When the children are going to talk about marriage, the in-laws sit together to chat, exchange opinions, and promote good things as soon as possible, which is folk customs and human nature.
However, when the in-laws meet for the first time, what is the right thing to do?
Some people like to talk about it and want to earn face for their children in the first place, so they show off all kinds of things.
Others, under the banner of "ugly words ahead", open their mouths about marriage lions and point fingers at the lives of their in-laws.
There are also some people who are curious and have no sense of boundaries, and they break the sand pot to ask them about all aspects of their in-laws, and they boast that they are all one family and do not speak two words.
All three of these approaches are wrong.
It is a big taboo between people.
When the in-laws meet for the first time, smart people know the following points.
This is great wisdom.
one
Hide money, don't show off your family background
Lao Zeng's family is good, and his son's personal conditions are also very passable, but his son's good marriage was almost ruined by Lao Zeng's mouth.
The son talked about a girlfriend, who is beautiful and has a good personality, whether it is education or ability, and his son is also a good match. The only disadvantage is that compared with the old Zeng family, the family background is relatively ordinary.
In fact, Lao Zeng was quite satisfied with this future daughter-in-law, but when the in-laws met for the first time to discuss the marriage of the two children, Lao Zeng inadvertently boasted about it, almost ruining this family business.
The first time they met, in order to save face for their son and show their family background, Lao Zeng kept revealing his family background to his in-laws, how many houses there were, what kind of car they drove, how the pension of the old couple was, etc., etc., and so on.
The in-laws were well-cultivated, and they didn't show much displeasure on their faces at the time, but afterwards, they said to Lao Zeng's son that they should think about such a family matter.
It turned out that the in-laws felt that Lao Zeng's display was nothing more than to prove that his daughter had climbed high.
It is very stupid to show off your family background in order to crush the other party and raise your own momentum.
Your children have already talked about marriage, and you are still showing your superiority, and it is easy for others to think that you are not satisfied with this marriage, and that this family affair is not the right door, and the household is wrong.
Doing so will not only not lead to a marriage, but will destroy it.
II. II. II
Tibetan words, don't open your mouth
There is a saying:
Parents love their children, and they will plan far-reaching things.
Because they love their children, parents will always make long-term plans for their children.
But sometimes thinking too much and too far is often a big thing.
Sister Zhou planned too long for her daughter, and ruined her daughter's good marriage.
The two families are ordinary families, and the two children are also compatible in all aspects, so it is a matter of course to talk about marriage.
But before meeting her in-laws, Sister Zhou felt that after a girl got married, she would make more sacrifices for the family, and her personal rights would not be guaranteed, so before getting married, she must fight for as many interests as she can.
After this village, there is no such shop.
That's what Sister Zhou thought at the time.
She is worried that if she does not ask for it before she gets married, her daughter will not get anything after she gets married.
Therefore, in the bride price, Sister Zhou raised a figure much higher than the local average.
At the same time, she also proposed to her in-laws that she hoped to change her children to a higher-grade car, so that her daughter would have more face.
The daughter felt that Sister Zhou's request was a bit excessive, and Sister Zhou said confidently
Raise your head to marry a daughter, bow your head to marry a daughter-in-law, a girl's family, you must raise your worth at this time.
Sister Zhou planned for her daughter, but she didn't consider the thoughts and actual situation of her in-laws at all, and after the two sides met for the first time, her in-laws directly rejected the marriage.
The amount of the wedding money is a courtesy, not a sale. Before opening your mouth to discuss, you should consider not only your own requirements, but also the other party's financial conditions and acceptance.
When talking about marriage, what I am most afraid of being exposed is greed, scheming, and good face.
For parents, the happiness of their two children for a lifetime is what parents hope for the most.
Compared with this wish, the thickness of the face and the amount of money spent are not the most important things.
Seeking common ground while reserving differences and working together for the happiness of children is the most important thing to do when in-laws meet for the first time. Marital affection between the sexes