Normal family of love and affection, please ignore this article, if you have a friend who is confused and troubled, you can read it carefully.
As a result of our culture, many people naturally and invariably choose to ignore it automatically when faced with abnormal family relationships, like ostriches, poking their heads into the sand, pretending not to see it, not to happen, and unwilling to think about the unreasonable places.
Even in the 24 filial piety, Guo Ju buries his children, this kind of dehumanized burial of his children and serving his mother, can be regarded as a classic of filial piety, which is a real crime.
In order to save food, he killed a 3-year-old child, and the family belonged to him, a big man, who ate the most, so why didn't he die? Does this have anything to do with filial piety? Bullying the soft and afraid of the hard, you have to paint eyebrows and beautify them into filial piety?
The mosquitoes are full of blood, and the old man lies comfortably and comfortably on the bed, letting his eight-year-old son feed the mosquitoes naked, how can he sleep?
In the name of filial piety, it is actually a knife for killing. What kind of human nature can be distorted into to make up this kind of dross and poison people's hearts?
Things don't cease to exist just because they're blindfolded, and if you keep running away, things will gradually become out of control and unrecognizable.
When a psychologist expressed his views in a deafening manner, it was like thunder on the ground, which made many parents angry and angry.
Especially when he said "China's filial piety is foolish filial piety", it was like a stone startling a thousand waves, and two fingers popped up ten thousand sounds.
He believes that under the culture of filial piety in our country, there are too many personal tragedies and family tragedies, which need to be vigilant.
Personally, I agree, and I also think that the emotion of "love" between parents and children, which should be born naturally and naturally revealed, has to be called "gratitude" and "filial piety", which is essentially a kind of moral kidnapping and emotional blackmail from top to bottom, which is very selfish.
Parents love their children, and children naturally love their parents, which is the natural law of human emotion. There is no need to kidnap in one more move, unless the parents have another purpose for giving birth to children, or they have not fulfilled even the most basic obligation to raise them, and they are weak in their hearts, afraid that they will not be able to control their children, and they are even more afraid that they will not be able to get the filial piety of their children.
The foolish filial piety mentioned by the expert is summarized and judged from the general manipulative behavior of Chinese parents towards their children.
Any kind of power in the world needs to be supervised and controlled, including the desire for power embodied by parents in their children, once excessive, children will be harmed.
Ordinary people have no status in society, no sense of existence, and are not valued by society, and this sense of powerlessness can be perfectly compensated for when they return home, and children unconditionally worship their parents and attach themselves to their parents, which brings incomparable satisfaction to the psychology of parents.
It cannot be denied that many people do not really love their children when they have children, but love the strong and perfect self in the eyes of their children.
Power is addictive, and once ordinary people taste this taste, they can't stop trying to find ways to hold power firmly in their hands and never let go.
In reality, there are many people who are manipulated by their parents, such as Ma Bao Nan, Fu Di Demon, etc., sadly, many of these people are not sober and self-aware, and continue to choose self-deception and not bravely face the real situation.
There is another kind that people have more experience when they reach middle age, that is, many middle-aged people in society seem to have disappeared.
Many of them are forced to stay at home to care for their elderly parents, giving up their lives, jobs, lives, families, and children, and staying with their parents almost all the time, waiting for the call, physically and mentally exhausted.
What's more, many children walk in front of their parents after they are tired and falling, and the white-haired people send the black-haired people. Although such children have earned the name of filial piety, what does filial piety bring to them?
It's right to love your parents, is it normal to love to the point of losing your physical and mental health, losing your life, or even losing your life? Can parents bear it? How should each of us view filial piety? How to provide for the elderly? These are all important questions in life that are worth pondering.
In fact, it is undeniable that there are some mainstream phenomena of non-filial piety in reality, such as being born but not raised. When the old and the frail come to their children to ask for support and service; Hitting and scolding children, severely suppressing and controlling them, resulting in serious mental trauma for children, and even suffering from various mental and psychological diseases, it is difficult to break free for a lifetime, and their lives are ruined.
In the lives of many people, the bad fate comes from the closest people. Only friends who are deeply involved in it can feel deeply, and those who have not experienced it cannot experience it at all.
We are taught from a young age to listen to our parents and listen to our teachers, which is true, but not absolutely true.
Because, what if the words of the parents and teachers are wrong? Parents and teachers are also human beings, and if they are human beings, they are not perfect, how can all words be 100% correct? Asking children to be filial is the beginning of tragedy.
The only memory of the Karamay fire was "Let the leader go first.""！The fire claimed the lives of 323 people, including 284 children under the age of 18. Do you still need to listen to such words?
Let the leaders go first! "Just five words in one sentence can make nearly 300 young people lose their precious lives, and how many families are miserable.
Tell yourself and your children that on the premise of not breaking the law and harming the interests of others, you should protect your own life and safety first, rather than giving priority to the right to life.
If it is not conducive to growth, security, etc., it is right not to obey.
In front of parents, children should try not to blindly obey in order to not blindly obey in society. Because social relations are the projection of family relationships.
And foolishness and filial piety, in essence, stifles the possibility of a life expanding outward, and is only a method of cultivating slaves. People who often talk about filial piety are undoubtedly sad.
Minors, their mental maturity is not enough, can not distinguish the correctness of parents' words and behavior, children imitate their parents' behavior and thoughts to shape their individual personality.
At this time, it fully reflects how important it is to be a parent's own cultivation, vision, and pattern, which can indeed affect the child's life.
It is enough to destroy a person and make him foolish.
Everyone makes mistakes, parents do, and children do. Adults should have the intellect to allow children to make mistakes, and the ability to educate and guide them.
Too many children who do wrong things are beaten and scolded by their parents, but parents do wrong things but almost no one manages them.
Parents should cultivate their children's normal and stable personality foundation, correct their children's bad behavior, and guide their children to adapt to society well.
Adult children, when their parents behave inappropriately, such as hurting others with words, harming the interests of others, etc., they must not blindly follow, do not follow, and keep sober and deal with it properly, this is great love, love with a pattern. Don't take your parents' wrong standards as your own.
Foolishness is not respect, let alone love, but the loss of the ability to think, blind and stupid; Asking your children to be filial is not love, let alone for your good, just control.