Chinese culture has a history of more than 5,000 years, and in the long course of history, there are many words and sayings that are used to warn future generations.
For example, our country has existed since ancient times"If a husband and wife do not send a funeral, the funeral will suffer."Many people said that they could not understand such a statement.
The husband and wife are one, and the two were in harmony and love before their deaths, why can't the other party even send them off on the last journey after they leave?
What kind of historical origin and practical wisdom does this seemingly superstitious funeral Xi contain?Is it still relevant today?
In the ancient feudal society of our country,Women have a low statusThe main role of women is to inherit the reception and continue the family incense, and after the death of the husband, the funeral should be presided over by the male clanFemale dependents should not come forward to deal with itOtherwise, it is easy to see interference and disrespect for the family.
This phenomenon was especially obvious in the Tang Dynasty, when social turmoil, people's hearts were not ancient, and tomb robbery was very rampantRobbers often target the elderly, weak, women and children in funeral processions.
In order to curb this trend, there are many unwritten funeral rules up and down, such as:"White-haired people do not send black-haired people", "husbands and wives do not send funerals", etc., the purpose is to protect the safety of the elderly involved in the funeral.
From this,"Husbands and wives do not send funerals".It has gradually become a social norm that everyone abides by, and it has been inherited to this day, and over time, everyone has Xi it, believing that this is the wisdom left by the ancestorsIf you dare to violate it, you will attract retribution from heaven and affect your descendants
Many people think that "husband and wife do not have a funeral" is a superstition, but it is notThere is a very realistic humanistic concern behind this.
In the social context of that time, such Xi did take into account the interests of the living, and also reflected the cherishing of life.
Let's first put ourselves in the shoes of a loving old couple who have been growing old together for decades, and they have experienced so many ups and downs in life togetherTheir relationship has long been sublimated from physical fit to heart fit
At this time, if the husband or wife dies, how will the other half be affected and hit?
We can imagine that the separation of life and death is undoubtedly a great pain for the living, longIn the period of suffering, it is likely that the body will be weak, lose appetite, and be heartbroken all day.
What's more, for the elderly, if one party dies and the other party is still alive, then the age must not be young, and people are prone to problems as soon as they are old.
If the body of the elderly who participated in the funeral ceremony ifSuffering from high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, etcIn the case of these chronic diseases, if they are to endure the labor of grief and funeral at this time, the consequences will be unimaginable.
Secondly, let's imagine the funeral situation in ancient times, the funeral procession had to walk dozens of miles, the road was long, the time was long, and the road was very rugged through the mountains.
This is inevitably powerless for the old and weak surviving spouse, and in ancient times, robbers appeared on the road from time to time, which was very dangerous, and these bandits were very arrogantIn the event of an attack, it is easy to incur **
In addition, during the funeral,People tend to be extremely sad and emotionalIf the wife is present, the two will resonate emotionally, the pain will increase, and they are more likely to have out-of-control behaviors, such as crying hysterically or holding on to the coffin.
Not only is this detrimental to the sense of ceremony, but it can also lead to health problems and even safety incidents.
From this, we can understand that the ancients followed"Husbands and wives do not send funerals".'s funeral Xi, in fact, comes fromPractical considerations to protect life safety and care for the health of the livingNot superstition or **.
This kind"Humanistic thinking".This practice reflects the cherishing of life in China's traditional culture.
Well, here comes the question, which is based on the proverb that has been handed down from the previous social development to this dayThe society we live in has changed dramatically, does this saying still apply?
In today's society, with the increase in education, many funeral tradition Xi s are being diluted.
However, for the vast majority of ordinary people, they will still choose to follow"Husbands and wives do not send funerals".This is because forced funerals may not only overload one's physical and mental capacity, but may also lead to tension or even breakup in family relationships.Xi
For example, Mrs. Zhang's husband, Mr. Li, passed away, and she was determined to send her wife on the last ride to show her persistence in love.
But the elders of the village to"Breaking the old rules".For this reason, Yan Zi stopped her behavior, and even threatened to break off her friendship, and Mrs. Zhang had to give up her wishAt the same time, it also planted hidden dangers between her and some people in the village.
Of course, if it is really necessary to accompany the deceased on his last journeyFor example, expressing personal emotions and remembering the feelings of husband and wifeIt should not be criticized too much by the outside world, and the emotional needs of the living should be empathetic, understood and respected.
After all, the elderly are deeply concerned about their deceased lovers, which is a characteristic of their generation, but in basic reality, the concept of funeral in modern society is still more enlightened and inclusive.
The best thing to do at the moment,It is still based on the specific circumstances of the living, such as physical condition and family relationship, if it is really within your ability, and with the support of your family, you don't have to stick to tradition and give up your will.
That's it"Husbands and wives do not send funerals".After understanding the reason, you must have your own opinion on this sentence in your heart.
Whether you think it's superstitious or not, or if you think that this sentence has a certain amount of truth, you still have to be rational about such things.
However, different regions also have different funeral Xi, and you can also arrange funeral ceremonies according to the Xi customs of your hometown.
So, what are the customs and Xi of your hometown when holding funerals?
Let's take the example of funeral rites in a small number of areas, where there is a death in the familyThen the body of the deceased will be transferred to the straw mat as soon as possible.
Immediately afterwards, the mourning hall will be set up, incense burner offerings, and candlesAnd so on, to pay tribute to the deceased and to light the way ahead for the deceased.
After the mourning hall is set up, the relatives will start a multi-day vigil, one by one"Funeral".In addition, during the wake, filial piety clothes must be worn, and the deceased can only be taken off and changed back into his own clothes after the deceased is buried.
The process of burial is extremely tedious, first of all, it is not only necessary to choose a suitable day for burial, but also to choose a good cemetery to bury the deceased.
When the deceased is placed in the coffin, it is placed in the coffinA big "longevity" word, put on a shroud for the deceased, and the female relatives of the family will hold up the feet of the deceased and put them in the coffin, and cover them with those prepared in advance"Baizi Shou quilt".can be crowned official.
If the chosen burial date arrives, the coffin of the deceased will be carried to the cemetery, and the funeral procession will begin as the eldest son breaks the casserole in which the money was burned.
On the way to the tomb,Someone will drop paper money,It is intended to leave money for the deceased to buy the road, to reach the cemetery, and place the coffin in the soil dug in advanceRelatives each grabbed a handful of soil and sprinkled it on the coffin before burying it, you can leave, and then the coffin is completely buried in the earth.
After all the rituals are completed, the soul of the deceased will be inconvenient to drive the crane west, so far heaven and man will be separated forever, and here, the children's affairs have not been completely doneThey also had to pay their respects at the grave of the deceased every seven days.
This goes on seven timesThe festival is held every seven daysAlthough the traditional funeral rites are very cumbersome, all the rituals reflect the respect and nostalgia of the living for the dead.
In addition to these funeral customs, there are many taboos that you don't want to touch when you attend a funeralNot only will it affect the funeral, but it will also be a great disrespect to the deceased.
So, do you know what are the taboos that we need to be aware of when holding a funeral?Let me find out!
First of all,Do not take photos at the funeral, especially when the body is cremated, never use a camera in the crematorium, because these places are the habitat of the soul of the deceased, very serious placesThe rash use of the camera will disturb the deceased and is disrespectful to the deceased.
In addition, when attending a funeral, don't dress too flamboyantlyIn particular, don't wear red and purple clothingYou're here for a funeral, not a wedding.
A funeral is a sad affair, and your outfit may cause displeasure in the main familyThey will feel that your attire is disrespectful to the deceased.
In addition, when attending a funeral,It must be serious and solemn, and the mood should not fluctuate too much, It is very normal to be sad in the face of life and death, but don't cry too gaffeThis will not only have an impact on yourself, but also create a sad atmosphere.
Not only that, but it is more important to pay attention toDon't frolic in front of the coffin, and don't step on or straddle the coffinThese are all things we need to pay attention to when attending a funeral, and some people may think that these are just superstitions.
However, it is still the same sentence"If you believe, you will have, and if you do not believe, you will not."As young people in the new era, many people don't know about funeral culture, so in the case of ignorance, we can't act rashly, while shocking the deceased, causing the Lord's family to be disgusted.
With the development of the times, the cultural level of human beings has been improved, and many previous cultures have gradually disappeared and have not been passed down.
However, since it can be passed down over time, it must be true.
So, no matter what kind of attitude you have towards these things, or try to avoid such things from happening, this is not only a respect for others, but also a reflection of your own mature side.