At what moment did you suddenly feel chills?
Example 1
Today, I had a big fight with my husband with a monthly salary of 40,000 yuan because of 5,000 yuan, and I am still in a cold war, which also made me wake up from my 11-year marriage, and my heart is sad and cold.
Early this morning, it was good to take the children out to play, after breakfast, we set off, a few days ago, we made a plan for the National Day, because I have not been back to my parents' house for two years, I let my husband choose, is the National Day or the Spring Festival back, he does not want to go to my house for the New Year, so I chose the National Day, I also gladly accepted.
On the way out, he asked me how much money I planned to give to my parents, and I asked his opinion, and he said, just buy some gifts, and then give 2,000, I said yes, and I plan to do the same.
He asked me again, "Will you give it back for the Spring Festival?"”
I said, "Of course, the Spring Festival is definitely going to be given." ”
He asked again, "How much?"”
I said, "Two or three thousand dollars." ”
When he heard this, he was immediately unhappy, and said: "You have been married for more than ten years, how can anyone still give it every year, your parents have not helped us anything, the family property has been given to the son, the National Day has been given, and the Spring Festival is almost a few hundred." ”
I said, "How can I get a few hundred, my parents didn't help me with anything, but they didn't trouble me anything, my dad lived in the hospital several times a year, we didn't look at it, we didn't give a dime, they didn't even tell us, my parents raised me so big, is it too much to pay a few thousand dollars a year?".Your parents are usually sick, and they buy insurance and take out 50,000 or 60,000 yuan at a time, I haven't said a word, your parents are parents, my parents are not?”
He immediately said very angrily: "You go and ask others, do you give so much, even if there is, the other two go to work, and I work alone in our family, can this be the same?"My parents are just one of my children, and everything will be left to me in the future, what can your parents bring us?You put all your thoughts on your mother's family, you don't think about our family at all, you give money every year, and other people's parents also give money to their daughters, and your family has nothing. ”
I'm fire "whoosh" I was not low, he asked me to take care of the children at home, saying that it was too expensive to hire a nanny, and I was not at ease, I compromised and made sacrifices, I was more eager to go to work than anyone else, in order to subsidize the family, I waited for the children to sleep every time, stayed up late to write, when the writing harvest was good, there were more than 10,000 a month, and the poor was one or two thousand, I took out all the money to subsidize the family, it was because I understood his hard work, I wanted to share, other women have private money, I was stupid, I didn't keep a penny, now, he said such chilling words, I was very uncomfortable, tears came out of my eyes, I felt that I saw the wrong person。
In all fairness, his monthly salary is 40,000 yuan, thousands of dollars is nothing, and I am spending the money I earn, he is very good to his parents, and he also asks me to be good to his parents, these years, no matter what he gives his parents, I will not have a second word, but he always accuses my parents of not helping him, unwilling to give my parents a penny, he didn't consider my feelings at all, I was originally married far away, I will only go back once a year or two, I just want to give them a little financial comfort within the scope of my ability, am I wrong?He actually said this about me, about my parents like this, I was desperate, I felt worthless for all these years of work, and I was disappointed in my marriage.
I threw my whole body and mind into the small family, he never paid his salary, I used to go to work, he said that I was not short of money, I have my own salary, later, said that I was afraid that I would subsidize my mother's family, these years, I don't even know how much savings my family has, and I have never asked him to hand over power, let alone interfere with him to spend money, as long as I earn a penny, it is spent at home, but he has such an evaluation, I am really sad.
I think of myself all these years, I have been at home, never went out to play alone for a day, when the two children were young, one big night after another, I survived by myself, I didn't even dare to buy clothes when I didn't make money, because I hated the days when the palms were up, I thought I was a good wife and mother, he and I have been married for eleven years, never cooked a meal for me, never mopped the floor once, washed a bowl, but, what I gained, my contribution he didn't see at all, and enjoyed it as a matter of course.
Now, for a few thousand dollars, he lost his temper with me, and was full of swearing, saying that my mother's family always wanted to squeeze him, and he didn't pay anything at all, so how could he squeeze him, in the final analysis, he was a selfish person.
Looking back over the years, even when I was sick and hospitalized, he never came to see me, preferring to go to the gym and play basketball after work.
When I was pregnant with my second child, I had to go to the hospital to regulate my blood sugar, I got up early and went through the admission procedures silently, he asked me if I wanted to come to see me, I said, if you are not available, forget it.
Actually, I hope he can come to accompany me, I am alone in the hospital, I have a lot of blood, I am very bored, I can't eat or sleep well, my body is very heavy in the third trimester, and I am depressed, but I am afraid that he will work too hard, so I say so.
Who knows, until he was discharged from the hospital, he didn't come once, I thought he was working overtime, but later I found out that in those days, he was playing basketball with his colleagues every night, and I asked him why he didn't come to see me, but he said that I didn't let him come.
It's ridiculous, this has become my vexatiousness, this has become a knot in my heart, whenever I think about it, I can't help but feel cold and disappointed, marriage, what's the point?
When the child was only a few months old, I had a severe cold, and I begged him to come back early and let me go to the emergency department, but after he agreed, he went to play basketball with his colleagues immediately after work, and came home at eight o'clock.
It is said that young couples are old companions, and I have not yet lost my self-care, so I treat them like this, I don't dare to imagine what will happen when I get old.
For so many years, he rarely gave me gifts, even if he did, it would not exceed three hundred yuan, I didn't value these, I just wanted him to care about me, even if it was just a little compassionate, but he didn't, he only had him and his family in his eyes.
For the sake of the child, I have persuaded myself countless times to be considerate of him and learn to adjust myself, but for the sake of thousands of dollars, he stabbed a knife in my heart and scolded my family, I didn't want to endure it, I was so cold that I collapsed.
I wanted to leave home countless times today and hide in a place where no one knew me, but I couldn't let go of my children, so I had to go back.
He seemed to think it was my fault, and he was still in the cold war, and I didn't have the intention of reconciling.
I don't want to compromise anymore, maybe, when the children are older, when they no longer need my protection, I will choose to leave silently, to a place where no one knows, to heal silently.
Example 2
My colleague's family bees gave me two jars of pure honey, and after I got it to the unit, everyone tasted it one after another, and formed a rule: add some honey every time I drink water.
One of my colleagues liked it very much after tasting it and immediately asked about the purchase channel. I told her that the honey came from a classmate's beekeeper, and that it was located deep in the mountains, in a pollution-free environment, and was naturally delicious.
She excitedly said, "Please tell your classmates that I want to buy a few pounds!."”
I agreed, thinking that it was a good thing, not only to help my classmates sell honey, but also to allow more people to taste this delicious product.
After informing her classmates, she readily agreed and said that because she was my friend, she could get a discount of 25 yuan per catty, while she generally sold it for 35 yuan outside, because her honey was very well-known in the local area, and the sales had been good.
After I told my colleague, she thought it was reasonable, so she placed an order for 20 pounds and was ready to distribute it to relatives and friends.
However, I feel a little embarrassed, worried that my classmates will lose money because the ** is too low. So I persuaded my colleague that my classmates gave my relatives and friends this price for the sake of my face, didn't you make her lose money by buying so much?Would you like to consider buying less, or just buy a little and try it yourself?
But the colleague did not relent, insisted on buying 20 catties, and said that he would give it to relatives and friends to taste.
I felt embarrassed, so I had to ask my classmates for advice again, and although they were a little embarrassed, they still said they were willing. As a result, the matter of honey mailing was also handled.
While waiting for the honey to arrive, my colleagues frequently urged my classmates to send it by courier when they were unable to come in person, and the postage was said to be quite expensive.
When I handed over the honey to my colleague, she looked a little embarrassed, and then said: "Actually, I saw freshly cut honey in the market yesterday, which is only 20 yuan a catty, and you can get a discount of 18 yuan a catty if you buy more. ”
When I heard this, I said angrily, "This honey is not ordinary honey, haven't you tasted it yourself?"The quality is definitely different. If you think so, why did you buy so much in the first place?Besides, people will also mail it to you intimately, but you are too expensive!”
She said confidently: "I didn't say the postage, won't she send it herself?"It's none of my business, I'll give 20 yuan a catty, buy it if you want, don't forget it!”
After hearing this, I was dissatisfied: "If you are like this, then I won't sell it to you, even if it is 50 yuan a catty, I won't sell it to you!."”
In the end, I decided to keep the 20 catties of honey for myself and give a bottle to my relatives and family to share, and keep the rest for myself, not knowing if the honey will expire.
It's really chilling to meet such a person, and I don't want to have too much interaction with her in the future, to sum up an old saying: eat a trench, grow a wisdom.
Example 3
A month ago, I lost my third brother, who was suffering from cancer.
Because of the third brother's funeral, the second brother's attitude made me completely alienate him.
That morning, my third sister-in-law and I found that my third brother's condition was not optimistic, and we hurriedly dialed 120 Ambulance** to take him to the hospital.
At around eight o'clock in the morning, I took the time to send a message to my second brother, telling him that the third brother might not be able to make it through.
However, he did not reply to my message. At two o'clock in the afternoon, the third brother passed away, and I called him again, but he said that he already knew.
I thought he would come back to preside over the funeral of the third brother, after all, his parents have been absent for more than 20 years, and the eldest brother is also 74 years old, and his physical condition is deteriorating, and it seems that his days are numbered. Even though the third brother was diagnosed with cancer in October last year, we didn't dare to tell him, for fear that the eldest brother would be stimulated to pass away.
At the beginning of June this year, the third brother's son, who was serving in the military in other places, took the non-commissioned officer entrance examination. After that, the child wanted to take leave to go home to see his father, but the army did not approve it. Perhaps because of this, the third brother felt desperate in his heart, and his condition took a turn for the worse.
I immediately called the second brother **.
He has long since retired and has been living in Xi'an. At first, he said that his second sister-in-law needed gallbladder polyp surgery, and then said that he needed to have a health check-up, and he could only come back if he confirmed that there was no problem with her body.
After half a month, he finally returned home.
My sister said at home that the second brother is back and can accompany the third brother for a while, so that the third brother will be in a better mood.
The reason why my sister said this is because she thinks that the three of us brother and sister have been working together and have a harmonious relationship. The second is that since the third brother fell ill, from hospitalization to **, the second brother has not come back for more than half a year. Even though we have a deep relationship between brother and sister, she thinks that the second brother should accompany the third brother.
Moreover, the second brother has been retiring early for more than four years (he is a special type of job), and he needs to go to social security every year to reimburse the expenses of various chronic diseases. These things are all that the third brother has been busy with.
In addition, he went to Xi'an, and the house here is still there. In recent years, just in time for the renovation of old communities, there are often maintenance work of water, electricity and heating. These trivial matters are also handled by the third brother.
During the time when the third brother was sick, the other siblings took time out to take care of the third brother. It can be said that everyone not only contributed money, but also put in a lot of effort. However, the second brother did not show the affection that should be between brothers.
Later, I learned that he only came to activate his social security card this time, because social security requires that he must confirm it in person.
In this way, my expectations were too high.
Actually, it's nothing. The second brother's indifference and lack of emotion are still to come.
That day, after the third brother urgently sent 120 rescue, I hurriedly sent a message in the family group, and then got busy.
When his brother-in-law, who was in his hometown in Inner Mongolia, saw the news, he immediately arranged for his son to drive his sister and sister to arrive. The purpose is very simple, that is, I hope to see the third brother again before he dies. However, in the end, they failed to do so.
On the afternoon of the day after the third brother's death, the second brother called me ** and asked me in a very unfriendly tone why the third sister-in-law did not invite him to the funeral. This question bothers me a lot.
I never thought that there would be such a ruleCould it be that his brother died, and he didn't want to come for the last ride because his brother and sister didn't invite him?
Don't say it, the second brother really didn't come. Moreover, neither his son nor his daughter came, and not even a single greeting was received.
Actually, from the first time he didn't reply to my messages, I shouldn't have expected too much from him.
After dealing with my third brother's funeral, I finally had time to calmly reflect on the relationship between our brother and sister over the years.
Thinking about it carefully, the second brother has lived to such an old age, and it seems that he has never really helped any of his brothers and sisters in the family. Since I was a child, my sister-in-law said that he was a little selfish in his bones, and I always thought it was my sister-in-law's prejudice against him.
At that time, his family said that he was selfish, and I only thought that he was poor, cowardly, and a cowardly person. In addition, he married a strong second sister-in-law, and the conditions of the family were not good, so there was nothing he could do. I always thought that was the reason.
However, now it seems that what the sister-in-law said is not wrong. If it is true, "the poor man must have something to hate."
Over the years, his family has always taken advantage of the affection between us, blindly asking for it, but never reciprocating. They will only ask their younger siblings to give for them unconditionally, but they never really care about their family.
When other siblings are in difficulty, he always makes all kinds of excuses to show that he is "powerless". Whether it's money or effort, it will be disappointing to play missing at critical moments.
Especially in the more than half a year since the third brother got sick, I have seen through their family thoroughly.
One day more than a month after dealing with the third brother's funeral, the second brother called me **, I was very angry and didn't answer. The next day, I called again, but I still didn't answer. He also tried to contact me via WeChat voice, but I ignored him. The third time I hit **, I took it and patiently asked him what was wrong.
Huh!It turned out that I was asked to go to the government affairs hall to write an invoice for him, saying that he needed to use it. I asked him if there was anything elseHe said no. I sneered in my heart and hung up directly.
Originally, if he asked about the situation of the third sister-in-law and the child after the death of the third brother, maybe I would continue to provide convenience for him, after all, he was born to a mother, and there is still some family affection.
But now, it seems, there is no longer a need for this.
I wrote back detailing his indifference and indifference to his family over the years, and told him that from now on, I would not let him consume my affection.
After that, I blocked his ** and deleted WeChat.
Really, at that moment, I felt a complete chill.