Today, let's briefly talk about what are the common mistakes in recovery?I hope that what I have said can enhance everyone's awareness in the process of recovery.
First of all, the first one is, to entangle each other;
Although this topic is a cliché, I still want to mention it, that is, everyone should not get the meaning of entanglement wrong.
There are some situations where we do need to behave towards our ex, and if you don't do anything, it means you don't have a chance at all.
At this time, some people must have doubts, whether to find an ex or not?
There is a criterion for judging here, which is entanglement.
Entanglement also means that your various behaviors have crossed the boundaries of what the other person can bear, even if your situation can make some reparative moves to the ex, but it is also carried out on the basis of respecting the other party's wishes.
Then many of us can't grasp this balance, but blindly text each other, begging for reunion, and without good results, they keep escalating your level of harassment, so your behavior will not be of much help to recover.
At the same time, I also want to say that when the other party just broke up, it didn't mean that the mood was good, so at this time, the sensitivity to your entanglement will be higher, and your behavior should be as thoughtful as possible when you recover.
The second is to belittle oneself and try to win the sympathy of the other party
It is normal to have negative psychology and negative emotions after a breakup.
But I suggest that you don't try to win the sympathy of your ex through these behaviors, because your ex will only think that you are a muddy person who can't hold up the wall, and it is right to separate from you early, and he will deny you as a person.
There is a small cognitive difference in this that many people may not be aware of.
The reason why you think it is useful to win the sympathy of the other party is that you are still treating your ex the way you handled it when you were in love, because when you were in love before, you were sad and sad, and the other party would come to comfort you, so you also have this habitual thinking.
But after the breakup, this thinking is useless, because the identity of the other party has changed after the breakup, if this time comes to appease you,That's withtaThis identity does not match, so taI won't continue to do what I did when I was in love.
At the same time, your behavior reminds the other party that breaking up with you is the right thing to do, because you can't bear a little blow, so decadent, and the value is very low.
The third is blind disconnection
I don't need to say more about the harm of this, many people know that blind disconnection may make you miss the opportunity to recover.
I'm going to talk about just one kind of person here todayIt is a person who is afraid to move forward.
Because after a breakup, you will eventually encounter setbacks and difficulties in the face of your ex. If you choose to retreat and disconnect at this time, that's right, you have avoided the head-on conflict for the time being, you don't have to face the conflict, you think it's goodBut you are also choosing to give up the opportunity.
That's why I've always said that before disconnecting, think clearly about it according to your situation, and you really need to disconnect before you break it.
To do this, you need to calm down and analyze your situation. At the same time, you can refer to some emotional knowledge and have an overall understanding of feelings, so that you can grasp whether you need to disconnect.
Although everyone knows the mistakes in the recovery, not everyone can do it well, and the advice I give is to figure out why these ways don't work, and then internalize them in combination with your own understanding, and internalize them is what belongs to you.
Redemption