"If you work the night shift, you will take care of me during the day, and the second daughter-in-law will be on top of me at night."
A harmonious relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the finishing touch to a happy marriage, while a discordant relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law may create a rift in the relationship between husband and wife.
Like a dragon giving birth to a dragon and a phoenix, a son raised by a sensible mother-in-law usually does not perform badly. And the reasonable in-laws will not condone their son's nonsense, but are willing to educate their son together with their daughter-in-law. On the contrary, a difficult mother-in-law is often inseparable from a husband with an ambiguous attitude, who may be indifferent, or choose to help her relatives and not help, which makes her wife feel wronged.
When faced with the unhappiness of her mother-in-law, women will first turn to their husbands for help. If the husband is sensible and stands up for his wife and forces the parents to back down, then the woman will feel protected and happy, and it will be less easy to care about trivial matters, unless the mother-in-law touches her bottom line and makes her feel unforgivable. However, if a man chooses to favor family affection between family affection and rationality, making his wife more aggrieved, women will be disappointed in both her mother-in-law and husband, which will affect the marriage.
As Mr. Tu Lei said: "All mother-in-law and daughter-in-law problems should be reflected on by mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and sons should also examine themselves." ”
For men who help their relatives and do not help, women must establish their own bottom line, dare to express dissatisfaction, and dare to ask men to make wise choices. Otherwise, the more aggrieved and tolerant women are, the more men feel that they take it for granted that they are on the side of family affection, and the less they will think about their wives.
If the woman is clear about the bottom line, and the man still chooses to favor family affection and blames the woman for messing around, it can only show that he does not really value marriage, and such a husband is not much different from not having a husband.
Ms. Gan kept asking, "When will you come back from your mother's house?"Don't think you'll have to pick you up in a low voice when you come back on your own. The second daughter-in-law didn't make much noise, you are good, you have a big temper. ”
I didn't expect you to pick me up in a low voice, I just wanted you to accompany me to the Civil Affairs Bureau. Are you embarrassed to mention your brother's house?I really don't understand, you two are the same father and mother, why is there such a big difference?Your brother can protect his wife and prevent her from being wronged, and you, let me go to work at night and serve your mother during the day, I think it's so beautiful. ”
Both of them are married to men from the old Fang family, one has the support of her husband, and the other refuses her mother-in-law's unreasonable request and is scolded for being ignorant. Ms. Gan thought of her different experiences from her brother and daughter-in-law, and she was so angry that she didn't know how to vent.
Ms. Gan's husband's name is Fang Li, the eldest son of the Fang family, and they have been married for 8 years and have a son.
Fang Li also has a younger brother who got married 5 years ago and lives in the same city. Fang Li's father has passed away, and his mother has been living with her eldest son's family.
Why don't you take turns living in my house all the time?Is it to help me with the children?Phew, don't talk about helping me with the kids, I'm thankful for being able to watch my son at work and don't let him run around. She only knows how to play mahjong all day long, and if it weren't for the fact that my son lost three or four hours without anyone taking care of him, and almost scared me to death, I wouldn't have quit my old job and tried my best to find a night shift. ”
The reason why Fang Li's mother has lived in the eldest son's house for a long time is mainly because the younger son is not as obedient as the eldest son and will not be obedient to her.
If Fang Li's mother is bullying the little daughter-in-law and looking for trouble with the little daughter-in-law, the little daughter-in-law doesn't need to quarrel with her, she just needs to tell her husband the truth about the matter, Fang Li's younger brother only believes in his wife alone, and then goes to his mother to theorize. No matter how Fang Li's mother sprinkled and played the emotional card, she couldn't move this "hard-hearted" little son.
It's different in my house, as soon as my mother-in-law sheds tears, my husband immediately feels guilty, and then says that I have a lot of trouble, which makes his mother sad. Including the incident where my son almost lost it, he can still blame me. Because Fang Li was confused, coupled with the unreasonable mother-in-law who had been stranded at home, it brought a lot of trouble to Ms. Gan, resulting in frequent quarrels between Fang Li and Ms. Gan, the relationship between the husband and wife had already broken down, and the marriage relationship was actually in a precarious state, and it was only the last blow to break it.
Not long ago, Fang Li's mother-in-law was hospitalized due to illness, and after the operation, she had difficulty moving and needed someone to accompany the bed. Since Ms. Gan and her younger daughter-in-law both have jobs and have to take care of their children, they decided to hire a caregiver, and the cost of the caregiver will be shared equally between the two families. However, the mother-in-law made an unexpected request: "You work the night shift, serve me during the day, and the second daughter-in-law will take care of me at night, isn't it just right?"What a waste of money?”
Hearing this, Ms. Gan responded angrily: "Think beautiful?"We're not machines, we're running 24 hours a day, aren't we?If it's that easy, why not ask for your two sons?”
In the face of Ms. Gan's refusal, her mother-in-law began to cry, and there was a lot of trouble in the hospital, constantly blaming the two daughters-in-law.
Fang Li's younger brother couldn't stand it, so he decided to stand on his wife's side, and said without hesitation: "Sister-in-law, tell me after finding a nurse, I will pay." Our family's financial situation is better, and we can afford these expenses. Mom, if you don't want a caregiver, it's okay, just watch it yourself!Anyway, my daughter-in-law and I have to go to work, so we don't have time. If you can talk about it, we can take the time to see you. ”
After saying that, Fang Li's younger brother ignored his mother's crying and left the hospital with his wife.
Seeing her youngest son treated like this, Fang Li's mother became even more angry, and held her eldest son tightly: "Your younger brother is unreliable, you can't leave me alone in the hospital." Originally, I was counting on the second daughter-in-law to share half of it!Now, let your daughter-in-law resign and stay in the hospital, when will I be discharged from the hospital, when will she leave. Son, you can't ignore your mother, your mother raised you brothers for nothing. ”
In response to her mother-in-law's request, Ms. Gan was so angry that she turned around and left, thinking of not coming to the hospital again. It is really impossible to expect her to resign and accompany this irrational mother-in-law wholeheartedly.
Ms. Gan was even more disappointed that Fang Li agreed to her mother's unreasonable request, hurried home to find Ms. Gan, and urgently asked her to ask for leave immediately, and if the company did not agree, she would resign without hesitation. In any case, Ms. Gan must stay by her mother's side at all times.
I was really angry, already disappointed at first, and then even more angry at the thought of his brother taking such good care of his wife. Why is there such a big gap between a family and a family?Why would I choose that scumbag?I was blind at the beginning!"
Ms. Gan was so angry that she picked up the things at hand and threw them at her husband, and then, grabbed her bag and rushed out of the house, first went to school to pick up her son, and then returned to her parents' house with her son.
I gave him a week to come to my mother's house with his household registration book and marriage certificate to find me and divorce me quickly. Otherwise, I'll find a lawyer. "
Just like Xiao Yuanyi's emotion in "Splendid Stars": "There is no bride in the world who can't compare to the aunt, it's just that the son-in-law refuses to stretch out his hand." ”
You must know that Cheng Shaoshang's father, Cheng Shike, lived in ancient times when filial piety governed the country, emphasizing that the relationship between monarchs and ministers should be promised to death, and the relationship between father and son should be filial. Although Mrs. Cheng is indeed a little unreasonable, she can't do anything to her daughter-in-law in the face of this son who is crazy about protecting his wife. After all, not many mothers are willing to fall out with their son, and they have to rely on him to take care of them when they are old!
Marry him, and his responsibility is to protect you and give you a sense of security. If he can't, it only means that you have chosen the wrong person. Such a man is not worth your life.
Do you have any good advice for Ms. Gan?Feel free to share your views in the comments section.