Autumn and Winter Check-in Challenge
1.Be recognized by others.
The adult thinking is that whether I do it or not is my business, and it is your problem whether you agree or not. Only when we are a child of a parent and a student as a teacher, we need to get their permission and consent, because we don't have our own resources and need them to provide but as an adult, you start to have your own financial income and means of livelihood, but you are still firmly blocked by the thinking of "need to be recognized by others" to block all your actions.
2.Present yourself as a victim.
It's all your fault that I'm like this'The subtext of this sentence is that you don't have any power to resist, you can only passively accept that adults will choose to fight back when they are threatened, even when animals in nature are threatened. will defend itself. There is only one exception, and that is the fear that a counterattack will lead to greater retaliation, but the truth is that to compromise is to tell others that it is okay to do so, and that only by counterattacking can we win equality, respect, and true peace.
3.I always feel wronged.
Feeling aggrieved is generally because you expect the other party to see or give back to your efforts, and you are not satisfied. This is also a kind of child's thinking, because the purpose of all your actions is not for yourself, but for the other party, this kind of thinking will inevitably bring disappointment and adults are what I want, I go directly to fight for it, I can't fight for it, I also admit it.
4.Explain to other people without stopping.
When others point out problems and make suggestions to him, he will subconsciously explain. The purpose of this is to tell the other party that there is a reason why I didn't do a good job, these problems are caused by others, and he can't accept that he has problems, essentially because he is still a child, his heart is not strong enough, he does not have a solid and solid self, and he can't withstand the criticism and advice of others, and adults are, you are right, just help me find out.
5.will not be responsible for themselves.
The most typical manifestations are self-harm and suicide. They don't realize that they are an independent person, they don't realize the preciousness of their own life, and they don't imagine their future wonderful life, but they see themselves as part of their parents. Because I hate them, I want to use self-harm and suicide. This is the most extreme example of the pain and sadness that it brings to them, and in reality, there are all kinds of ways to punish others by punishing themselves, which are all manifestations of not being responsible for themselves.
6.Complaining that others misunderstood him.
In The Godfather, the old godfather Don Corleone, teaches his son that you should never let people know what you are thinking, adults see actions and results, and only children care if they are misunderstood. Because only children can't accept that you are different from what I think, this is also "symbiosis" to a certain extent, and one day in the face of differences, the heart will be anxious, and only mature adults can seek common ground while reserving differences. Only then can we achieve "gentlemen are harmonious but different".
7.Find someone to judge.
When someone is willing to listen, they will spend a lot of space to "accuse" the other party of how they are not "moral", the purpose is to let the other party judge and prove that they are innocent. Just like children who complain to their parents and teachers, their way of solving the problem is not that I need to change, but that since it is he who is wrong, then you will help me to uphold justice Parents and teachers who truly understand education will not participate in children's games and disputes at will, but teach children to change their own ways of coping to face their own problems, which is also growing in itself.