Love is a problem between two people, but when it comes to marriage, both parents will intervene, and this becomes a problem between the two families.
Before getting married, everyone talks about the bride price. The bride price bears witness to the hearts of the people and often reflects the strength of the relationship.
Many lovers overcome this obstacle and eventually break up because they can't agree on the bride price. Of course, there are also many people who have overcome this obstacle and naturally come together and start a family.
Except for a few families who regard the bride price as a "selling daughter" to supplement their son's bargaining chips, most families' attitudes towards the bride price are negotiable, and it is a courtesy measure to measure the attitude of men. As.
It is a form in which the final bride price is given to the young couple in the form of a dowry.
Even so, there are still many men who are angry when they mention the topic of bride price, and once they say the word bride price, their faces completely change, and the former friendship disappears at that moment.
Betrothal is a custom that has been around since ancient times. No matter where you go, there's no way to avoid it. The amount of the rewry can be more or less, but the process cannot be reduced.
Most boys are able to accept engagement. If there is a relationship, they really want to be together for a long time and don't want to break up because of the engagement. They knew that what the girl's parents wanted was peace. "If it's a matter of the heart, why worry about money? I was embarrassed, I was in love, and I wanted to prove my determination to marry a woman with practical actions. Money. It's just the external stuff that makes emotions really valuable. ”
There are several reasons why a boy cannot accept a bride price:
1. It's not that I don't want to receive a dowry, but my family is poor and I can't afford it.
Most boys do not start working until they reach the age of marriage. In the short term, their careers have not yet been established, their incomes are meager, they have no salaries, and they have no savings on hand.
Ultimately, the bride price must be received from the parents. This is a common situation.
If the family environment is good, the bride price will not become an obstacle to marriage, but for the average family, a bride price of hundreds of thousands or 200,000 yuan is a lot of money.
If the parents are engaged in agriculture, the family environment is average, and there is an eldest brother in the family, the pressure on the parents is very great, and it is difficult to come up with the dowry money.
There are examples of this around me. The two brothers are of the same age. Their parents spent most of their savings to prepare for their brother's wedding. It is naturally very difficult for my younger brother to live here.
Many families have two sons, and the conditions are average, and they will choose one of them as a son-in-law. This is also a kind of helplessness.
2. The bride price demanded by the woman is beyond her means.
Most men are willing to accept a bride price. After all, it is a long-standing custom, and no one is an exception.
The bride price is acceptable, but it must be within the acceptable range and in accordance with local customs and customs.
Even if the behavior is beyond one's ability, as long as it is not extremely outrageous, it is acceptable. Many families are now in debt. In order to get their children married, they borrow money from the people around them and gradually increase their income. Please pay back the money after you get married.
But if it exceeds their expectations too much, the boys will show strong opposition.
3. If you want to take advantage, you will lose money.
Some people are very selfish at heart. They carefully choose their partners and never think about spending money on brides.
They may be looking for a well-conditioned, wealthy family. In this case, even if you pay the bride price, the other party may return more of the dowry.
Maybe the bride price is purely saving, because the girls are not short of money and do not care about the bride price.
Or he plays the emotional card and uses all means to seduce the girl because he loves her and asks her to talk to her parents and, if she can, save the dowry. Once the dowry is finalized, they use emotions as shields.
Although they want to embarrass their parents, pretend to be filial, and treat the girl well to save the bride price, they may not consider the girl's perspective at all. People are selfish.
4.I really looked down on this girl and felt that she was not worth so much money.
In the marital love stage, we weigh interests and humanity.
Everyone has a practical side and has their own little abacus.
Boys also have a steel yard in their hearts to measure the value of girls. Including physical appearance, income level, family situation.
If the girl is as beautiful as a flower, has a decent income, and has a good family environment, then this industry will definitely bring profits. Please exchange the bride price for your beauty. If you get married, you can share the pressure with yourself, and the girl's family will help you, so why not get married?
But if the girl's conditions are average in all aspects and the feelings are not deep enough, it is useless to give her a lot of colorful gifts. Be serious.
For these people, your values determine how many gifts they will appreciate.
You can't measure how you feel by your involvement. When dealing with people with whom you have a deep relationship, you don't have to have an unhappy relationship because of your engagement. After all, engagement is a formality, and marriage and life are life itself. Main activities:
If you really want to go out with your partner, you can negotiate the bride price, and you can make concessions according to your partner's actual situation. If both sides make concessions, it may end up being a happy thing for all.
But if the other party is full of calculations and selfishness, they will show their true colors in the relationship. In this case, the amount of the bride price does not matter. It is best to keep your distance from the person as soon as possible. 。