My husband Xiaobao and I met in college, both majoring in computer science. At that time, we were both otaku and otaku, and we liked to soak in the computer room to program, and occasionally went to the library to study. We were like-minded, and soon sparks of love collided.
After graduating from college, we both got jobs at an internet company. Although we are busy at work, we stick to our weekly appointments. Two years later, Xiaobao proposed to me. He knelt in the hotel, held the ring and said, "Xiaoqing, I want to spend my life with you, are you willing to marry me?"I said excitedly!”
After getting married, the two of us lived an ordinary but happy life. I continued to work at my old company, while Xiaobao moved to a start-up company, and although the time was more tight, the monthly salary reached 8,000 yuan. We don't have kids but have a lovely cat.
Just three years after we got married, Xiaobao's younger brother Xiaolong came to the door. Xiaolong is 3 years younger than Xiaobao and is the youngest brother in the family. He didn't like to study very much and dropped out of college. Over the years, he has worked as a temporary worker, and his financial situation has not been very good.
That night, Xiaolong suddenly came to our house and told Xiaobao that he had decided to buy a house and get married. However, I don't have enough money on hand, and I hope Xiaobao can help with the down payment and monthly payment. I was surprised when I heard it, Xiaobao immediately agreed, saying that he would give Xiaolong 2,000 yuan a month.
Later, after Xiaolong left, I asked Xiaobao, "Is it really appropriate for you to agree like this?"We don't have a lot of savings, and your brother wasn't very reliable before. ”
Xiaobao said: "It's time for my younger brother to start a family. He looks serious this time and I'm sure he'll change. As an older brother, I should help him. ”
I said, "However, you only have a salary of 8,000 yuan now, deducting the social security provident fund, and you can get 6,000 in your hand." If you give him another 2,000, won't there be 4,000 left?It also costs a lot of money for household and daily expenses. ”
I still mind when I hear Xiaobao say this. I calculated the household and daily expenses, and it is true that if there is only 4,000 yuan left, it will be very stressful.
My dear, we have just gotten married, and our economic foundation is not yet solid. You just promised my brother 2,000, I think it's a bit rushed. Why don't we think about it again?I tried to persuade.
I'm in charge of my money, so don't worry about it. My brother and I know that he will definitely not fail me again this time. Xiaobao seemed a little impatient.
But after all, we are husband and wife, and economic matters should be discussed and decided. You can't just make a promise, right? "I'm in a bit of a hurry.
The money I gave my brother was taken from my own salary of 8,000, and it has nothing to do with you. I promised my brother that it was my family duty, so you should not interfere. Xiaobao's tone hardened.
Seeing him like this, I feel very sad. We've been married for three years, so why does he still have this attitude?Does he think I should listen to him and have no right to speak?
In the days that followed, I carefully observed my husband's condition. After his monthly salary arrived, he transferred 2,000 yuan to Xiaolong. Our living expenses have also become strained, and I can only save as much as possible to make ends meet.
One day, I couldn't help but ask Xiaobao: "Didn't you say that the salary is 8,000 yuan, why do we have less living expenses?".Could it be that you actually only got a salary of 6,000 yuan, but you said it was 8,000 yuan, right?”
Xiaobao's face sank: "I said that I am in charge of my own money, and it has nothing to do with you!."Do you believe me or not?”
Of course I believe you, but I just think that we are a family after all, and we should know each other's economic situation. "I still tried to communicate.
There are some things that you don't need to ask. The money I gave my brother, I said it was my own, it must be my own!Xiaobao's tone was tough.
One day, I plucked up the courage to talk to Xiaolong: "Xiaolong, I heard that you want to buy a house and get married, and you need money, so let your brother give you 2,000 yuan a month?."”
But I see that your life is still the same as before, often having fun outside and spending lavishly. I spoke up with my doubts.
Xiaolong's face was a little ugly: "I don't need you to ask how my life is." My brother himself promised to sponsor me, so don't meddle in our brother's affairs. ”
Looking at his appearance, I am even more convinced that he is calculating Xiaobao. I told Xiaobao about the results of my investigation and advised him to stop funding Xiaolong. But Xiaobao was very angry:
How can you secretly investigate my brother?You're interfering in our family's affairs!”
I'm here for your own good, to find out the truth. Your brother is obviously lying to you!I said anxiously.
I know my brother and he is really going through a difficult situation right now and needs my support. Don't meddle!"Xiaobao has a tough attitude.
But you've changed, worrying about your brother all day long, but you don't take me seriously. It's our feelings that matter most. "I couldn't help but redden.
Xiaobao is still stubborn: "I have to help my brother, it's my responsibility." If you interfere like this again, we can only get a divorce!”
I was stung by his last words, and tears welled up in my eyes: "Okay, since you care more about your brother, then let's divorce!."”
I immediately packed my bags and moved to my mother's house. Seeing this, Xiaobao panicked, knelt on the ground and begged me to go back, saying that he would listen to me from now on and would not give Xiaolong any more money.
Later, I gradually calmed down and began to reflect on the marriage. I think back to the sweetness of our first marriage, and I think that divorce may have been a hasty decision.
One day, I took the initiative to talk to Xiaolong to find out his true situation.
Xiaolong, can we talk about it alone?I want to find out, do you need money?I tried to speak as gently as I could.
Xiaolong didn't get excited this time, but sighed: "I said before that I might have lied to you and my brother when I bought a house. In fact, I have been living in a very tight situation, I have a lot of debts, my brother has recently been seriously ill, and I urgently need money for medical treatment and debt repayment. ”
Hearing him say this, I also understood his difficult situation: "Why don't you just tell your brother the truth?".Secretly calculating will not solve the problem. ”
I don't want him to see me as a failure. I can only lie to him, I did it wrong, I'm sorry. Xiaolong seemed to feel guilty.
I thought for a while: "You better tell your brother honestly, brothers still have to trust each other." I'll find a way to convince him. ”
Later, Xiaolong told Xiaobao the truth. Xiaobao also understood his brother's difficulties and decided to continue to support him.
That night, Xiaobao came to me and sincerely apologized to me: "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have unilaterally decided to sponsor my brother, and I shouldn't have ignored your feelings. I figured it out, you're the most important person to me. Let's not get a divorce, okay?”
Since then, Xiaobao has learned to discuss family matters with me. Our relationship has become stronger as a result. This incident taught me that mutual understanding is the key to maintaining a marriage. Now that we've gotten through this storm, our lives are back on track.
After this incident, I have a new understanding of both my husband and Xiaolong.
One day, I took the initiative to chat with Xiaolong to learn more about his situation.
Xiaolong, is your brother's illness cured?Are you doing well?I asked with concern.
Thank you for your concern. My brother has basically recovered, and it has cost him a lot of money to treat him during this time, thanks to my brother's support, otherwise I really don't know what to do. Xiaolong said.
You also have to take care of your body. If it's really difficult, tell us, don't always think about carrying it yourself. I persuaded him.
Well, I see. Actually, I've always been grateful to my brother, he's been really nice to me. I feel so guilty for causing him and you so much trouble this time. Xiaolong seemed to blame himself.
Don't blame yourself. Family members should care for each other and help each other. As long as you correct your previous mistakes, work and live well, you will definitely be able to start a family in the future. I encouraged.
Thank you, I will definitely correct it. In the future, if I have difficulties, I will take the initiative to discuss with my brother and will not hide it from him anymore. Xiaolong nodded.
This experience made me see Xiaolong's inner struggle, and I also understood my husband's intention to fund him.
That night, I had a frank chat with my husband: "Honey, I figured it out, you are sponsoring Xiaolong out of brotherly love, and I shouldn't stop it." It's just that we have to give priority to our own family after all, and the salary you said about 8,000 yuan has become 6,000 yuan, which has really affected family expenses, and I still hope you can understand me. ”
The husband nodded: "You're right, I will put family expenses first in the future, and I will discuss such things with you." I've worried you, and I can understand your anxiety. Let's take our time and be considerate of each other is the key. ”
I was relieved to see my husband's maturity. After this turmoil, our relationship has become closer and closer, and it has also laid the foundation for future life.