost the opportunity to meet Li Lei.
Maybe God destined us to meet, destined me to change myself and become a better person. In the journey of life, every encounter has its special meaning. I will be grateful to Li Lei for coming into my world, and I am also grateful to God for giving us this opportunity to go on a blind date.