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The opposite sex should make a promise in this world to "be together" and "be the one you love each other the most", focus on life in the moment, and live faithfully according to your choices. Well, that's the right thing to do.
No matter what you say or do, you need to think about each other, think about the relationship, do things practically, and improve each other's quality of life so that you both can live a good life. "Living together. ”
Not understanding these things, holding unrealistic ideas, doing things that should not be done, saying things that should not be said, neither promoting the development of the relationship between the two people, nor improving their own lives, is putting the cart before the horse. Horse. 。Since two people decide to live together, it is necessary to understand that when the opposite sex becomes friends, no matter how deep or shallow, there are three things that rot in their stomachs.
1.Past relationships.
Since the two of you have decided to live together, it's time to let go of your past feelings. No matter how memorable your love affair with your ex is, it's all in the past. It's okay to remind yourself from time to time, but don't express your feelings. "Aftertaste" and "nostalgia" can be embarrassing for the other person.
At the same time, even if you are interested in the other person's past relationship, don't ask about it and let the other person slowly forget the past.
If you don't understand this, you'll always talk about past relationships. When in contact with other people or with ex-lovers, this tends to disrupt the emotional development of the two and can also cause problems for couples. When boring worries are added, it often ends up causing cracks in the relationship.
2. You are dissatisfied with your partner and have thoughts of breaking up.
Love is a kind of appreciation and acceptance. When we discover each other's strengths, we sincerely appreciate them, and when we discover each other's shortcomings, we actively choose to tolerate and accept.
If the other person has harmless shortcomings, try to be tolerant. If you can't stand it, you can express your opinion, but don't force the other person to change, because it is difficult to get a good result. If you force it, it's best to let the other person solve it. If not, you can't solve it, either leave or accept. It's better not to kidnap each other with "love" anymore, and don't criticize each other from the moral high ground. Because you are together to live together, not to make someone else's life more miserable.
You can have an opinion about the other person, you can defend your point of view, but try not to hold a grudge against the other person, talk about your dissatisfaction with the other person often, and don't force the word "break up". This is not a solution. The right attitude towards issues often leads to new problems that lead to miserable lives for both of you.
3.Unrealistic "requirements".
When getting along with someone of the opposite sex, it is okay to have expectations and requirements for the other person, but only if these expectations and requirements are realistic and can be met by the other person.
It's best not to make unrealistic demands. Maybe you have higher expectations for your partner, want them to give you better, are willing to accept your requests in the name of true love, and you make some demands on the other person in the hope that they will give you something. But because you ask for more than he minimum, or far beyond what he can do, he may feel heartbroken, stressed, suffocated, and eventually run away from you. It's gendered.
If you don't want such an outcome, don't make unrealistic "demands" in your dealings with the opposite sex. If you say that, the other person can't do it, and you may hurt them. You and your relationship. Why bother?Eventually, you will fall into the abyss of pain.