List of high-quality authors
Hello everyone, welcome to my Baijia article, I am a literate koi
Have you ever heard such a saying:"People are not close to money, and people are not familiar with etiquette"?This is an old folk saying, which has been passed down to this day, and contains a profound philosophy of life.
So, what exactly does this sentence mean?Where did it come from?Today, let's take a look at the origin and meaning of this folk saying.
People are not close to money
The meaning of this phrase is that no matter how close people are to each other, money still has to be separated. In other words, even relatives and friends cannot ignore monetary fairness and reasonableness just because they have a good relationship.
Because money is the touchstone of human nature, it often leads to disputes and disputes, and even leads to the breakdown of feelings and the loss of family affection.
Therefore, between people, we must know how to maintain a certain distance and rules in money, and do not let money become an obstacle to feelings.
People are not familiar with etiquette
The meaning of this phrase is that no matter how familiar people are with each other, etiquette is still indispensable. In other words, even old acquaintances should not neglect politeness and respect just because they are familiar.
Because etiquette is the basic principle of interpersonal communication, it is a necessary condition for maintaining a harmonious relationship. If there is no courtesy, it will appear frivolous and rude, and even hurt the feelings and dignity of the other party.
Therefore, between people, we must know how to maintain a certain standard and form in the number of etiquette, and do not let the number of etiquette become a burden on feelings.
People are not close to wealth, and people are not familiar with etiquette", in fact, it evolved from two ancient sentences. We can trace their ** separately.
1.People are not close to money
The prototype of this idiom is "pro-wealth is not mutually exclusive", from "Three Kingdoms, Wei Shu, Wang Chang's Biography". "Chronicles of the Three Kingdoms" is a historical book from the end of the Eastern Han Dynasty to the beginning of the Western Jin Dynasty, and the author is Chen Shou. Wang Chang was an important minister of Cao Wei, and there is such a story in his biography:
In the past, Wang Chang was the assassin of Jingzhou, and his younger brother Yu were in Jingzhou. Yu is loved by Chang, and Chang wants to give Yu his wife and concubine. Yu didn't accept it, he was angry, and he didn't see each other. Yu said: "Relatives and wealth are not separated, and I can't bear to lose my relatives with wealth." "When you hear it, you see each other as before.The gist of the story is that Wang Chang was the assassin of Jingzhou at that time, and he loved his younger brother Wang Yu very much and wanted to give him his wife and concubine. Wang Yu politely refused, Wang Chang was very angry, so he ignored him anymore. Wang Yu said to others: "Family affection and property cannot exist at the same time, and I don't want to lose family affection because of property." When Wang Chang heard this, he reconciled with him.
This story illustrates that family affection and possessions cannot be confused, and if family affection is hurt for the sake of possessions, the gains outweigh the losses. Later, it evolved into the saying "people are not close to wealth", which means the same thing.
2.People are not familiar with etiquette
The prototype of this idiom is "people are familiar with etiquette", from "Historical Records: The Family of Confucius". The Records of the Historian is the first general history of China, written by Sima Qian. Confucius was a great thinker and educator in ancient China, and there is such a record in his family history:
Confucius said: "I am not a fool if I talk all day long." It is enough to retreat and save his selfishness. It's not stupid to return. Confucius said: "Look at the reason, look at the reason, and observe the safety." How are you so bad?How are you so bad?Confucius said: "Reviewing the past and learning the new can be a teacher." Confucius said, "A gentleman is not a weapon." Confucius said: "People who are familiar with each other do not know etiquette, and they are not respectful for a long time." ”And so on, these are Confucius's evaluations of his **. Among them, the last sentence is Confucius's evaluation of his ** sub-road. Zilu was one of Confucius's protégés, he was brave and good at fighting, but he was a little reckless and impulsive, and he didn't know much etiquette. Confucius said: "People who are familiar with it do not know etiquette, and they are disrespectful for a long time." This means that if people are too familiar with each other, they will forget etiquette, and after a long time, they will lose respect.
This sentence shows that people should maintain a certain amount of politeness and respect between people, and do not be presumptuous because they are familiar. Later, people used the phrase "people are familiar with but do not know etiquette" to express this truth. Later, it evolved into the saying "people are familiar with etiquette but not familiar".
People are not close to money, and people are not familiar with etiquette", in fact, it is a kind of wisdom and norm for interpersonal communication. It tells us that between people, we must know how to deal with the relationship between money and courtesy, do not let them become obstacles and burdens of feelings, but let them become the guarantee and lubricant of feelings
1.When it comes to money, you have to make a clear line and don't let your feelings suffer
Money is a necessity in life and a touchstone of human nature. Between people, money often leads to various disputes and disputes, and even leads to the breakdown of feelings and the loss of family affection.
Therefore, we must know how to distinguish the boundaries in terms of money and not let our feelings be affected.
Whether it is relatives, friends, or partners, we must keep a certain distance and rules in money, do not ignore the fairness and reasonableness of money because of good feelings, and do not change the sincerity and firmness of feelings because of the gains and losses of money.
We must understand that money is an external object, feelings are the heart, money can be earned and earned, but feelings are rare. We should cherish our feelings and not let money become an obstacle to our feelings.
2.Maintain the standard in terms of etiquette and don't let feelings be hurt
Etiquette is a basic principle of interpersonal communication and a necessary condition for maintaining a harmonious relationship. Between people, etiquette often reflects the attitude and respect of the other party, and it will also affect their own image and reputation. Therefore, we must know how to maintain the standard of etiquette and not let our feelings be hurt.
Whether it is an old friend or a new acquaintance, we must maintain a certain standard and form in the number of etiquette, and do not ignore the number of etiquette and respect because we are familiar with it.
People are not close to wealth, and people are not familiar with etiquette" This sentence has been passed down to this day, containing a profound philosophy of life. It tells us that between people, we must know how to handle the relationship between money and courtesy, and do not let them become obstacles and burdens for feelings, but let them become the guarantee and lubricant of feelings.
We need to draw a clear line between money and money, and don't let our feelings suffer;We must maintain the standard of etiquette and not let our feelings be hurt;We need to maintain a balance emotionally and not let money and courtesy become pressure.
Only in this way can we not only maintain our own principles and dignity in interpersonal communication, but also maintain each other's feelings and respect, so as to establish a harmonious and stable relationship and enjoy a beautiful and happy life.