Only by reading Echoes can you understand love and marriage

Are you happily married?

Some people say that passion is romantic, sweet and sticky.

Some people say that it is plain and bland, and the taste is the same as chewing wax.

Some people say that mutual suspicion is inseparable.

Happy marriages are all similar, unhappy marriages have their own misfortunes, and everyone has their own understanding.

Writer stuff"Echoes"., focusing on hidden emotions, dissecting the truth of marriage, giving a unique answer, won the 11th Mao Dun Literature Award.

*In the process of solving a ** case, the protagonist female police officer Ran Dongdong inadvertently found that her husband had signs of suspected cheating, and thus fell into a marriage puzzle.

While she is looking for the truth of the case, she is also deeply exploring her marriage, constantly fighting inwardly, and finally repairing herself and becoming mature.

Marriage is a wonderful and long journey, and the two are so fortunate to be heart-to-hand fellow travelers.

Only by always maintaining the original intention, improving oneself, and growing hand in hand, can we step through the barriers of life and make the road of marriage more stable, happier and longer-term.

Ran Dongdong was born into a Kochi family and has a good higher education.

After graduating from the police academy, she entered the Xijiang Police Bureau, and because of her superior intelligence and thoughtful thinking, she quickly grew into a master of solving crimes.

At the same time, she has a cheerful personality, outstanding temperament, and versatile, and has become the object of pursuit by many young people.

By chance, she met Mu Dafu, a professor at Xijiang College who came to her home to review literature with her father.

Mu Dafu is very knowledgeable and dashing, and as soon as he looks at his face, he makes Ran Dongdong's gaze "like a soft finger, which retracts quickly with a light press on his face, as if he is not looking at him but testing the elasticity of his facial muscles." ”

The two have a crush on each other, confirm each other's adoring eyes, and fall in love.

Ran Dongdong took the initiative to ask Mu Dafu to learn from the book bar, praising him for "you are so amazing" and "really amazing".

No matter how tired she was from work, as long as she hugged him, the fatigue on her body was suddenly swept away, as if he was her American ginseng lozenge.

In a restaurant, in a movie theater, in a park, even if they have only an hour to spare, they can't wait to kiss.

Stimulated by a large amount of dopamine, the two are affectionate and resonate at the same frequency, like chewed gum, which can't be torn apart.

It was a matter of course, and they walked the red carpet of marriage as a matter of course.

After marriage, she loved his talent, and often sat quietly and watched him write, sometimes for two hours.

She looked at his long hair, which was completely standard for conductors;Looking at the bridge of his nose was like looking at a mountain she wanted to climb.

She thinks of him in everything she does, and when she eats something delicious, she packs it for him, and even if it's late at night, she will send it to him.

She would surprise him with a mouthful of fruit as he gushed, including a long kiss, of course.

And Mudaf likes to embrace her and read her words aloud to her, like sharing a freshly baked grilled steak.

He was willing to waste a lot of time on her, even if he was writing inspiring, but as soon as he heard her call, he immediately turned off the computer to accompany her, as if she was the scene of the crime, and he had to be the first to arrive.

In the three years since the relationship changed from a love relationship to a marriage relationship, Ran Dongdong and Mu Dafu are immersed in sweet and sticky romance and being loved.

Even if they occasionally quarreled over trivial matters, they quickly reconciled, and they were even sweeter than before.

Couples who are in the gum period can use more time and energy to enjoy the beauty of intimacy and the yearning for future life.

A good marriage must have love.

The throbbing of the first encounter, the passion of love, and the love of the newlywed make every couple unreservedly devote themselves to the hot relationship, so that each other's "emotional account" remains abundant.

They believe in each other, in their ideals, in the eternal happy time, just like they believe that the sun will rise tomorrow, this is the meaning of marriage.

The quiet change in feelings was after Ran Dongdong became pregnant.

Just two months after getting married, Mu Dafu submitted an application to Ran Dongdong to have a child, just like applying for a major topic.

Looking at Mu Dafu's hungry expression, Ran Dongdong, who was still immersed in the joy of the newlywed, nodded in agreement without saying a word.

Vomiting, nausea, disfigured, emotional instability, ......The strong pregnancy reaction made Ran Dongdong suffer, and Mu Dafu cooked delicious meals for her every day and took care of her carefully.

After her daughter was born, Ran Dongdong couldn't be single-minded in her husband's love, and she poured all her time into her daughter.

And Mu Dafu loves his daughter more than her, in order to kiss his daughter's little face, he shaves his beard once a day, for fear that his beard will hurt his daughter's **.

The family of three often huddled together, he kissed his daughter, she kissed her daughter, and then they kissed each other again.

After the daughter learned to kiss her face, the family played "domino kiss":

He kisses his daughter, and his daughter kisses her, and she kisses him, or vice versa, the daughter kisses him first, he kisses her, and she kisses her daughter.

With the passage of time, the focus of Ran Dongdong and Mu Dafu's relationship naturally shifted to the children and both parents.

Ran Dongdong gradually stopped caring about Mu Dafu's articles, and he didn't have the time and interest to listen to him read the highlights.

She felt that her husband's voice was not as good as before, and the smell of his body could no longer relieve her fatigue.

It's that buying clothes for him is no longer as selective as before, as long as he catches a similar one, it is considered to be a complete task.

And Mu Dafu also lost his desire and interest in pleasing her under Ran Dongdong's "full of care".

What he can do is to gradually know how to wait, slowly learn to accommodate, and silently take on the family's firewood, rice, oil and salt.

In fact, he still loves her, and she still trusts him, but the romance and beauty of marriage gradually fade out of daily life, and the once strong and visible love gradually recedes into the background.

What occupies their space is their daughter, the trivialities of life, and the two-person world that lacks some temperature and details.

Their love has been divided into maternal love, father's love, family affection and family responsibilities, just like a cocktail, all mixed together, no matter how much they shake, they can't tell the difference.

Even though getting along has become patterned and there are few common topics, love and trust still maintain the relationship between the two, so that the two hold hands and live a dull life.

During this period of marriage, love is shared, ideals are shifted, partner feelings are ebbed and gone, and mediocre life prevails.

Only by adapting to each other's changes, understanding and tolerating each other, can we fill the gap in love, relieve the pressure of parenting, and live a life with mixed tastes.

Unexpectedly, the shelf life of love is so short.

Since their daughter was 6 years old, Ran Dongdong and Mu Dafu have walked into the deep water area of emotion.

Ran Dongdong can remember every detail and date of the case, but often forgets to choose clothes for him, so that when she found the hole in Mu Dafu**, she was shocked to realize that she hadn't bought him ** for many years.

The pressure of work also makes her grumpy, and she can fight with Muduff if she doesn't agree with her.

She first refused to kiss him because he had eaten too much garlic, and then refused to hug him because he was too drunk.

Of course, Mudaf has also changed, often drinking when he is bored, and the wine glass gets bigger and bigger, and he even doesn't return home at night.

They are too lazy to secrete dopamine for each other, the number of pure hugs is gradually decreasing, and the intimacy index is almost down.

Especially after taking over the "Dakeng Case" ** case, which caused a sensation in the city, their emotional rift has expanded little by little.

The huge pressure of the surprise case made Ran Dongdong a highly suspicious and sensitive person. When retrieving the video footage of the case, she accidentally discovered her husband's opening record at the hotel.

This made the "idealist of love" Ran Dongdong collapse instantly.

She longs for eternal love, but Muduff's suspected "cheating" makes her fall into pain and can't extricate herself.

As a result, obsession and suspicion spread uncontrollably, and Ran Dongdong began to interrogate her husband like a prisoner, which was simply the case handlers investigating the suspect.

Mu Dafu did meet Wenyou's **, but he guarded the moral bottom line at the last moment, and also guarded Ran Dongdong's ideals.

But even though he tried his best to explain and retreat, Ran Dongdong still grabbed him, digging from the camouflage layer to the real layer and then to the pain layer, making him extremely tired and almost collapsed.

In the end, in the midst of wandering and entanglement, Ran Dongdong chose to divorce her husband.

When the "Dakeng Case" came to light, the successful Ran Dongdong had a heart-to-heart conversation with Mu Dafu.

Faced with Ran Dongdong's question, "You don't love me at all", Mu Dafu poked her heart with a few words:

Don't think that you can decipher human nature after solving a few cases, and you can classify and summarize all human feelings, is this possible?Feelings are far more complex than cases, just as the heart is far wider than the sky. ”

Can you investigate yourself?”

"Believe that you will be happy. ”

Ran Dongdong began to wake up, reflect, and re-evaluate himself

In fact, when I suspected my husband of cheating, I had already begun to have a crush on my subordinates, and I was not credible. ”

How did I end up like this?Obviously moved by him but spoke ill of him, how did I become the opposite of myself?”

There are a few people whose psyche can withstand such deep digging, including myself. ”

Can I change?”

She repeatedly questioned the secret areas of her heart, only to realize that she had never really seen herself clearly, and she had not yet explored such a complex human nature.

Guilt made Ran Dongdong recognise himself, and also awakened the love buried deep in his heart, as if he had obtained a kind of redemption and had a new "guilty love" for Mu Dafu.

Her anxiety eased, and her heart was like a thawing glacier, and she had the possibility of a new choice.

When people reach middle age, marriage enters the middle plate, there are wind and rain, and there are waves, and no one dares to guarantee that there is only one love.

This is a period that any couple goes through, and it is also the most dangerous period for a marital relationship.

In the collision of the soul and reality, only by bravely facing oneself, understanding oneself, and correcting oneself can we activate feelings and reconcile life.

The end of the story resonates with a heavy and distant resonance.

What are you thinking?He asked.

Think of yourself, do you still love me?She asked.

Love. He replied.

One question and one answer, flashing with the light of human nature, reflects the ideal and reality of marriage.

Ran Dongdong has charms and shortcomings. At different stages of her marriage, she has both the passion of a romantic journey, the loss of halfway, and the painful feeling of middle age.

But no matter what period she is, she can pursue her ideals, reflect on herself, and even face the incomprehensible humanity, showing a hint of heroism.

Russell wrote in On Marriage and Morals:

The kind of love that keeps the marriage happy and achieves its social goals is not romantic, but a more intimate, affectionate, and realistic feeling.

Click"Follow".I wish you and your lover to still love marriage after penetrating the truth of marriage, and always be the most affectionate happiness in the world.