Hi hello wow, this is Xiang Nuan.
Yesterday morning, the alarm clock did not go off, the whole family overslept, and when I was woken up by the cat, it was already half past eight.
So he woke up the child in a panic and arranged breakfast.
Seeing that I was a little panicked, my sister comforted me and said: Mom, you don't have to worry, at least we have slept enough, and it's fine!
After all, my younger brother was late for the first time, and he was a little anxious, and his brushing posture was deformed.
My sister comforted him again: It's okay, this will be recess exercise, there is no one in the class, we can go directly to the classroom.
When my sister said this, we all put our minds at ease, cleaned up, took breakfast, and drove them directly to school.
When I got home in the evening, I asked the two children again: You were late in the morning, and the teacher didn't criticize you, right?
The younger brother said: The whole class has gathered around, asking questions, next time I will never be late.
My sister said: Once in a while, the teacher won't say anything;It's not like this every day, teachers criticize people for being angry and reducing their lifespan, and they don't like it themselves.
Unexpectedly, both children were emotionally stable.
Especially my sister, before I want to change it, I guess I haven't opened my eyes yet, and the tears have already come down, so I must blame us for not calling her.
But this time, not only did I not get angry, but I was able to comfort my brother and me very steadily, and I really grew up a lot.
I was surprised by the change in my sister.
After something bad happens, canFind out the positive side: At least we got a good night's sleep.
My brother is in a hurry, but it's okayFind a way to mitigate it: There is no one in the recess class, so you can go straight into the classroom.
The teacher didn't criticize, and she couldEmpathy: Criticizing people for being angry and reducing their longevity, teachers don't like it either.
It's not just a change in behavior, it's a change in mindset
I began to reflect on why these changes were happening and what exactly were we doing right
First of all, definitelyA change in the family atmosphere
My husband and I usually follow it".Don't blame and find a way to deal with thingsSo no matter what happens, our first instinct is to find a solution, not to blame each other and vent our emotions.
So when the two children made mistakes and encountered problems, they also dared to admit it, dare to confide in us and ask for help.
Secondly, yesA change in the mindset of parents
Since the beginning of this year, I have really rarely been anxious, because I have started to plan my growth in "years", focusing on what can be done, rather than what has not happened.
Parents' anxiety is actually contagious to their children. Under the shroud of anxiety, your care and help for your children will be deformed.
Your child will be distracted in response to your anxiety, unable to focus on learning and self-exploration, and may even become pleasing and well-behaved in order to appease your anxiety.
And these will affect the normal growth and psychological development of children.
Finally, yesTrust and respect for your child
In the previous articleWell, don't pretend!I admit that borrowing AI has increased productivity by 80%.I mentioned that the child's tablet is kept by himself, which is actually based on trust and respect for the child, because I believe that they can plan their own time and organize their homework, and it turns out that they do.
Usually when we encounter matters involving them, we will ask for their opinions and let them make their own decisions.
When children feel the trust and respect of their parents, they will naturally have a sense of responsibility and mission, and they will be more active in learning and living.
In an ordinary family, the best thing that can be given to a child is unconditional love and trust.
A normal, loving, and warm childhood is the most precious gift parents can give their children.
At the beginning of life, it comes from the unconditional love of parents, which can be used as armor for a lifetimeWhen I was a child, I was "carefree", and when I grew up, I was "fearless".
I hope today's article can inspire you.