There are many men around Wen Huixin, who has a successful career, but the only ones who can really be called "related" are her ex-boyfriend Chen Zijie and her little milk dog Pan Zhiao.
From beginning to end, Wen Huixin's attitude towards the two of them is completely different, she knows very well who is the real son of heaven and who is just enjoying the moment.
In the end, how can Wen Huixin tell whether a man is true love?
It's not that hard, she knows itIt is the man who really loves herself that allows her to be both a child and a parent in a relationship.
That is, it is not contradictory that men and women in true love will spoil each other as "bear children", and at the same time will allow each other to powerfully clean up the "mess" for themselves.
Chen Zijie was not a car mechanic at the beginning, he was the top photographer in the circle at the beginning, and he was also Wen Huixin's best partner.
But when the two were chasing the news, Chen Zijie was accidentally injured and could no longer continue his favorite job, so he had to quit as a car mechanic.
Therefore, Chen Zijie and Wen Huixin have a common language and an emotional foundation. It is only because of external influences, maybe low self-esteem, maybe post-traumatic depression, that they break up.
After the breakup, Chen Zijie has always been by Wen Huixin's side, he will not take the initiative to disturb Wen Huixin, but as long as the other party needs or is in a deep trough, Chen Zijie will immediately stand by her side without hesitation.
Dr. Shefttel, research findings:
Both men and women may unconsciously regress into the "child self-state".That isBoth men and women want to be unconditionally satisfied by each other in love.
Psychologist Harpy, argues:
The most beneficial regressive pattern for intimacy is "swapping with each other to be children."NamelyTwo people in love can be met by each other to be loved and accepted, and good feelings will allow us to become children and adults at times. Because only in this way can both partners enjoy it and be nourished by love.
The love between Chen Zijie and Wen Huixin is that they are both children and representatives of each other's parents.
When, Wen Huixin forgets her original intention for the sake of quick success, Chen Zijie will gently accompany her to find the way to come.
When Wen Huixin "underestimates the enemy", Chen Zijie will rationally remind her that "being a mother is strong", and Sister Hua, who returned after the divorce, should not be underestimated.
When eating the cake made by Wen Huixin, Chen Zijie would indulge in earthy love words to make her happy.
Just ask, who can refuse this kind of mature and emotionally stable man?What's more, he is still spoiled and respectful of you.
Wen Huixin and the little milk dog Pan Zhiao are in love with each other, but she knows that this is an unequal love, and she can only be a parent and not a child in the relationship.
Perhaps, that's what everyone says:"Don't grow up with a boy".The reason for it.
Wen Huixin is just a kidney-friendly to the little milk dog and not a heart, in fact, she has never regarded Pan Zhiao as a boyfriend, at best a lover.
Therefore, no matter how difficult Pan Zhiao behaved, Wen Huixin demanded that he must leave her house before eleven o'clock, without any regard for his feelings.
Even when Pan Zhiao tried to ask, "Do you want to do it again", Wen Huixin refused on the grounds that it was almost eleven o'clock.
Wen Huixin's rationality towards love is manifested in the fact that her feelings for any man do not involve interests.
She disdains to use her feelings as bargaining chips to win opportunities or career promotions, which is a truly smart and confident woman.
Wen Huixin knew that she and Pan Zhiao were not in love, and they were destined to not last long, but they were just warm to each other for a short time.
Therefore, when Pan Zhiao made a table of love dinner for her with his heart, Wen Huixin was not moved but coldly refused"10 years ago, I would have eaten this set."
She didn't want to develop any relationship with Pan Zhiao other than "on the boat", so she said to the stunned little milk dog"Give me back the key".
Some people may say that Wen Hui is scumbag, but in fact, she has not put love with interests, and is already responsible for herself and the other party.
She loves Chen Zijie and really enjoys everything this love brings her, when Chen Zijie is ready to go to a distant place to pursue a career, Wen Huixin will ask in a panic:
What about me?Didn't you say that everything should be together?No matter how good I do, it's useless, you're not by my side.At this time, Chen Zijie became Wen Huixin's parents again, and patiently coaxed her:
We should be happy, because we know that we are all striving and working hard for our own ideals, right?She enjoyed Pan Zhiao, but set a boundary to prevent the little milk dog from getting caught in it, and when Pan Zhiao said that he wanted to go with her, Wen Huixin said coldly:
In short, no matter what you do, I will not be with you. Think rationally with your brain, not emotionally, otherwise, you will always be a naïve child and doomed to not succeed.From Wen Huixin's relationship with them, we can feel the completely different feelings.
Because she is as smart as her, she knows which relationship is the true relationship and who is the true lover.
Charmaine Sheh, Queen of Journalism
About the Author:
I'm Qingcheng. A psychologist with temperature, ** is a life recorder.
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