I m 55 years old, and my new girlfriend has not been living together for a long time, and she is und

Mondo Parenting Updated on 2024-01-28

My name is Li Hua, I am 60 years old, and I used to be an executive in a private company. My wife passed away five years ago and I raised my two children on my own. Last year, my son finally graduated, found a satisfying job and got married, and I, as a father, can finally breathe a sigh of relief.

Maybe it's because I've been alone for too long, and I'm starting to feel empty and lonely in my life. I am an introvert, and I go home to live a regular life after work, occasionally going to the park for a walk, playing chess, and not socializing with people much.

And so it was until last year that my life changed. It was on a park bench that I met Wang Yan. I walked around the park as usual that day, and as soon as I sat down on the bench, I saw a gray-haired woman sitting next to me.

She was wearing simple and plain old clothes, and her expression seemed a little melancholy. I casually asked her a few words, and she calmly struck up a conversation with me. Since that day, Wang Yan and I have become old friends of the park.

Wang Yan is a few years younger than me, her husband died early, and her children are all out of town, so she lives alone in a rented house nearby. She doesn't usually have much entertainment, so we can talk, so we often go for walks and play chess in the park.

In this way, Wang Yan and I have known each other for more than a year. We are both simple old people, but our relationship is getting better and better. When I mention Wang Yan, there is always an indescribable warmth in my heart, which is both fresh and makes me feel stable.

One weekend, Wang Yan suddenly said: "Hua, we have known each other for so long, I think the relationship is quite stable, should you consider living together?"Your family is in good condition and the house is big, so I'll move in and live with you. I hesitated and said, "Living together is a big deal, and it needs to be carefully considered." ”

I invited Lin Yan to move in with me, but I was troubled by her smoking, lying in bed, and not dressing up. Although I tried to communicate with her, she didn't seem to understand my thoughts.

Now I am faced with a difficult choice, should I continue to live with her or find another solution?

I was a little puzzled about how she had become so different, and couldn't help but talk to her: "Yanzi, we have lived together for a while, your life Xi has changed a little, you smoke in bed every day, you don't dress up much, and you dress casually at home." ”

Lin Yan immediately said unhappily: "I'm in my own home, of course I can be casual, what does this have to do with you?"Why do you care so much?I explained, "I just don't think your life Xi is good, pay attention to your health." ”

Lin Yan said indifferently: "You manage too much, I have my own life, you don't have to command me blindly." "I was a little embarrassed and was silent for a while, trying to calm myself down.

Swallow, I didn't care about you, and I didn't think you should listen to me because you lived in my house. I said as gently as possible, "It's just that after living together, I have to have a little coordination of life Xi, I don't care about smoking, but the smell of smoke is too heavy will affect me, I won't really wake you up when you lie in bed, just remind me, because I have to go to work on time."

I didn't ask you to dress up, I just thought that your state might not be right, and it would affect your health. Lin Yan sneered: "You think my smoke smells too strong, I have a sense of proportion, and I won't smoke the house."

What does it matter to you that I lie in bed, I will get up myself, you don't have to care. What I wear or what I do, you don't care about a big man. You just want to control my life, don't think I don't know.

I was a little excited, and asked rhetorically: "I don't control you, cohabitation is a big deal, and mutual understanding and concessions should be made." Do you think I'm bothering you because I don't like you and think you're wrong?

Lin Yan also raised her voice: "I'm Xi used to living my own life, you love to accept it or not, but don't point fingers." I know my own business, so you don't have to worry about it.

I think you just don't like me, and then you think I'm wrong!”

How can you be so vexatious?"I said emotionally, "You've changed, and the way you are lazy all day makes me feel uncomfortable." I don't control you, I just care about your health, why are you so disgusted?

I am who I am, and I can do whatever I want. Lin Yan responded indifferently, "If you can't accept it, then break up, who rarely lives with you?"Hearing her say this, I became even more angry: "Lin Yan, it was you who proposed to break up, and now you want to break up again, what do you think of me?"

Is it just a toy that you can manipulate at will?"So what do you think of me?Do you have a concubine?Lin Yan also retorted loudly. I was so angry that I went straight back to my room and slammed the door.

Lin Yan was still shouting loudly outside, but I couldn't listen to a word. There are more and more quarrels like this, and the contradictions between me and Lin Yan are getting deeper and deeper. She went her own way all day, completely ignoring my feelings.

I really don't understand why she became like this after living together when we had such a good relationship before. One day, I came home from work and as soon as I opened the door, I smelled a puff of smoke.

I immediately got nervous and hurried to the room to check if it was **. When I opened the door, I saw Lin Yan actually smoking in the room, there were cigarette butts on the ground, the windows were not open, and the whole room was full of smoke.

Lin Yan, it's okay if you smoke at home, why do you smoke in the room?It's going to blacken the house!I said anxiously.

Lin Yan sat on the edge of the bed, still holding a cigarette in her hand, and said with a leisurely expression: "You are too lenient, didn't you see me changing clothes in the room?"I'm happy to smoke here, does it have anything to do with you??

Only then did I realize that she only had underwear left on her upper body, and her pants were halfway off, piled up on the bed. "yes, can't you?Lin Yan said confidently, "Anyway, you've seen it, what's the matter."

Aren't you living together every day now, don't worry too much!"You're going too far!I said angrily, "I'm too lenient."It's you who have gone too far!I'm so good to you, you don't want to be like this!

Lin Yan snorted disdainfully: "Am I excessive?."I don't want my face anymore?It's too unproductive for a big man to say such a thing!You think you're good to me, and I should be grateful to Dade for being at your mercy?

Wake up!I was almost angry: "Lin Yan, you are too much!".We clearly said that we would respect each other, why didn't you talk about it at all?It's only been a few days since you've been living together, and you've treated me like this?

Lin Yan rolled her eyes and said, "Oh, aren't you annoyed!."It's long-winded every day, you can be my foil if you want to, don't try to control my life!

If you are not satisfied, you can break up, and this little thing is quarreled like this, it is endless!Lin Yan interrupted me impatiently: "I've heard enough of what you said, you just keep nagging, I'm going to the house!."

After saying that, she shook her hand and entered the back room, slamming the door open.

I stood still, breathing deeply, trying to calm the anger burning within. Lin Yan's attitude and behavior really made it difficult for me to understand, and I couldn't understand why she suddenly became the same person as before, and had no respect for me.

At this time, I suddenly realized that the root of the problem may not be entirely with Lin Yan, maybe it is more of my own problem. I calmed down and thought about it, and realized that I might indeed be too strict and demanding.

Originally, we were both old people who had lived alone for many years, each with our own living Xi, and after living together, I thought that I should coordinate with each other and reduce unnecessary conflicts, so I asked Lin Yan to change herself to suit me in many things.

Although my intentions were good, for Lin Yan, it may really give her a feeling of being over-regulated. Thinking of this, I can't help but feel a little guilty of myself. Lin Yan has always been a free and loose character, but it is too unfair for her to ask her to accommodate me unconditionally.

I forgot that loving someone should not be about planning the other person's life, but about giving the other person space to be the best version of himself. After calming down, I decided to take the initiative to apologize to Lin Yan.

I came to the back room and knocked on the door: "Swallow, it's me, can we come out and talk?"Lin Yan opened the door, and there was still anger on her face: "What is there to talk about, isn't it all open?"

I said sincerely, "Swallow, I'm sorry that I've been bothering you. I've been so you that I've forgotten how you feel. In fact, you can live as freely as before, and you don't have to do what I want.

I am willing to give you the most space to choose again, and I will no longer ask you to change anything. Lin Yan seemed a little surprised, was silent for a while, and said, "Then don't you want to take care of my life, do you have to let me do this and that?"”

I shook my head and said, "I was wrong, I shouldn't have tried to plan your life." Cohabitation is two separate individuals living together, rather than asking me to arrange your life.

I'm so a**, I'm sorry. Lin Yan finally relieved herself and said, "It's not your fault, it's me who went too far." When I first moved in, I wanted to take care of each other, but then I felt that you interfered too much with me, and I was disgusted.

I should tell you how I feel, not just against you. I said, "We all have a responsibility." But from now on, I'll respect your freedom, and you'll tell me what you think, okay?

Lin Yan smiled and said, "Okay, I'll pay attention." Actually, I want to understand you too, but sometimes the way you express me makes me feel uncomfortable. But I know you have good intentions, and I will tell you later that I will not lose my temper directly. ”

I am very pleased with Lin Yan's words. We were finally able to talk calmly, which was very important to re-establish understanding. Since then, I have learned to give Lin Yan more respect and space and no longer ask her to adapt to my lifestyle.

I'll listen to her, not just say no. Even if I disagree with some of her practices, I will express them gently, rather than forcefully asking her to change. Lin Yan also really noticed that she didn't dress up too exaggerated in front of me.

She will also control her smoking to a moderate amount, and will open the window for ventilation. Sometimes when I go home, she hasn't gotten up yet, and I don't deliberately wake her up so she can wake up naturally. I found that giving Lin Yan more respect made our relationship more harmonious.

She also began to take the initiative to understand my feelings and stopped going her own way. In many small things, she would think first about whether it would make it difficult for me.

Once, when I came back from a late night from work, I was very tired, and she had asked a friend to come to her house for a party, but when she saw me coming back, she took the initiative to change it to go outside. I understood that she didn't want to disturb my rest, and my heart was full of gratitude.

After reconciling, I found that Lin Yan and I still have a deep fate. We started dating each other like lovers, strolling, watching movies, visiting the garden, and it felt like we were back in time when we first met.

One night, we were sitting on the balcony watching the night view, and Lin Yan leaned on my shoulder. "Swallow, thank you for your understanding and forgiveness during this time. I whispered. I shook her hand: "To love someone is to accept her truest self."

We are all learning Xi process, and there is still a long way to go. With you by my side, I will no longer be afraid of the road ahead. There were tears of emotion in Lin Yan's eyes, she nodded, and kissed me lightly on the face.

At this moment, I suddenly understood that love needs tolerance, time, and understanding;But in the end, it can make us the best version of ourselves. The story of Lin Yan and me may be a process of growing up with love.

Looking back on this time, I no longer have resentment, only a sincere and peaceful heart.

I no longer plan Lin Yan's life, but give her the greatest freedom. At first I was worried about whether she would go back to her old ways, but I was relieved that she had become more responsible.

For example, when I go home to rest after the night shift, Lin Yan will be very light-hearted, not watching TV, or even cooking, for fear of waking me up. When I woke up, I found that she hadn't eaten all day, and I was touched and distressed.

Swallow, you don't eat or wake me up, it's too hard for you. I said. Lin Yan smiled and said, "I see that you are so tired, I really can't bear to disturb you." I'm not a kid, so it's okay to skip a meal. The most important thing is that you get enough sleep. ”

I held her hand and said, "You don't have to do this in the future, you treat your home as your own, and you don't need to take care of me so much." We are family, not polite. ”

Lin Yan nodded and said, "I know, I'll pay attention to it in the future." But you also have to know that I am not doing this because I think you are bothering me, but because I care about you. I really call this my home now. ”

I was very touched and hugged Lin Yan. I understand that her thoughtfulness comes from the heart, which is more valuable than anything else. Another time, Lin Yan's son wanted to come to see her, and originally proposed to let him stay in a hotel, but Lin Yan said that there were many empty rooms at home, so he could live in it.

I knew her son didn't like me very much, but I agreed.

I didn't expect Lin Yan's son to be so enthusiastic about me and keep calling me uncle. He stayed for two days, was well-behaved, didn't smoke, and ate every meal with us. Brought me a gift when I left.

I said to Lin Yan with some surprise, "Why is your son so good to me this time?."Didn't you have a cold face when you saw me before?Lin Yan smiled and said: "Maybe he saw that we had such a good relationship, and his opinion changed."

When I mentioned you to him, it was all good things, and he knew that you were good to me, so he accepted you. "I understand that Lin Yan must have said a lot of good things about me in front of my son, and I was not only moved, but also admired her generosity very much.

This is true love. I also began to take the initiative to take care of Lin Yan's life. She likes to eat my meals at home, so I study all kinds of dishes;She didn't have a good leg and foot, so I picked her up for physiotherapy.

I no longer accept her care unilaterally, but repay her as best I can. One day, Lin Yan suddenly said to me: "Daming, it's inconvenient for us to eat out after we retire, why don't you teach me to cook a few specialty dishes?"

Learn to help you share the cooking chores. I readily agreed. Although Lin Yan is not good at cooking, she is willing to share the housework for me, and I am very touched. I have to say that Lin Yan learns things very quickly, I taught a few dishes, and she quickly became proficient.

Once when I came home from a long shift, she had already prepared a few dishes and was waiting for me, and she also stewed chicken soup. After I finished eating, I praised Lin Yan again and again, and Lin Yan was very happy.

My friendship with Lin Yan grew stronger and stronger, and she became an integral part of my life. We will share each other's joys and sorrows, listen to each other, and support each other.

I often wonder how many more precious moments like this can I have in my lifeLin Yan and I have found each other's truest existence, and perhaps only in old age will we truly understand the true meaning of life.

The life we have experienced together has made me cherish every minute and every second with Lin Yan even more. I have lived alone for many years, and now that I have a close partner, I realize that life can be so beautiful.

We go shopping at the supermarket together, walk in the park together, do chores together. We would chat on weeknights and go out to dinner and watch movies together on weekends. I used to worry that I would lose my freedom by living together, but now I find that with Lin Yan by my side, my life has become much richer.

Lin Yan is no longer a passive person who accepts care, and she has also begun to take care of me to the best of her ability. Every morning, she would prepare a hearty breakfast for me, and in the evening I would have a hot meal when I came back from overtime.

Looking at her busy figure, my heart is filled with gratitude and warmth. I've come to realize that giving and receiving are just as important in a relationship. To love someone, not only to do things for her, but also to let her do things for you so that she will feel needed.

Lin Yan and I have found this balance, which is the foundation of our long-term relationship. I know that Lin Yan also regards me as the most important person in her life.

Every time I got sick or in trouble, she would be anxious like an ant on a hot pan. I often joke that she can stop my longevity insurance so that Lin Yan seriously said that she will be responsible for what I have in the future.

Looking at her serious appearance, my heart was full of emotion and warmth.

I praise Lin Yan's braised pork ribs for being more delicious than my mother's. But she said seriously: "This dish is exactly the taste you remember, in order to let you taste the taste that your mother made for you when you were a child."

I'm sure she's doing a lot better than I do. I listened, my nose was sore, and I hugged Lin Yan tightly. I know that she is the person I know best in this world.

In life, if you don't have a confidant to accompany you by the age of 60, you may look back on the past and leave regrets. I am very fortunate that God has blessed me with Lin Yan. With her, my life became full.

Sometimes I see Lin Yan busy alone, and my heart will be full of love. Actually, I don't need much, as long as she's there, I'm satisfied. The rest of my life is long, but with her, I have nothing to fear.

The rest of my life is long and the road is long, but I know that there is no longer loneliness ahead, because I will finally be married to you. After two years of falling in love with Lin Yan, I decided to propose to her, and these days, she has brought me unprecedented joy, and I finally found out that there is another person in this world who has a heart and soul with me.

Swallow, you have made me feel happiness that I have never felt before, and the time spent with you is the most precious memory of my life. I feel very lucky to have met you.

Will you marry me?Let me stay with you for the rest of your life, okay?I said lovingly. Lin Yan was so excited that she couldn't speak, and tears came out of her eyes. She nodded in agreement and held out her hand for me to put a ring on her.

Daming, of course I do!She finally wiped away her tears and said, "I am the luckiest thing in my life to meet you." I feel very honored to marry you, and living with you is the greatest wish of my life!

I was so touched that I shook her hand and said, "Swallow, thank you for accepting me and letting me accompany you through the years to come." I will always love you, respect you, and understand you.

You are the most important companion in my life. ”

Lin Yan looked at me with a smile, holding my hand tightly, tears of happiness flashing in her eyes. Our marriage contract was confirmed. She excitedly called her children and shared this joy, and everyone was happy for her.

I also called my daughter**, and she excitedly said that finally someone could take care of me, and also congratulated Aunt Lin on becoming her mother. After getting engaged, our lives were sweet and harmonious.

Lin Yan began to prepare the dowry and did a lot of her manual work. I was busy helping her with her registration and welcoming her into my home. In her speech, Lin Yan said: "Husband and wife are in charge, and we will always be together.

The people on the scene were happy with our happiness. I know that getting married with her is the right decision in my life. After we got married, we started our life as a couple.

Every morning, we would make breakfast and chat togetherWhen I came home in the evening, I had a hot meal. Lin Yan learned many new skills and took care of my food, clothing and daily life.

I also tried my best to help her, share the housework, and accompany her for walks and shopping. Although there will be small quarrels in married life, we quickly reconciled. Because we understand that those who love each other need to learn Xi tolerance, forbearance, and forgiveness.

This makes our feelings stronger, like tempered gold, shining brightly. With Lin Yan by my side, my life has become complete and happy. We'll grow old together and then die hand in hand, and that's my ideal love process.

Although the story of Lin Yan and I is plain, it is full of deep emotion. Love takes time to precipitate and understanding to sublimate, but in the end it can go through the ups and downs of life and connect two hearts forever.

Lin Yan's married life with me is full of sweetness and happiness. We do a lot of things together every day, such as walking, shopping, doing chores, and also caring for and caring for each other.

Lin Yan is a very considerate person, she takes care of my life in an orderly manner, and the dishes she cooks are delicious. She also learned to grow flowers and fish to make our little yard very beautiful.

I love her efforts and try my best to share the chores, chatting with her, going for walks, and even helping her with cooking, sweeping the floor, and doing laundry. Lin Yan said that I am her most intimate wife, and I also feel very happy.

Although we are both old people, we are still as loving as a young couple. Sometimes I would jokingly call her my "little wife" and she would grin and say she liked it.

I also give her small surprises, such as secretly ordering a bouquet to put at home on her birthday and taking her to a fancy restaurant to celebratePrepare and decorate your room for Valentine's Day.

I would be very satisfied to see her happy. Lin Yan also cares about my body and often makes me some supplements. When I have a bad stomach, it hurts, so she will study various ways to nourish my stomach.

When I have a cold and fever, she will stay in front of my bed, like a **. I joked that she was about to become "Dr. Moore" and she laughed and said it was her pleasure to do this for me.

One day, Uncle Wang, a neighbor, suddenly fainted and was sent to the hospital, and the child was not around. Lin Yan and I volunteered to help take care of him, and we took turns staying in the hospital day and night, helping Uncle Wang wipe his body, get water, and get infusions.

Uncle Wang was very touched and took the initiative to come to our house to express his gratitude after being discharged from the hospital. We had a hearty meal together that day, and Uncle Wang repeatedly said that he would not hesitate to look for him if he needed anything in the future.

After seeing Uncle Wang away, I said to Lin Yan, "We will help others more in the future, this feeling is very good." Lin Yan smiled and nodded, her eyes shining with warmth.

As the years go by, the children all start families, and we seem to have a lot less time. However, Lin Yan and I don't feel alone because we have each other. In the evenings, we would share interesting stories and I would take her to wash up and rest.

She laughed at me as her "nanny", and I thought of myself as the most conscientious "nanny". We looked at the wrinkles on each other's faces, but our hearts were more in love than ever. I know that for the rest of my life, I am no longer alone.

Now, we are all entering old age and have limited mobility. But we still take a walk around the neighborhood, feed the pigeons, and look at the flowers. As long as there is sunshine and blue sky, every day is beautiful.

Uncle Zhang, a neighbor, said that Lin Yan and I were the most loving old husband and wife he had ever met. I laughed and said that our story was unremarkable, but full of genuine love. Some love, after years of precipitation, will only be more mellow and heavy.

On the road of life, the most precious thing is a confidant who accompanies you. I am very glad that God gave me this gift of Lin Yan. With her for the rest of my life, I have nothing more to ask for. Love, it turns out, can be so long, so sweet.

When Lin Yan and I stood in the shallow sunset, we held each other's wrinkled hands, and our hearts were full of gratitude, happiness and steadfastness.

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