Should I find someone stronger than me, or should I find someone who is weaker than me and who knows how to be considerate?
After many years of struggle, the company has a good appearance, but I have unconsciously passed the year of establishment, and the problem of marriage can not be delayed any longer, otherwise, the woman's childbearing period will be over.
It's not that I can't find it, it's not that no one is chasing me, it's just that I don't want to waste my energy and time dealing with trivial things like relationship problems and life problems.
Actually, stop and think about it, no matter how hard I work and earn more money, in the end, isn't it for the trivial things of life?Relationship problems, life problems, parents and children, etc., ......
I'm really good, graduated from a prestigious school, although I look ordinary, but my IQ is not low, I have poetry and books in my belly, I have beads in my mouth, I have unique skills in my hands, I have money in my pocket, and I have a company in my name. Find a makeup artist to sketch your eyebrows and eyes, put on a gorgeous dress that ordinary beauties can't afford, and stand in the crowd, which is the gold and silver shining in the sand, which is very different.
In this drunken society, there must be no shortage of people chasing me, seeing money and seeing that my eyes are full of true love. Even if I am an older leftover girl, 33 years old, it is the same, older than me, younger than me, stronger than me, inferior to mine, all of them.
If I want to get married, I can get a handsome guy out of my hand.
So, what is holding me back from getting married?Concept.
I'm not looking for an ideal love, I'm not in love, I'm pragmatic, I don't want that ethereal soul mate.
What I think about is, what benefits will marriage bring me, what use will it be, just as a companion child?No way. What I don't understand is what kind of married life I should live, whether it is an altruistic marriage or an egoistic marriage, whether there is a marriage that is beneficial to both parties, and what to do.
This can't be an experiment, it can't be like an exam, and if you fail the test, you can do it again. Otherwise, I might have done an experiment and decided that I wouldn't be so confused.
With this question in mind, I went home.
When people are old, they like to live in the old circle of friends in their hometown, even in Shanghai. I bought them one of the few air-conditioned buildings in the county. They moved into a new house, but they didn't have a good face for me, a dutiful daughter. When I got home, my mother made me a table of dishes waiting for me, but when she saw me, her brow couldn't be stretched. My father simply went out playing chess and didn't come back.
In the community, many neighbors will look back twice when they see my Mercedes. However, when I heard that I was the daughter of so-and-so who mixed well outside, but was not married at the age of 33, I shook my head and pouted.
I wondered and asked my mother, "I'm relatively successful, why am I so unliked?"No one envies me?”
My mother: "If a woman doesn't get married and have children, she won't be successful." ”
Me: "But I'm very good, I took the college entrance examination to explore flowers in the county, I have a house and a company in Shanghai, and I am still very filial, and I bought you the best house in the county." How many people at my age can do it?It's all jealousy!”
My mother: "No matter how much money you make, if you don't have children, it's extinct, no people, nothing is useful." In the human society, cutting off children and grandchildren is the greatest irresponsibility and disrespect for heaven and earth. ”
I thought about it for a moment and said, "I see." I'm coming back this time to ask you, what kind of person should I look for, among the people chasing me, I have locked on three targets, but I don't know how to choose. Aren't women generally looking for someone who is better than themselves?However, I want to find someone stronger than myself, I am afraid that he will want me to be his good wife and mother, merge my company under him, take him as the master, revolve around him, serve him, become his vassal, the energy will be sucked away, and I will have to take care of the child after giving birth. The family company has grown, and I am afraid that he will cheat. If I marry someone worse than me, my face will be dull, I'm afraid that others will laugh at me for not marrying well, and I don't want to stick to a man. ”
My mother: "Let me ask you, after you get married, do you want to focus on your family, or do you still want to be a company?"”
Me: "Of course I'm going to do my business!."I want to make a career out of my life. ”
My mother: "Your second grandfather's father-in-law is very rich, and he once taught his son that when you grow up and do things yourself, I will restrict you from spending other money, but I will hire a nanny for you, and I must spend this money for you, and I can't save it." Why are farmers poor?Why is the boss rich?Because farmers have to raise pigs, raise children, do farm work, cook, do laundry, they can do anything, but nothing has anything to do with making money. The boss only thinks about one thing - to make money. Everything else is left to the employee, or the family member, or the nanny. Less is gained, more is confused. Those who do specialized work are rich, and those who do miscellaneous work are poor, it's as simple as that!Poor people, always running after money!And the rich are always running after the problem!Do you understand?”
I looked at my mother and said, "Well, I know, I'm going to make money!"”
My mother: "Marriage is the same, a man who wants to do a career should find a good wife and mother, a good mother, a good helper, and give his wife chores to do to achieve himself." On the other hand, if you are a woman, if you want to achieve yourself, you must find someone who is willing to serve you, take on all the chores in the family, and share the money with him. Don't care about spending money on him. ”
Me: "Mom, do you want me to find a successful son-in-law, or do you want to be myself and find a son-in-law who is not good?"”
My Mother: "Be yourself." I don't care what he does, just be good to you and the child, just take care of the family. ”
I knew what kind of husband I was looking for, and I quickly made my choice and got married.
Author: Wei Feihong: Writer, psychological counselor. In the colorful world and human feelings, figure out the criteria behind the success or failure of life and whether you are happy or not, and show you.