My name is Zhang Xiaoming, and I am 50 years old this year, but I am still a single. Speaking of the fact that I have not yet married, I have to start from when I was young.
I was hit hard by Li Yan's sudden departure, and my whole person changed. Since then, I have been sensitive and hesitant about relationships and marriage. I felt that marriages were fragile and could break down at any time. So over the years, although I have had several girlfriends, I have never considered getting married.
After more than 20 years, my family saw that I was lonely all day long, and began to introduce me to blind dates. Faced with the urging of my parents, I also had to go on a blind date. But I still have the idea of trying to get married, because I think the marriage relationship is too important, and I have to live together for a period of time to accumulate some emotional foundation before thinking about getting married.
I hesitated for a moment, but still put forward my thoughts: "Liu Mei, I know that as a man, my request may be a bit abrupt. But I hope that if we go well, we can try to get married and live together for a period of time, and then officially register the marriage when the emotional foundation is good enough. Do you think this idea is okay?”
I hastened to say, "I know it's not easy for you to accept. But I've been through a lot, so I don't have enough faith in marriage. If we get married directly, in case there is a problem in the relationship, it will not be good for you and me. A trial marriage and cohabitation can give us time to get to know each other, and if we feel that it is really suitable, it is safer to officially enter into marriage. I'm not irresponsible, I just need a process to build trust. Can you think about it?”
Liu Mei was still hesitating, my mother saw her embarrassed appearance, and interjected: "Liu Mei, you just agree to come down, we Xiaoming really think about you." It's also normal to try to get married and live together, and it won't hurt your reputation. As long as you have a good relationship, it is a matter of time before you get married. ”
Auntie, I see what you mean. It's just that this decision was too sudden for me. Please give me a few days to think about it, can you?Liu Mei said.
Okay, okay, think about it. Mom said.
I saw that Liu Mei hadn't responded positively, so I had to leave. The blind date of the day broke up unhappily. On the way home, I was thinking that Liu Mei should be a very traditional woman, and it might be difficult to accept the idea of living together unmarried. It's like Li Yan I met when I was young, we couldn't agree on our ideas, and we had to break up in the end. I sighed, thinking that it was unlikely that this family business would succeed.
A few days later, my mother excitedly told me that Liu Mei had agreed to try marriage and live together. I was a little surprised and asked my mom how she decided. My mother said that Liu Mei had thought about it carefully and felt that my idea was reasonable, and she also wanted to know more about me before marriage. Although Liu Mei's parents did not agree, they also agreed to let her make her own decisions.
I watched Liu Mei put her skin care products and clothes one by one into all corners of the apartment, and my heart swelled with warmth that I had not felt for a long time. Living with another person, it was a new experience for me. I said sincerely: "Meimei, I feel very happy and satisfied to have you with me to start my life here. I've been waiting for this moment for a long, long time. ”
Liu Mei smiled and said, "Me too, Xiaoming." Together, we will make this place a cosy little home. ”
Over the next few days, Liu Mei and I adapted to living together. We went to the supermarket together to buy and discuss what kind of ingredients and daily necessities to buy. I found that Liu Mei is quite good at cooking, and her good home cooking made me taste the taste of my hometown.
I took the initiative to do most of the housework in the apartment, and took Liu Mei out to the movies and the park every week. Although there will inevitably be some small frictions in life, Liu Mei and I try our best to take care of each other and make life more satisfying. I believe that after such a cohabitation life, our relationship will definitely get better and better.
And just like that, we lived together for two months. At dinner that day, Liu Mei suddenly said: "Xiaoming, we have been living together for a while, and our relationship has further deepened. Why don't we consider officially registering our marriage, I think the time is ripe. ”
As soon as I heard this, my chopsticks fell to the ground. Getting married?So fast?I thought I would have to live together for at least half a year before we could talk about getting married.
Meimei, I think it's too early for us to get married. It's better to observe for a while, after all, two months is not enough to get to know a person. It will take me longer to adjust to family life, and it will affect me a lot if I get married now. I said tentatively.
Liu Mei's face immediately sank: "Xiaoming, I knew that you were still the one who was afraid of promises." We've been living together for two months, aren't we living well enough?What the hell are you running away from, am I a** not good enough?”
After all, you don't mean anything to me!Liu Mei interrupted me angrily, "Cohabitation is just your perfunctory means for me, you don't want to get married at all!."”
I was a little at a loss and wanted to explain a few words, but Liu Mei went back to the room directly and slammed the door.
It seems that this time, I messed up again. I know that Liu Mei's idea is right, and I shouldn't continue to run away, but the shadow in my heart makes me afraid of commitment. I looked at the closed door and fell into deep thought and self-reproach.
I sat in the living room all night, my mind full of self-blame. At dawn, I knocked lightly on Liu Mei's door, and when I saw that she didn't respond, I had no choice but to say to the door: "Meimei, I'm sorry, it's me who is not good and has evaded responsibility." You have reason to be mad at me. But I really need time to face marriage, so I hope you can forgive me and give me a chance to make amends. ”
After saying that, I went to work at the company. I was restless all day, worried that Liu Mei would pack up and leave directly. I finally stayed up until 6 o'clock in the evening to get off work, and I rushed home immediately, only to find that Liu Mei was not in the house, and some of her clothes had been cleaned up.
My heart sank, and she was gone. Just as I was in despair, the doorbell rang suddenly. When I opened the door, I saw Liu Mei with red eyes.
You're back!I said excitedly.
yes, I went to my sister's house for one night. I think I'll come back and talk to you. Liu Mei said.
I helped Liu Mei to sit down on the sofa and apologized to her deeply. I explained the changes I encountered when I was younger, the psychological shadows it gave me, and the idea that I wanted to slowly face the promise of marriage. In the end, I solemnly said to Liu Mei: "Give me a chance to prove myself, I will work hard to face it and move towards marriage with you." ”
After Liu Mei heard this, she nodded with red eyes: "Xiaoming, I understand your concerns now." But feelings are not child's play, and I also have my own considerations. It's okay to give you time, but you have to give me a satisfactory explanation. ”
Okay, you can ask for anything!I said.
Well, from today, you have to officially register your marriage with me within a year. In this year's time, you have to be sincere to me and let me feel your sincerity. After a year, if you still find various reasons to shirk it, we will break up. It's an ultimatum, you can make up your own mind. Liu Mei said.
I let out a long breath after listening to this, and then replied solemnly: "I promise to marry you within a year." During this period, I will prove myself with practical actions. Thank you for your accommodatingness, I will cherish this opportunity. ”
From that day on, I was determined to face my marriage and overcome the obstacles in my heart. I took the initiative to take on most of the housework at home and often took Liu Mei out for travel. In my life, I no longer put forward the idea of postponing my marriage, but actively discussed my life plan after marriage with Liu Mei.
At the same time, I was mentally prepared. I had an honest conversation with a psychiatrist to deal with the trauma of my youth. I realized that I couldn't let the past destroy the present and the future. Marriage requires courage, commitment, not evasion. I had to learn to trust my partner, not be defensive.
And just like that, a year passed quickly. This year I put in a lot of effort to prove myself. Finally, on the first anniversary of our cohabitation, I solemnly said to Liu Mei: "Meimei, thank you for waiting. I'm ready to start married life with you. I would like to be your lifelong partner. ”
Liu Mei looked at me with relief, with tears in her eyes: "Xiaoming, I see your changes." Let's go to the Civil Affairs Bureau. ”
When we came out of the Civil Affairs Bureau hand in hand, we were already legally married. I will never run away from marriage again because I have found a soulmate who is truly willing to spend my life with my hands. That night, we happily celebrated our wedding. I know that the future life will be even better.
In the days after we got married, Liu Mei and I lived happily. We would go shopping at the supermarket together and discuss what fresh ingredients to buy. Liu Mei will prepare our three meals carefully, and she will change her tricks to make the dishes I like to eat. In the evening, I will massage and relax Liu Mei's shoulders and neck, and we will snuggle up together to watch TV dramas.
On weekends we go for a walk in a nearby park and chat while enjoying the view of the sun on the grass and lake. Sometimes we would drive to small towns in the suburbs and try new things that we hadn't experienced before. Every little trip warms up our feelings.
Before we knew it, we had been married for a year. One day, Liu Mei said to me: "Xiaoming, our wedding anniversary is coming, let's celebrate it, shall we?"”
Okay, let's go on a trip, let's go on an island vacation, how about it?I proposed.
Great!I've never been to an island!Liu Mei said happily.
So, we booked an island resort, got our bags ready and set off.
When we arrived on the island, we were fascinated by the beautiful scenery. The turquoise sea, the golden sandy beaches, the tranquility of the holiday cottages, everything is so beautiful. We walked along the seashore, the waves crashing at our feet. Liu Mei happily played on the beach, like an energetic girl. Looking at her carefree appearance, my heart was also filled with joy.
At the resort, we indulge in massages, pools, and rides. In the evenings we would sit on the balcony of the holiday house and enjoy cocktails while feeling the sound of the waves. I snuggled up to Liu Mei, and she leaned on my arms.
Xiaoming, I feel very happy to have you accompany me to this beautiful place. Liu Mei said to me softly.
Me too, Mei Mei. This year you have given me great trust and made me rediscover the meaning of marriage. I will always love you and accompany you to old age. I kissed Liu Mei's forehead.
The sea breeze at night blows our figures snuggling up to each other. At this moment, I felt satisfaction and happiness that I had never felt in my life.