Zhou Bingkun, the youngest son of the Zhou family, compared with his brother Zhou Bingyi and sister Zhou Rong, his path to education is not outstanding. Zhou Bingyi, an outstanding erhu player and campus poet, had published a number of poems long before the Cultural Revolution. And my sister Zhou Rong, who has a natural voice, has participated in the ** performance in City A. Although Bingkun did not have his brother's literary talent and his sister's outstanding achievements, he grew up silently in the family. His mother's preference for the eldest son, while his father's pampering of his sister, made him somewhat neglected at home.
Although he didn't read much, Bingkun listened to the literary discussions of his older brothers and sisters since he was a child, and the world of ideas was not barren. One day, when the family was discussing Gregory in "The Quiet Don", Bingkun suddenly interjected: "A character who can't help himself but is not willing to be involuntarily. This made his older siblings realize that he actually had a deep love for literature. He knew he didn't read much, so he chose to be silent when his family was discussing, but he listened silently in the corner and drew wisdom from it.
Although his education is not high, Bingkun is a thoughtful person deep down. His thoughts come from life and from his love for literature, which makes him have a completely different personality and destiny from those who have not been influenced by literature.
Times changed, and the policy of going to the countryside made his brother and sister go to the corps and the countryside respectively, while he stayed in the city and became a young man waiting for employment. Subsequently, he was assigned to work in a lumber mill. Despite his ordinary life, Bingkun is a down-to-earth and hard-working person, and his quality is trustworthy.
Among the many suitors, Qiao Chunyan was the first girl to confess to Bingkun. Chunyan is a straightforward girl, and her love is sincere and deep. In the bath center, Qiao Chunyan, as a pedicure worker, did not complain every day like other ordinary girls. Although she was not satisfied with the position at first, she quickly accepted her fate, began to study seriously, and gradually became the proud protégé of the master. In the unit, her skills and professionalism have been widely recognized, and even the leader has to give her a few thin faces. She has the hope of being named a pacesetter in the city, which is undoubtedly a high praise for her work.
The Qiao family and the Zhou family live on the same street, the Qiao family lives at the end of the street, and the Zhou family lives on the street. The Qiao family has three daughters, of which Qiao Chunyan is the youngest. Both of her older sisters went to the Heilongjiang Corps, while she stayed at home. She and Zhou Bingkun are classmates, and when they reach marriageable age, she has launched a passionate pursuit of Zhou Bingkun. She said frankly to Bingkun: "Although you look average, your studies are average, and you are in a broken garbage middle school like me, but you are a good child when you are young, and you are never naughty." ”
Although Bingkun didn't have much affection for Chunyan, after hearing these words, he felt a little uncomfortable in his heart. Because he doesn't want others to see him as too ordinary, although he does feel that he is not good enough compared to his older siblings. Chunyan also expressed her criteria for choosing a mate: "I still have a certain standard in finding a partner, I don't dare to be too high, but I don't want to look down on myself first."
What's wrong with the light word piece? Are we inferior when we were born in a light word film? You said no? Actually, I'm looking for someone to work in a wood processing factory, not far from where I work. Every day at work, he accompanied me to the door of our bath, and waited for me at the door of our bath after work. ”
Bingkun immediately responded: "I don't work in the lumber mill anymore, I have gone to the soy sauce factory." Although Chunyan was a little dissatisfied with Zhou's mother not telling her the news, she still chose to follow Bingkun. When asked if Zhou's mother and Qiao's mother often discussed him together, Chunyan said in an unfathomable tone: "It's not just about you, what's the point of only talking about you?" They often talk about us together. ”
This answer surprised Bingkun, who realized that he might have been calculated by Chunyan. Since that day, Bingkun has always turned a deaf ear to Chunyan's words. Whenever Chunyan talked to him, he just pretended to be deaf and dumb, as if everything had nothing to do with him. After returning home, he relayed Chunyan's words to his mother, and his ** was obvious: "You are not allowed to match us with her mother in private, even if she is willing, I am not willing." ”
Surprisingly, the mother was full of praise for Chunyan: "When two mothers get together, they will naturally talk about their children's marriage. Why, do you still want to restrict your mother's freedom of speech? Chunyan's girl is really good, she is a benchmark figure in the unit, and she is hung on the wall as a demonstration. She is a girl who pursues progress, maybe next year she can be named a model in the city's service industry, if there is a day, she may even become a model in the province and the country. At that time, the profession of pedicure would also become glorious and respected because of her. ”
Bingkun muttered: "No matter what title she gets, what achievements she achieves, it has nothing to do with me." Even if she is rated as a thousand-armed Guanyin and becomes a rare ginseng fruit in the world, it will not be able to touch my heart. In fact, Bingkun's position has been very clear, he doesn't have any feelings for Chunyan, his heart is not on Chunyan.
However, the mother was very satisfied with Chunyan. In her eyes, her son was not outstanding, neither smart nor able to achieve much in his career. Being able to marry a good girl like Chunyan is already a very ideal result. Moreover, the two families know each other, and Chunyan often comes to visit her mother at home, bringing her all kinds of care and consideration, which makes her mother extremely satisfied with Chunyan. She turned a deaf ear to her son's objections, and instead secretly planned their marriage with Chunyan's mother.
Although Chunyan and Bingkun had been classmates in elementary and middle school and lived on the same street, they never went to and from school together. Bingkun is not the kind of boy who likes to play with girls, and in his memory, Chunyan when he was a child was not beautiful and could not attract the attention of boys. As time passed, Chunyan gradually showed the charm of a woman, and even when she came to Bingkun's house after dressing up, even his friends were attracted to her.
But all this did not change Bingkun's opinion of Chunyan, and he never had a special feeling for Chunyan. He knew Chunyan too well, and because he knew too well, he couldn't have a heartbeat for her. The single young people present were all interested in Chunyan, but Bingkun was unmoved. He knew Chunyan too well that he could tell how many layers of hoarfrost she had rubbed on her face behind her elaborate grooming. However, that night, the relationship between Chunyan and Bingkun underwent a subtle change.
Because that night, Chunyan met Cao Debao. She suddenly realized that she didn't really like Bingkun, but felt that he was loyal and suitable for life. And meeting Cao Debao made Chunyan experience the feeling of being a girl with spring. So, that night, Chunyan skillfully seduced Cao Debao, and later became his wife, allowing Bingkun to escape her love network.
Chunyan's devotion to Cao Debao can be said to be love at first sight, or it can be said to be lustful. Also as a young man, Bingkun also had a desire in his heart, but his target was not Chunyan, but Xu Zhiqiang's widow - Zheng Juan. When Bingkun first met Zheng Juan, she didn't apply powder, her hair was fluffy, and she was a little helpless and shy when she saw his sudden visit. Bingkun was not only amazed by her beauty, but also felt that she was somewhat similar to her sister. It's just that she has less bookishness, but a little more hardships and fears in life. Her appearance is enough to arouse any man's pity and pity, and Zhou Bingkun is naturally no exception.
Since that day, Bingkun seems to have changed as a different person. He is no longer inferior and lost because of his background. Zheng Juan's beauty and weakness made him feel love and pity. He began to think about her, and the intertwining of desire and pity made him unable to extricate himself.
He no longer feels inferior because of his job choices and status as a coolie, nor does he feel guilty because of his sister's behavior, nor is he afraid of Tu Zhiqiang's nightmare. Back at home, his thoughts always revolved around Zheng Juan. When he first saw her at Zheng Juan's house, a wild, almost uncontrollable urge surged in his heart to crush her on the kang. If she is submissive, he will gladly accept it; If she resists, he may do so until she gives in.
Zhou Bingkun has always had a strong curiosity and sympathy for Zheng Juan, the young widow. The reason why he agreed to help someone send her money was largely because he was curious about this woman. What unmarried young man like him, who has never had any intimate contact with a woman, would not be curious? What's more, she's already a little widow! And he still went to give her money, which was forty yuan, a lot of money.
However, when he actually stood in front of Zheng Juan, the curiosity and sympathy in his heart were instantly replaced by strong impulses. At that time, his compassion was like a tender grass in his heart, and the impulse was as fierce as a flamethrower. He understood that there were three reasons why his sympathy was swept away by impulsive emotions: first, Zheng Juan's beauty was beyond his imagination, this kind of beauty was what he dreamed of, and he had never met such a woman in real life; Secondly, she was disheveled and unadorned, which constituted an unprecedented opposite sex ** to him; In the end, a strong indignation surged in his heart, he was not satisfied that Tu Zhiqiang's woman was so beautiful.
He couldn't help but think, whether it was his family background or the impression he gave people, what was so special about Tu Zhiqiang? Is he not as good as him? He asked himself if he had a bad record. At first, he thought she was humble—married to a young man with a bad record, only to become the widow of an executed murderer. Isn't that a testament to humility? Her unquestionable humility made him feel superior.
But when Zheng Juan, Zheng Juan's old mother, and the blind brother appeared in front of him, he suddenly realized that there was endless suffering in this world. Those who have suffered so much, they deserve sympathy, and those sufferings and helplessness make him realize how lucky he is. That day, Zheng Juan's mother begged him for money, and Zheng Juan's brother knelt down in front of him, and he was grateful for Zheng Juan's brother's knees. Because Bingkun confessed a truth: when others kneel in front of you and plead, it seems to be the humility of others, but after thinking deeply, it may not be the contempt of others for you, but their gift to you. This makes you more aware of who you really are.
Yes, Bingkun was deeply touched by the encounter with Zheng Juan. The society taught him a lesson, and the experience of Zheng Juan's family was like a picture scroll, showing the helpless fate of the people at the bottom of that era. This made Bingkun feel inexplicable sadness for the first time. He couldn't forget Zheng Juan, and every time he thought about it, he was fascinated. He was fascinated by her beauty, which sparked the most primitive desires in his heart, which Chunyan could not give.
Chunyan is always smug in front of Bingkun, with a swaggering demeanor. As the pacesetter of the unit, she is very proud, and she often shows off in front of Bingkun. And Bingkun just said sluggishly: "Chunyan, I am also a person who loves the people, really, so I also respect you from the bottom of my heart." He respects Chunyan, but he doesn't have the slightest love.
However, Zheng Juan is completely different. She was a murderer's woman, a young widow with an old mother and a blind brother, and her husband's widow. She is so pitiful, in a difficult situation, and needs someone to save her. Facing Zheng Juan, Bingkun's inner hero complex was ignited. He longed to be the hero she needed, a guardian who could save her from fire and water.
The feeling of being adored, it is a deep satisfaction, a manifestation of self-worth. Feel that you are a person who has the ability to protect others and can also be an important person in someone's life. Facing Zheng Juan, Bingkun felt that he was tall, he had a natural sense of superiority, and that male desire to protect burned in his heart. He fell in love with Zheng Juan, and this kind of affection can't be found in Chunyan.
Zheng Juan said to him: "You are a noble person in our family of three, especially my nobleman, I should be very good to you." However, Bingkun denied that he was a nobleman, and he emphasized that the two people who gave him money were really expensive. When Zheng Juan asked him why he was so kind to her, Bingkun replied almost ruthlessly: "It's a woman like you!" It's you! For more than a year, I've been thinking about one woman, and that's you! Now you get the idea, right? I'm not your nobleman! I don't want you to think I'm a good person! I'm good to you because you make me think about you all the time, and I can't forget you by any means! ”
At that moment, Zheng Juan also admitted that she thought about him the same, and she comforted Bingkun and said that there was nothing to be ashamed of, it was much better to say it than to be bored in her heart. She slowly raised her head, with tears on her face, and stretched out her arm to him and said, "Hold me." As if he had been electrocuted by a fire, he immediately jumped to his feet. Before he could hug her, he was hugged by her all of a sudden. Her lips kissed him passionately on the face, while she kept murmuring: "My nobleman, my good man, my benefactor, I want my body to you, I want you, my body wants you."
That night, Zhou Bingkun owned Zheng Juan, and his body and mind were satisfied with Zheng Juan. Zheng Juan not only satisfied his most primitive desires, but also satisfied his spiritual sense of heroism, the feeling of being needed and worshipped. Later, Zheng Juan told Zhou Bingkun what happened to her, and it turned out that the child was not Tu Zhiqiang's, but the tall man who asked him to send money, and Tu Zhiqiang was just a disguise.
After listening to everything that happened to Zheng Juan, Bingkun felt that his body was hollowed out, and he was full of anger. Later, when he saw the two men who gave the money again, he almost strangled the tall man to death. In the end, the two people who sent the money went to prison, and Bingkun and Zheng Juan's lives returned to peace.
Bingkun realized that the ** of the money he gave Zheng Juan every month had been broken, and he could no longer take out his salary, because that would arouse his mother's suspicion and make her find out that his salary was less. So, he made the difficult decision to secretly sell the family's heirloom bracelet. This bracelet was originally a precious legacy left by his parents, but now, for the sake of Zheng Juan and their future, he has to do it. After some twists and turns, he successfully sold the bracelet and got 1,200 yuan. Every month, he will use the money to fund Zheng Juan.
The separation during this period made him even more determined to marry Zheng Juan. He understands that as a man, if he truly loves a woman, he should bear everything about her, including the difficulties and troubles she faces. He is ready and willing to give everything for Zheng Juan. He also knows that marrying Zheng Juan means more responsibilities and challenges, but he believes that they can overcome all difficulties together and create a better future together.