Rather than calling Bai Jingqi the central character of "The Mansion Gate", it is more appropriate to say that "The Mansion Gate" reflects the growth experience of the second grandmother. The second grandmother is an ordinary woman, but she is a legendary figure, because she is the most misunderstood woman, because she is a woman and a man. An ordinary woman, with the power of one person, successfully rescued the Bai family from the predicament and further promoted the Baicao Hall. She has accumulated a lot of wisdom and experience in dealing with relationships and careers.
Although the era of the second grandmother is far from us, everything she did, no matter how many years have passed, is worth recalling again and again. The first thing the second grandmother did was to tell her daughters about the "Three Character Classic". Every family has a book that is difficult to read, and it is a common thing to read this ** inaccurately, only if you read it well, is the real ability. The three things that the second grandmother did are very meaningful for us. Only when we truly understand the three things that the second grandmother did, can we avoid detours in our future lives.
1.If the small things can't be tolerated, then the big plans will be disrupted.
The Bai family has been engaged in medical work for generations, and regards it as their responsibility to suffer from diseases and save lives. It's a big joke!Unexpectedly, he fell on the body of Second Master Bai. Second Master Bai treated Da Gege, who had not yet come out of the Zhan Palace, and successfully diagnosed Ximai for her.
In that era, the girl became pregnant before she got married, which not only ruined the family's reputation, but the Zhan family, as a member of the royal family, was even more unbearable for such a person.
Normally, Second Master Bai should have secretly informed Zhan Yu and Da Gege about this matter after the diagnosis, but he quickly told the news of Da Gege's pregnancy after the diagnosis. Zhan Yu had to destroy the Bai family's carriage for the honor of the Zhan Mansion, which implied that Second Master Bai's diagnosis might be wrong.
Da Gege is pregnant, although Bai Er Ye told the truth, he did not think deeply before expressing it, and when he cooperated with the people of the imperial court, his attitude was not frank.
Bai Mengtang knew that Bai Erye's medical skills would never go wrong, and in order to seek justice for the Bai family, Bai Mengtang decided to conduct a pulse diagnosis for Da Gege. He falsely claimed that Da Gege had a tumor in his stomach and only needed to take a few doses of medicine, and then without the knowledge of the Zhan family, he gave Da Gege a fetal pill.
As the months progressed, so did Da Gege's pregnancy, which meant that she needed to give birth to the child whether she wanted it or not. "I'm a doctor!Bai Mengtang made a decision, that is, the day his child was born, and it was also the day he asked the Zhan family to compensate for the vehicles and horses.
After learning about this, the second grandmother became very anxious. At present, no one in Beijing does not know that there is an error in his account. If the palace loses its vehicles and horses, the news of Da Gege's unmarried pregnancy will become a well-known thing, which will undoubtedly lead to a deepening of hatred between the two families.
In the original work, Bai Wenshi took the initiative to contact Bai Mengtang and expressed his opinion: in family life, the best thing to do is to avoid conflicts and disputes as much as possible.
Bai Mengtang expressed this opinion: This is not for family life, but reflects the reputation of my ancestors and the reputation of the pharmacy.
Bai Wenshi took a deep breath and asked, "How can we defeat the powerful forces of the royal palace?"What can I do?The Zhan family is now in chaos, why should they be embarrassed?
Bai Mengtang gritted her teeth and said: Since it is too late, she must give birth to this child if she wants to, and if she doesn't want to give birth, she must give birth, she has no right to interfere.
Bai Wenshi continued to persuade the old man: If you can't stand it, you may plot a bigger conspiracy.
Bai Mengtang became anxious: "Forbearance" is the word I can't bear the most, how difficult is it for me to move forward, why should I endure it?I'm a person who likes to endure, but that doesn't mean I'm good at it. No matter what difficulties you encounter, be patient, otherwise you will not be able to accomplish anything.
Bruven expressed the opinion that it also depends on the specific situation, if we let them go once, they will constantly owe us favors, and if there is really hatred, then the future.
Bai Mengtang shouted loudly before Bai Wenshi finished speaking: Which family's daughter-in-law are you and who are you defending?You woman, why are you so grumpy?The affairs of the home are not your responsibility as a woman.
Bai Mengtang turned a deaf ear to the advice of the second grandmother, he couldn't understand why he had to endure him because it was obviously someone from the Zhan Wangfu who slandered the Bai family's medical skills in order to protect his face. Not only could he not bear it, but he also had to fight for a fair treatment for the Bai family.
Soon after Da Gege gave birth, Prince Zhan returned home. Bai Mengtang took the second master confidently to the Zhan family to ask for horses and vehicles, and the Zhan prince had no choice but to admit defeat. The incident also led to hostility between the two families.
Bai Mengtang never expected the second grandmother's prophecy to take effect so quickly, and Ergege of King Zhan's Mansion was selected as the concubine in the palace, but for some reason angered the Empress Dowager Xi, and was finally put to death by the Empress Dowager Xi.
Guiwu is not only the nephew of Prince Zhan, but also the culprit who caused Da Gege to become pregnant in an unmarried state. On an outing, he played with a few children. In order to seek justice for the Zhan family, he deliberately bribed the people in the palace and tampered with the medical documents issued by Uncle Bai for Gege, which led to people mistakenly believing that Uncle Bai's medical skills were not exquisite, and eventually led to the unfortunate death of Da Gege.
If the Bai family could suppress their grievances before and let the Zhan family owe him a favor, then after the unfortunate death of Ergege this time, the Zhan family would definitely not let Uncle Bai fall into trouble.
It's a pity that a small intolerance may disrupt a big plan, Bai Mengtang has embarrassed the Zhan family, and this time the Zhan family will definitely not let go of the opportunity to punish him. The uncle of the Bai family was also imprisoned because of this, and although he managed to escape later, his life seemed destined to be hidden everywhere.
The second grandmother already had a long-term plan when she was still young, and she knew how to treat others well and give them forgiveness when appropriate, which is really not an easy task. We admire her wisdom and kindness, she is full of confidence in life, and her optimistic attitude towards life is admirable. Everyone doesn't want to be lost, but there are some things that we need to weigh repeatedly and avoid impulsiveness, or we may regret our actions.
It's not a bad thing to suffer a small loss once in a while and make others owe you a favor. If it is only to vent inner dissatisfaction and act impulsively, then it will only lead to the blocking of the retreat, resulting in more than worth the loss. Because, things don't go in the right direction. As a result, those who are committed to great things are forward-thinking, thoughtful, and flexible.
2.No matter how difficult it is for your in-laws, they should not let go easily.
At that time, the life of the second grandmother in the Bai family was not satisfactory, and it has always been a social concept of male superiority and inferiority of women. The life of the second grandmother is very difficult, she is a landowner, after her husband died, she has no son, so she depends on her two daughters to survive. Bai Mengtang has always been dissatisfied with the second grandmother, and has a cold attitude when talking to her, as if thinking that women should not dominate the housework.
However, unlike other older people, he has the ability to perceive uniqueness in others. The second grandmother is a good old man and is very filial to her children. The second grandmother has excellent housekeeping ability, and he is not worried that others will criticize the rise and fall of the Bai family, so he is willing to give her all the power of the Bai family.
However, after the second grandmother became a housekeeper, she encountered more troubles and problems. In the past, Bai Sanye only went against her, but since the second grandmother became a housekeeper, Bai Sanye's dislike for her has deepened, not only does he always go against her, but he also often uses various means, causing the second grandmother to feel aggrieved and shed tears many times.
Bai Sanye and Guiwu were often together, but when Guiwu did not return his gambling debts, he actually instructed the debt collector to find Bai Sanye. When the white lady found out, she called her son and asked him to return it. Bai Sanye has a very high passion for wealth, so he is naturally unwilling to repay his debts.
When the second grandmother learned that the person with the debt planned to hurt Bai Sanye, she quickly helped Bai Sanye repay all the arrears. But Bai Xiaomei sold her shares and divided her shares into pieces. Even though he knew that Bai Sanye had many bad intentions, and he took all the food, drink and prostitution for himself, he still decided to give him the shares of Nanji.
Bai Sanye declared in disbelief: Is this true or fake?How do you know I'm so stupid!It's so exciting that I can't even believe it. It can't be that I hold 3 shares and you alone hold 4 shares?
The second grandmother said expressionlessly: Dafang got 4 shares**.
Bai Sanye felt a little guilty and said: Sister-in-law, I really admire you from the bottom of my heart.
The second grandmother glanced at the third master and said: "Third master, if you can't write two white characters in one stroke, you won't fight at home in the future, and you won't be productive."
I have a deep admiration for the second grandmother, because her husband never interferes in the trivial matters of the family. The second grandmother was always worried about the reputation and future development of the Baicao Hall and couldn't sleep, but the second grandmother could only sigh and couldn't help her share the responsibility.
Uncle Bai chose to go incognito after suffering misfortune and lived a life in a foreign country, so family affairs were of little help to him. In order to treat his wife's illness, he invested all his savings in gambling activities, and ended up in prison. The uncle's wife could not accept the fact that the uncle was in prison, so she left behind three children and chose to hang herself to end her life.
The second grandmother's life is really very difficult, she not only has to support the dozens of residents of the Bai family, but also is responsible for managing the business activities of the Bai family, and has a contest of wisdom and courage with the third child. The second grandmother is an old revolutionary, and she has never been far from elementary school to high school. Still, she survived.
Is the second grandmother feeling tired?She wants to be a good wife and mother, and she wants to be a caring and considerate woman. Although she was tired, she knew that this was the real married life. If she wants to be a part of her husband's family, she will naturally have some friction with her in-laws, but as long as she treats others sincerely, she will feel guilty even if others treat her badly.
Although her husband was unable to share the pressure for her in his career, he was not only proficient in medicine and pharmaceutical technology, but also cared deeply about her children, which made the second grandmother think that he had his unique strengths.
The experience of the second grandmother reminded me of Yaping. Yaping was unhappy with the seriousness of her father-in-law's house and her husband's violent temper, so her children returned to her parents' home in just a few months, where they lived for decades.
Although Bai Sanye brought many troubles to the second grandmother, the second grandmother did not cry because of his predicament and asked him to return to his parents' home, but bravely faced the challenges in life and worked hard to find the beauty of life.
In fact, how can everything go well in a real married life?Marriage is a complex and delicate psychological process. Since both you and your husband grew up in different family backgrounds, coupled with the differences in male and female mindsets, this makes them prone to conflict and friction in their daily lives.
Those handsome, romantic, wealthy, and well-known men are really fictional scenes in idol dramas, and even if they exist, there are very few. In fact, a woman in marriage can live happily outside. If you encounter something unpleasant in your married life and return to your parents' home, even if you enter marriage again in the future, if you encounter similar problems, do you need to continue to return to your parents' home?
The composition of marriage is not 1+1=2, but 05+0.5=1, that is, two people each remove half of their individuality and incompleteness, and then combine them to achieve a complete state.
In real married life, problems are constantly emerging and solved, and in order to better integrate into the family, both parties are constantly adapting and running in with each other. In the process, we have both laughter and tears, but after experiencing inclusion and acceptance, everyone will gain something.
Compared with Yaping, the second grandmother's lifestyle is more transparent. If you don't get along well with your mother-in-law, she will be very angry. In love life, women should not have too idealistic illusions, and the truly courageous person is the one who has seen through the essence of life and still has a passion for life. If your married life is not satisfactory and you find that your husband has many shortcomings and your in-laws have many bad Xi, do not rush to complain, you can try to look at this problem with a peaceful mind.
If you can't change others, then it is enough to be yourself wholeheartedly and without any regrets. The second grandmother is my friend, she is a very assertive and self-fulfilling woman, and her life is full of sunshine and self-confidence. If you try to run your marriage like your second grandmother and the end result is not what you want, then you can choose to retreat from the difficult situation.
3.When it comes to children's education, it should not be easily ignored or laissez-faire.
Bai Jingqi did not have the Xi of crying from the moment he was born, but as he gradually grew older, he became more naughty and difficult to manage. Even if the second grandmother spanked his ass to make it swollen, he would not admit his mistake and cry loudly.
Compared with his mischievous personality, the second grandmother was more troubled by his teaching. He is a child who likes to read, especially "Three Character Classic" and "Hundred Family Names". Bai Jingqi was disgusted by the serious Mr. Teacher, and was unwilling to read those stereotypical books, so he clashed with Mr. Teacher many times, causing the teachers to leave one after another.
The second grandmother was desperate to find the teacher, and almost felt a splitting headache. Subsequently, the second grandmother met Mr. Ji Zongbu. On the first day of class, Ji Zongbu said to the second grandmother: If I am asked to manage the children, no matter how I guide them, you should not interfere.
Bai Jingqi deliberately teased Mr. Ji, but Mr. Ji not only let him eat the consequences, but also caused Bai Jingqi's arm to be injured and dislocated. Bingkuan went to the second grandmother to complain, and the second grandmother noticed that Mr. Ji was waiting for Bai Jingqi to apologize, so she took her arm up.
Although the second grandmother cared about the child very much, she did not have a heated dispute with Mr. Ji, but expressed her deep trust in Mr. Ji. After that, Mr. Ji and Bai Jingqi rode down to the river to fish, and although everyone around them thought that the teacher had behaved inappropriately, the second grandmother never said a word of "no" to Mr. Ji.
She could clearly feel Bai Jingqi's love for Mr. Ji, and at the same time, she also noticed that Bai Jingqi's attitude had changed dramatically. She is a thoughtful woman who has a sense of confidence in herself. In the past, I used to bully others, but now I immerse myself in books every day, learn Xi with Mr. Ji, and devote all my energy to important matters.
The second grandmother has two aspects that are very worthy of reference in terms of how to learn Bai Jingqi's Xi. First, the second grandmother is very serious about her child. First of all, the second grandmother pays great attention to the growth and education of her children. She never made teachers angry because of her children's naughty behavior, she always believed that children were not suitable for Xi and encouraged them to give up school. She has never accused Bai Jingqi of being a bad boy, thinking that he is irretrievable in his life.
Bai Jingqi has a completely different view from the second grandmother in terms of children's education methods. He is very strict with his daughter and very strict with himself. Bai Jingqi and Yang Jiuhong spent three years in Jinan, and when he returned to Beiping, his son Bai Jingye was already three years old.
Bai Jingye had never had face-to-face contact with him, and when Bai Jingqi hugged him for the first time and asked him to call him Daddy, Bai Jingye shed tears of fear. Bai Jingqi said angrily: What the hell are you, I never shed tears, when I was the same age as you, I always fed the goldfish with pills.
Bai Jingqi had a contemptuous attitude towards his son, never took his education to heart, and did not grow up with him like his father Bai Yingyuan. After Bai Jingye became an adult, he was very proficient in diet, ** and gambling, but he never embarked on the right path.
Bai Jingqi reprimanded Bai Jingye as a useless person, but Bai Jingye didn't take it to heart. His father was an old accountant, and he was a small accountant. Ever since he met Bai Jingqi, his father, he has been silent about his parents' harsh reprimands and has not reacted at all.
Everyone craves recognition and praise, and Bai Jingye is no exception. He has been a good boy since he was a child, and his grades in Xi are very good. If parents continue to evaluate and suppress their children negatively, children may gradually lose their positive attitude over time.
No matter how hard he tries, he can't get your affirmation, so it's better to choose decadence. In his opinion, decadence is a person's unwillingness to face everything in life. After all, putting in the effort is necessary, whereas in decadence, it can be achieved without putting in the effort.
Moreover, the second grandmother always does what she says. He is very loving and patient with his children, and he is very respectful of their opinions. In the process of teaching Bai Jingqi, Ji Zongbu had a completely different way from other teachers. For example, he believes that a dragon's name is a manifestation of a person's personality, rather than simply taking that name to become a dragon. Ji Zongbu has a unique perspective when dealing with many issues. He holds the view that there are nine types of dragons, each with its own uniqueness, and that the children of the world are more unique and cute because of their different personalities.
The second grandmother expects Bai Jingqi to be obedient, while Mr. Ji thinks that children's mischievous behavior is very common. However, he poured his love for his son into the country. Whether it was the Qin Emperor or the Han Wu, they were all families who rose through intrigue and chaos, but when they ruled the world, they taught them to be loyal to the monarch and the country. He was the emperor, but he made the people complain about him. They are all loyal to the monarch and the country, is he really qualified to be emperor?
In that feudal era, Mr. Ji's way of thinking was quite avant-garde, and although Mr. Ji had conflicts with other gentlemen, the second grandmother did not belittle him because of this. The second grandmother is a virtuous woman. She promised Mr. Ji that if he didn't intervene in the issue of her children's education, she really wouldn't intervene.
Frankly, it's actually a deep sense of trust and self-reflection. The second grandmother did not believe that as long as she could manage the affairs of the White Grass Hall, she would have the ability to take good care of her children.
Not only was she able to recognize her shortcomings, but she also had a deep respect for her teachers. Teachers and students have an equal relationship and trust each other. Parents have a lot of trust in their teachers, and teachers teach their children wholeheartedly. Although you may not fully agree with the teacher's approach to education, it is only on the basis of respect for each other that children can learn happily and grow up healthily in a harmonious atmosphere Xi
100 help plan
Whether it is in business activities, or in family management and children's education, the second grandmother has some aspects that are worth learning from and learning Xi. I think that around us, there are always some people who are difficult to ignore, and they will also have a lot to learn from Xi, they are human beings, thinking people. Although no one is perfect, a person who can go through life's challenges and live the life he desires is worthy of our admiration for his strong will, courage and wisdom.