This book is amazing and comes with a new understanding every time you read it.
The reality of this ** does not lie in the emotional line of the male and female protagonists, but in the changing growth line of Tu Ran and Su Mo, and they are two contrast lines.
The emotional line of Lu Chengyu to Tu Ran arranged in * is actually a necessary "fairy tale" part of romance made by the author. In fact, the author mainly wants to talk about the process of women in marriage from confusion, confusion, helplessness, and painful struggle to calm and rational, indifferent things, and then Jedi survival. She wants to emphasize that women are too affectionate and men are too sensible, so women are always more likely to get hurt. So how can you protect yourself from being hurt, that is, naturally, don't focus on love. Elevate yourself and focus on yourself to be liberated.
Su Mo is a mirror of Tu Ran's youth, and what Su Mo shows is Tu Ran, who has not experienced the early death of his father. Kind-hearted and believe in love. Although Tu Ran experienced her father's early death and early maturity, she is still a blank slate emotionally, and she is not much different from Su Mo. Tu Ran is just a little sheep in wolf's clothing.
Tu Ran and Su Mo's marital emotional fluctuation curves are basically contrasting and synchronized, and I think this is also a dark line buried by the author. Tu Ran has grown up, she must be strong, always wearing a hard shell, so she requires herself to be calm and mature at all times, not to collapse, not to be hysterical, because she has grown up and has no right to collapse. But what are the real emotional fluctuations in her heart?If her father is still there, she doesn't have to live in that hard shell, how will she behave when facing marital emotional problems?Many of Su Mo's performances are actually the refraction of Tu Ran's heart. The author arranged the line of Su Mo to do the outward expression of Tu Ran.
Su Mo lost a child for Tong Ruian in college, Tong Ruian had no comfort, Su Mo chose to marry Tong Ruian.
Tu Ran also lost a child for Lu Chengyu because of the abortion, and Lu Chengyu had no comfort, Tu Ran chose to live with Lu Chengyu.
When Su Mo found out that her husband was cheating, she couldn't eat, so Tu Ran took food to persuade her. It sounds very reasonable. But in fact, after Li Chuxia came to the door, Tu Ran couldn't eat, but she forced herself to be strong and wouldn't behave so obviously.
Tu Ran and Su Mo's major emotional turns are basically in the same chapter or before and after chapters. Tu Ran is the Su Mo of the future, and Su Mo is the Tu Mo of the past. Tu Ran is the strong version of Su Mo after growth, and Su Mo is the weak version of Tu Ran before growth.
At the same time as Li Chuxia's love diary incident broke out, Su Mo finally gave up on Tong Ruian and decided to divorce. At this time, Tu Ran also tore up the love letter he wrote when he was young, and he gave up on Lu Chengyu. From this time on, Tu Ran will no longer wear the young filter of his first love** Lu Chengyu, and his identity has become the father of his future child.
Later, Lei Yuan and Su Mo started a relationship, and Lu Chengyu also began to try to save this marriage after discovering Tu Ran's love letter. Although Su Mo likes Lei Yuan, she will not fall into feelings, she first thinks about the future of herself and her children. At the same time, although Tu Ran likes Lu Chengyu, she is also more rational, she is also thinking about her own and her children's future life, and love is getting weaker and weaker in their life theme. They've all grown.
Tu Ran in her girlhood is like a clean and flawless white paper, pure and can be seen through at a glance, she looks forward to love and yearns for love, and is a literary girl who likes to read.
When he was about to graduate from college, his father was seriously ill, and the family sold his property to treat his father's illness, and Tu Ran, as the eldest daughter, had to support the burden of supporting the family. The mortgage, the living expenses of my mother and grandmother, the medical expenses, and the tuition fees of my younger brother are all supported by the family of four. From this time on, Tu Ran gradually began to change from a romantic literary youth to realism.
After working for a few years, love is no longer the focus of Tu Ran's life, but supporting his family. She packaged herself as a demon, fooled outsiders, and protected herself. When I met the male protagonist, it was when Tu Ran's financial pressure was relatively high, the mortgage had to be repaid, the living expenses and medical expenses of the two old people had to be paid, and the younger brother had to study abroad. In order to get better, she chose to marry a male protagonist with good economic conditions.
The male protagonist Lu Chengyu used to be the person Tu Ran liked when he was a girl, and many times Tu Ran had a layer of expectations and filters for him, so in the early stage of their relationship, even if Lu Chengyu's various performances made Tu Ran discouraged, she still had true feelings for Lu Chengyu. It wasn't until Lu Chengyu's predecessor came to the door drunk to deliver a wedding card that Tu Ran knew that Lu Chengyu had thought about divorcing her and getting back together with his ex, that Tu Ran gradually woke up. Aware of the precariousness of this marriage. This is the first time Tu Ran wants to divorce, even though she is pregnant at this time, she still goes out to work part-time to make money and lay an economic foundation for divorce in the future.
Later, because of the death of his grandmother, Tu Ran began to look down on many things, and he didn't want to investigate how much Lu Chengyu had feelings for him, so he only put forward a few conditions to Lu Chengyu, hoping that he would stop doing things that made him unhappy, and he would not mention the previous things and continue to live.
Just when Tu Ran wanted to immerse herself in a calm and happy life, Lu Chengyu's predecessor Li Chuxia sent two more copies of her love diary, Tu Ran saw Lu Chengyu's nostalgia and guilt for her ex, and she was finally willing to soberly face the reality that her husband had deeper feelings for Li Chuxia than herself. Start thinking seriously about divorce.
But if she gets divorced, first of all, she has to return part of the gift money given by the man's family when she got married, and this gift money has been used to buy a house for the heroine's mother, and if she pays back the money, she has to sell the house to make money, and the heroine's mother will definitely not agree. And what about the children in the event of a divorce?Do you have to raise your children on your own?In the face of all kinds of practical difficulties, the heroine hesitated again.
Later, when Li Chuxia got married, the male protagonist did not show that he wanted to divorce, and the female protagonist finally recognized the reality and no longer entangled in the male protagonist's feelings, she wanted to adopt her heart to raise her children, improve herself, and live a good life, as for what the male protagonist thinks, she doesn't care much anymore. These are all very helpless and helpless things, because reality does not allow her to be willful, and the result of willful divorce can only make her worse.
In this book, the male protagonist has asked the female protagonist three times, what do you want to say and want to ask.
For the first time, after Li Chuxia came to the door, the heroine went back to her parents' house to live. The male protagonist asked the female protagonist what her opinion was about herself, and the female protagonist said a bunch of things that she didn't have, but she just didn't dare to mention Li Chuxia, because she was weak-hearted, and she didn't dare to make emotional demands on the male protagonist. Because she used the man's gift money to buy a house for her mother, and she also said before that she got married for the man's money, so she didn't dare to ask the male protagonist in terms of feelings. So she said a lot, but she didn't really want to say it herself, so the male protagonist's answer was not what the female protagonist really wanted to hear. The two parted unhappily.
The second time, after the heroine gave birth to a child, the male protagonist took a ** to the heroine and asked her to give her opinions and score. At this time, the heroine has torn up the love letter she wrote when she was young, and she also gave birth to a child, she is busy with her children every day to earn money, and in the face of the child's father Lu Chengyu, she will no longer worry about what the male protagonist thinks, what are the emotional entanglements. She doesn't want to dwell on the things she used to do, she has little experience and no certainty in dealing with relationship problems, and she doesn't know how to deal with her husband's unfinished feelings for his ex-girlfriend. So she can only focus on earning money, if she wants to divorce, she must earn more money, raise children to pay off the mortgage, and pay back the man's family's wedding money. So the male owner asked her what her opinion was.,She didn't say anything else except that the male owner was too busy.。 Whether the male protagonist wants a divorce or not, she doesn't care too much anymore, anyway, she just wants to earn more money and prepare more, so even if she wants to divorce, she is not afraid. At this time, she was still on maternity leave, and basically went out to do a side job to make money immediately after the confinement period. My mother's family is unreliable, let alone my husband, it's true to make money quickly.
The third time is the wedding lounge of the male protagonist's friend Lei Yuan. The male protagonist asked the female protagonist for the third time, what do you want to ask. The heroine said that there was nothing she wanted to ask. She's already thinking about it at this time, so let's just get over it. Even if she asked, the male protagonist wouldn't say anything nice to coax her. The male protagonist has already said that he has been dating Li Chuxia for three years before, except that he has no name, it is no different from living a life. So what else is there to ask?Lu Chengyu is married, and Li Chuxia is married. What else to ask?Do you still want to ask, do you still love her? Do you love her or do you love me for such stupid things?Lu Chengyu still has feelings for Li Chuxia, that's for sure. You asked, confirmed, and then what?Don't you still have to live like this?Are you going to divorce just because he has no feelings for his ex?Where does the divorce money come from?You didn't catch the substantive evidence of his cheating, and if you left you, not only could you not share the money, but you had to pay it back. So the heroine doesn't ask anymore, she doesn't care anymore. Only by not caring about the man's feelings can he make his life better. This is also the consequence of her choice to marry her son.
Why is this ** aggrieved, because in real life, many people will swallow their anger in marriage, they can't divorce for various reasons, they are not reconciled, and they are even more unwilling to leave, so you have to endure it. So many people say that reading this ** is too embarrassing.
The heroine gradually matures under the pressure of life and reality, and the more she looks at the ethereal thing of love, it is actually quite sad to read. was originally a simple and lovely girl, who was pressed by life to grow up, from pure to philistine, and from philistine to becoming more and more indifferent.
I feel that this ** is gray and depressing, because the heroine herself is a person who is full of vitality and vitality despite her difficult life, but after marrying the male protagonist, she always becomes discouraged and depressed. Fortunately, she was finally freed from the pain and completed her self-improvement.
I feel that the concept of marriage conveyed by this ** book will make people feel a little discouraged and pessimistic, what it wants to say is: The marriage certificate can't protect anyone, and the only thing that can protect you is yourself. Don't let yourself get caught up in any feelings. Whether you can live well after marriage has little to do with whether you have love or not. It mainly depends on the character and sense of responsibility of the other party. Look down on love to live well, don't always be more serious, in all aspects. Don't always ask the other person if they love themselves, these are meaningless.
Su Mo said that if the two are together, they can try to accept each other, tolerate each other's shortcomings and mistakes, and avoid hurting each other, which is not love.
Is this love?I don't think it's love, isn't this just that the two of them have dealt with each other with one eye closed?It's a good thing to be tolerant of others, and it's something you have to do in marriage, but if you tolerate him just so that you don't get divorced, then what kind of love is that?Isn't it just a helpless compromise in the face of reality?Isn't it because the cost of divorce is too high to be cost-effective?If you have dealt with it, you will directly say that you have dealt with it, and don't wrap it with love.
I feel that the author conveys a very sad, helpless, and discouraged view of marriage. Don't look for favorites, find the right one, I agree with this. Marriage sometimes requires compromise, but if you keep forbearing, forgiving, compromising, and wronging yourself, I will feel that this kind of marriage is a catastrophe, and you are practicing in a catastrophe.
The heroine's marriage gives me the feeling that she is alone in the thorny bushes and struggles, and suddenly finds that there is a path that seems to be a very easy shortcut, and there are beautiful flowers blooming on the side of the road, she stopped to admire, but as a result, she stepped into the mud with a wrong step, and fell deeper and deeper, and then her body was entangled with vines, these vines bound her, if she wanted to leave, she could only cut it ruthlessly, then she herself would lose her flesh and bleed, or she would stay there, desperately self-improvement, and strive to grow up, and when she was strong enough, she would not be so painful if she wanted to break free。
The heroine did let go of herself in the later stage, reconciled with life, and made herself stronger with the help of the male protagonist, instead of being the male protagonist's big rear, which is also where she is smart and mature.