After the daughter-in-law gives birth to a child, the mother-in-law should respect and support the daughter-in-law's decision in the child's upbringing. Although the mother-in-law may have a concerned heart and wants the child to receive the best possible care, the daughter-in-law should respect her child's needs and decisions. The mother-in-law should be aware that the daughter-in-law is the biological mother of the child and she has a deeper understanding of the child's needs. For example, when it comes to feeding, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law may have different opinions. The mother-in-law may think that breast milk is the best way to feed, while the daughter-in-law may choose milk powder due to her own physical condition or personal feeding Xi. The mother-in-law should understand and respect the daughter-in-law's decision, and do not quarrel with the daughter-in-law because of these things and destroy the relationship between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law. Instead, we should accept new ideas with an open mind and respect the choices of our daughter-in-law.
In addition, the mother-in-law should not impose her own suggestions and opinions on the daughter-in-law. Every mother has her own unique understanding and love for her child. The mother-in-law should respect her daughter-in-law's decisions regarding the child's education and give her enough space and support to develop her own parenting style. The mother is the closest person to the child, and the relationship between them is irreplaceable. The mother-in-law should understand this and give appropriate help and support when necessary, rather than interfering and controlling too much.
The mother-in-law should be aware that controlling and interfering in the child's upbringing alone is not conducive to the development of the relationship between the daughter-in-law and the child. The daughter-in-law is the biological mother of the child, and there is a unique bond and affection between them. Mother-in-law should be able to let go of excessive concern for grandchildren and give more freedom and space to daughters-in-law and children to establish an independent parent-child relationship. At the same time, the mother-in-law should also learn to help in moderation and not put too much pressure on the daughter-in-law.
When a daughter-in-law does not choose to ask her mother-in-law to help take care of the child, the mother-in-law should maintain an open and understanding attitude. The daughter-in-law chooses to ask someone else to take care of the children, not because she doesn't trust her mother-in-law, but because she wants to be able to take care of the children herself, or because she has found a more suitable babysitter. The mother-in-law should understand and respect the daughter-in-law's choice, and give her enough space and support.
There are many benefits to mother-in-law not taking care of the third generation. First of all, the mother-in-law can enjoy the freedom to continue living the life she wants. Secondly, the mother-in-law can reduce the conflict with the daughter-in-law. Not interfering in the daughter-in-law's child-rearing decisions can avoid quarrels and conflicts caused by different opinions on raising children. In the end, the mother-in-law was relieved of the hard work of taking care of the children. Mother-in-law, who is already in her fifties and sixties, can be very difficult to take care of children, especially in modern society, taking care of children is not only to meet the basic needs of life, but also to take on the responsibility of education, cultivation and imparting cultural knowledge. Therefore, it is good for the mother-in-law not to take care of the third generation.
Mother-in-law should not feel heartache and loss for not taking care of her grandchildren. Although the mother-in-law feels sorry for her son and children, the son has already formed his own family, and when the son gets married, the mother-in-law must learn to let go and respect the daughter-in-law's decision-making. The relationship between mother and child, father and son, is mutual, but the choices and decisions of adult children are out of the control of their parents, and they need the freedom and space to explore and build their own lives. The mother-in-law should understand this and avoid interfering in her son's family life because she cares too much.
When a daughter-in-law does not find a job or chooses to take care of the children at home, the mother-in-law should maintain a moderate level of intervention and care. Although the daughter-in-law chooses to take care of the children on her own, the mother-in-law can provide some advice and help. The mother-in-law can be concerned about whether the daughter-in-law has psychological pressure and physical burden, and whether she needs some help and support. If the daughter-in-law needs to find a job, the mother-in-law can provide some help and support, such as providing some advice, helping to find employment opportunities, etc. At the same time, the mother-in-law should also respect the daughter-in-law's choice, and do not interfere and criticize the daughter-in-law's decision-making.
The mother-in-law should understand that after her son gets married, there will be different divisions of labor and roles in their lives. Men are more financially responsible, while women are more responsible for the care of the family and children. This division of labor is the result of mutual consultation and decision between husband and wife, and there should be no pressure or blame for the daughter-in-law's non-work. After all, both men and women should share and support their financial burdens and family responsibilities.
At the same time, the mother-in-law should also learn to let go and not interfere too much in the decision-making and choices of her son and daughter-in-law. Adult children have their own rights to live and make choices, and mothers-in-law should respect and support their decision-making and avoid ruining family relationships by interfering too much. The son has formed his own family, and they need to manage their lives independently and autonomously, and the role of the mother-in-law should be to provide help and support, rather than constantly interfering and intervening.