Marriage is an economic institution in which property and debts are shared, without guaranteeing affection. The essence of marriage is to complement each other's resources。In the midst of the economic crisis, the complementarity of resources has changed, and marriages have become more precarious. In times of economic crisis and marital crisis, the focus is not to blame the other half who has no conscience, but to give priority to solving economic problems.
Modern monogamy legally guarantees the sharing of property and debt. Why is the law like this?Because the law guarantees thatRaising offspring and passing on the genes of private property to oneself。Men can't guarantee that the children born to their sex partners are their own or the king's next door, so monogamy actually ensures that men raise their own genes and leave their property to their offspring.
The essence of marriage is not love, the essence of marriage is complementary resources. Both parties got married because the other had something I needed but didn't have. For example, sexual resources, the division of labor and cooperation between the two parties are happier.
There are also complementary places in love, and what I fall in love with you is something that I don't have. Introverted love unrestrained;The weak fall in love with the tough;Calmly in love with the passionate;Conformist love unruly. Quality marriageTwo of the factors that match them are:Resources meet the long-term needs of both partiesBoth parties have a view of marital responsibility.
Professor Ju Qiang, a management psychologist, believes that the eight elements of the door are respectively referred toAppearance, intelligence, virtue, talent, wealth, influence, sexual function, and morality.
Marriage begins with love, but love has an element of passion。The main reason why love makes people feel so excited and sauntered is that the human brain produces hormones and neurotransmitters that can cause happiness in the nervous system. Dopamine plays a leading role. It's just a pity that these hormones can't always be at high levels. The concentration of love hormone is past its peak and begins to subside。And males decline faster than females.
If marriage equals love, then love comes, get married;Love is gone, divorce;Come and knot again, go and leave. Then you don't have to settle it, you can sign a temporary agreement.
Love only works in the early stages of marriage, and in the later stage, it is resource matching and sexual intensity matching.
How can resources meet the long-term requirements of both parties?
I'm lustful and you're beautiful, but it's a pity that your appearance has become more and more depreciated as you get older;
I'm masculine and you're gentle, but then my temper exploded;
I can earn you if you love money, but I just caught up with the economic crisis......
With the change of the resources of both parties, the stability of the cooperation of the complementary resources of the marriage is changing.
The economic situation has changed, and so has the marriage.
Originally, the male protagonist was outside the female protagonist, the economic crisis was unemployed, and the salary was cut, and the male became poor;
The original AA system has become a person who can't afford to make money;
Originally, I would earn you and spend it, but it became a ...... that all consumption was downgraded
And what about love to **?Love translates into the same feelings as responsibility and loved ones.
And the essence of love is giving. If love is still there, you can't ask for it like the other party, but pay for the other party.
The first surge in the divorce rate in the United States after World War II occurred in the 70s of the 20th century, during the two economic crises of 1969-1970 and 1973-1975.
In 1980, the U.S. economic crisis erupted again, directly contributing to the divorce rate peaking in 1981.
In November 2008, the financial crisis struck again, and the divorce rate in the United States surged again.
In the economic crisis stage, the parties to the marriage will also have increased conflicts due to unemployment, debt, consumption, etc. Many people are unable to give up a bad marriage (divorce) or let go of each other (dislike each other over and over again);It's still very bad. Especially women, most women attach importance to marriage, and even if they encounter a bad marriage, they can't afford to let it go. In psychological counseling, there are many women who suffer from mental illness, psychosomatic illness, and even death because of the fault of the other half who has no conscience. While scolding each other for being shit, he endured it.
While clinging to this pain, think more about the nature of marriage. The essence of marriage is not love, love is a passion, a passion that no one can guarantee. When the passion wears off, the resources of both sides change and no longer complement each other, and the other party has no sense of responsibility, it doesn't make much sense to blame and forbear. Most importantly. Ask"Do I have the (financial) ability to live independently". "If the other party is shit, will I live better without shit".
If the answer is no, then it is useless to quarrel and entangle, first to solve the economic problem, and then to exercise a strong mind, to solve the ability to live a better life. The essence of marriage is an economic system, and the essence of love is not eternal, so you don't have to suffer and punish yourself for the turbulent marriage in the economic crisis.
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