In the past few days, a ** has attracted a lot of attention from netizens, a woman was accused by her mother because she was going to marry far away: she couldn't count on it, and asked her to give her 2,000 yuan a month. **The woman in ** kept sobbing, and this scene touched the deep emotions of many people, especially women.
Some people put forward their own views on "long-distance marriage", some people sympathize with the girl's plight, thinking that long-distance marriage is an escape from the original family, and some people think that a girl's long-distance marriage is equivalent to "raising for nothing", and it is natural for parents to ask for money. There are also many netizens who pay attention to the relationship between women and their original families.
In fact, this is essentially the status of women, the position of a girl in a family's life.
In some places, because of the influence of ideas and customs, the daughter after marriage is basically not allowed to go back to her parents' home, and many women want to go back to accompany their parents more, they will be disliked, and even have a lot of gossip, which also indirectly leads to some families being restricted by the surrounding environment and not daring to let their daughters "often go home to see".
Especially in recent years, "whose house is the New Year spent in", in fact, in reality, there are many daughters who want to go back, and their husbands have no opinion, but on the contrary, their parents do not let them go back, just because the married daughter cannot spend the New Year in her parents' house. And the essence of these ideas is the embodiment of "patriarchy", men are the incense of a family, to be passed on to the next generation, so they are highly valued, and women are just "passers-by" in the family.
A girl is destined to accept a lot of injustice from birth.
Even in the current situation of rapid development of society and continuous progress of the times, "patriarchy" has not disappeared, but has become more subtle and less noticeable.
In some backward places, patriarchy is very straightforward, which can be manifested in all aspects of life, boys can go to school, while girls may drop out of school anytime and anywhere because of the needs of the family, boys eat and wear well, and girls may just pick up the leftovers used by others, a family will not be willing to "invest" in girls, because they feel that girls are ultimately people in other people's families.
And in developed regions, even in first-tier cities, do you think that "patriarchy" does not exist? Wrong, it will be very hidden, it may be an opportunity for promotion and salary increase, it may be a competition, it may be a ...... for women to retire from the workplace and return to their familiesThese are unfair to women, and even if they are often made voluntarily, those choices are not influenced by some preconceived notions.
A girl is raised at the beginning, no matter what the conditions, she is raised according to the attributes of "obedience", "assistance", "care", "regulation", etc., and is rarely taught to "compete", "independent", "self-confident" and so on like a boy. Therefore, even if many girls are highly educated, their discomfort will be more obvious after they come to society, they will have fewer opportunities to obtain key positions in society, and their access to resources will be limited, which will lead to a reduction in their "right to speak", and it is easy to become a supporting role in a relationship, and they will naturally be asked to "retreat behind the scenes" in the family.
If you want to get out of such a situation, you must first accept the reality and clarify your own situation, and you can't just feel sorry for yourself and others. If your parents are "patriarchal", you need to understand as soon as possible, don't have unrealistic illusions again and again, and let yourself desperately find traces of love in a relationship that is destined to be loved, which is too tiring.
Secondly, if a girl wants to live a chic life, financial independence is very important, and the reality is very realistic, if you can not be controlled by others in terms of money, then most of the problems in life are no longer difficult for you. It's like the famous saying in "Xi Bao" - I need a lot of love, and if there is no love, then there is a lot of money.
In the end, hope is always in yourself, every girl will become a mother and raise the next generation, hope that change starts from yourself, so that your next generation, especially your own daughter, will not experience these "injustices"!