As parents, we always try to provide the best support and assistance to our children in any way we can. However, there are situations where we need to be mindful of our roles and responsibilities and not to interfere too much in our children's lives and decisions. Here are three kinds of help, as parents, we should try to help as little or no as possible.
The first type of busyness: making decisions on behalf of the children.
Many parents like to make decisions for their children, especially those who are just coming of age. They may feel that these young people do not have enough experience and wisdom to make the right decisions, so they will choose schools, majors, careers, and so on for their children. However, this practice can weaken your child's sense of self-worth and fulfillment, and it can also cause her to lose confidence in himself and his or her ability to control himself. Therefore, as parents, we should encourage our children to make their own decisions and give advice and support when they need help, rather than making decisions for them.
The second type of busyness: solve all the problems of the children.
Some parents like to solve all problems for their children, whether it is academic problems or life problems. They may help your child with homework, attend parent-teacher conferences on your child's behalf, help your child solve problems, and so on. However, this practice can weaken the child's self-competence and independence. As parents, we should help our children learn to solve problems and overcome difficulties on their own, rather than solving all problems for them. When they encounter problems, we can give guidance and advice to help them think and solve problems.
The third busy: to meet all the needs of the children.
Some parents will meet all of their children's needs, whether they are reasonable or unreasonable. They may buy expensive items for their children, meet all of their children's requirements, and so on. However, this practice can create a sense of dependence and dissatisfaction in children, and it can also make them feel that their needs are more important than those of others. As parents, we should educate our children to learn to distinguish between reasonable and unreasonable needs, and help them learn self-control and frugality. At the same time, we should also let our children know that their needs are not the most important, but that the needs and interests of others need to be taken into account.
In conclusion, as parents, we should give guidance and support to our children when they need help, rather than making decisions, solving all problems or meeting all needs for them, and we should encourage our children to learn self-control and independence so that they can better grow and develop as responsible and capable adults.