Workplace Skills Competition
We go to work with a lot of blood, just because we like one thing: making money. And we resign with a lot of blood, but often because we hate one or more people, fighting with the sky, the earth, and people Sometimes it is not endless fun, but sadness. Do you want to roar when you see that the road is uneven, and shoot when it's time to shoot?
When do people pursue fairness?When you are not a vested interest. What you say is unfair may not be unfair, but unfair to me. Therefore, people only want fairness when they are weak, and fairness seems to be a position, but in fact, it is often interests that stand behind it.
We are angry not because of unfairness, but because we are at a disadvantage in the midst of unfairness, and we do not want to eliminate this unfairness, but we want to put ourselves in a favorable position in the midst of unfairness.
Again, fairness is not average. Fairness comes from comparison, not suffering from few, but suffering from unevenness. I can't eat, everyone can't eat, I don't have an opinion;I ate meat, and there were people eating seafood, and I was angry. When you say it's unfair, you're not saying it's unfair, it's unequal, but average is the biggest unfairness.
Why can't bosses be treated equally?
Why can't the leader level the bowl of water?
Because fairness is not the purpose of management at all!
In the house you live in, some walls are load-bearing walls, and some walls are only separated, and the walls that separate can be demolished, but the load-bearing walls cannot be demolished. Corresponding to the role in the workplace, some employees are "load-bearing walls", while others are just "separation walls".
For example, if you have a conflict with a colleague, who will the leader turn to?It has nothing to do with who is right and who is wrong, and the leader will not administer justice unless it is beneficial to him.
To solve any problem, we must start from the interests of the other party, and the problem will be solved. Once detached from this principle, all actions are wrong.
You have to consider the interests of the leader first and then your own interests, and the leader will think like this: It is right to benefit me in this matter, and it is wrong to be bad for me. The workplace is not a court, the leader is not a judge, what he has to do is not to distinguish between right and wrong, but to weigh the pros and cons, for him, the most important thing is to quickly calm the conflict without affecting the work.
For another example, colleagues always bully you, and the crux of the problem is **?Not with your colleagues, but with your leaders. A colleague bullies you, doesn't your boss know?If the leader explicitly forbids him to bully you, will he dare?The person you really need to solve is not this colleague, but your leader.
The biggest mistake many people make is to look at the problem as the problem itself.
Ray Dalio, "Principles".
Unless you're ready to resign, don't call your boss in public. If you think about it, if you are the leader, your subordinates scold you, you win back, and others think that you are oppressive with power;You have lost in return, you can't even handle your subordinates, your authority has declined;You get a tie, and your level seems to be like that. If you're a leader, don't you feel bad?
Therefore, you can't say that you will be 100% in small shoes if you scare the leader, but as long as there is the right opportunity, he will definitely not let you have a good time. Your boss may not have much skills, but he can get you in this position. Even if you apologize after the scolding, the thorn that pierced his heart can't be pulled out.
It's not that you can't scare the leader, do you want to think about a good deal?
You think you can go head-to-head with your leader, but in fact you may not know anything about ...... meansHe just needs to leave important things to you not to do, and he doesn't give you any chances, and marginalizing you is enough to disgust you.
Private department dinners, everyone else is there, just don't call you, don't shy away from letting you know, and even let the people around you marginalize you together, when others don't come to the meeting, everyone will call, you don't come, no one calls you ......Marginalization is a very fatal blow to a person's psychological feelings, and you may not be able to bear it.
So, I can't afford to hide from it, can I change jobs?
If you keep taking a detour, when will you get to the end?When getting along with any leader, the basic principle is to follow the hair, don't do it with him, you can't change him, just change the way you get along with him. Don't feel too compromised, no, you have to be careful about the temper of cats and dogs, just strengthen your interpersonal skills.
So, can I go and ask for the help of the big leaders?
The task of a big leader in the workplace is also not to do justice, he needs whoever he needs more, and he is more tolerant of whom. Who do you say the big leader will favor between you and your leader?It depends on who is more valuable to him, interests determine the position, unless you do the work, he can't find a second person, you can't be replaced.
Not being a leader does not mean that those who come do not refuse. If the things arranged by the leader are contrary to your principles of life and work, or even illegal, you must gently and firmly refuse, and do not be ambiguous, otherwise you will fall deeper and deeper. And, in addition to refusal, you have to think about whether such a leader is worth following.
For another example, you are as busy as a dog, but your colleagues are idle, and the leader wants to press you aliveFirst, don't reply too quickly, you can say, "Give me some time, I'll figure it out before I get back to you."
As soon as he opened his mouth, you refused, and it was not cool that you were the leader. To take care of the other party's emotions, you have thought about it and then refuse, saying that the concubine can't do it, and the feeling that it is at least not hasty to give him. Even if you agree, it's best to play a reluctant role.
Second, no one likes to be rejected, so there must be skills in refusal, and you can use the leader to do multiple-choice questions: "Leader, I have a total of four things at hand, plus the things you just want to give me, a total of five, I and you are more urgent about which ones, I have a good focus, if one, two, three are in a hurry, I will do it this week, and the remaining four and five I will complete it next week." ”
Note: I don't just refuse, I put the choice in the hands of the leader and let the leader make the decision. I didn't shirk, my starting point is to do things well, this is the skill of speaking, the leader feels that the time is not ok, and it can be handed over to others to do.
Third, if the leader doesn't care about 3721, he wants to hand it over to me, what should I do?You can't control the leader, can't you control the pace of your own work?You can't take the job, but what to do, when to do it, you still can't control it?
Upward management is the expectation of management leaders.
Don't have the illusion that leaders are considerate of you, there are but few such leaders. One of the human nature is to inadvertently test the other party's bottom line, this time you agreed, next time it will only be doubled, you are like a robot cat, your body will be hollowed out sooner or later. The rivers and lakes are not just fighting and killing, the rivers and lakes are sophisticated.
Let's talk about a profound truth:
Reducing stress is the path to your growth.
It's especially easy to get angry when something happens, because in your world, the distance between stimuli and responses is almost zero, and all your actions, thoughts, and emotions are stressful.
Learning to slow down the pace of response, first thinking about why I am angry, how to regulate it, how to deal with it, this process is actually a kind of vipassana and introspection. Take a step back and leave some distance between the stimulus and the response, and this distance is the path on which you will grow.
The Peach Blossom Pond is thousands of feet deep, and it is not as good as Brother Ming to talk about job hunting!