Habits are a major factor that affects our happiness in life, and if we want to have a better life, we must face up to our habits, which are called inertia.Studies have shown that more than 40% of people's daily activities are the product of habits, rather than their own voluntary decisions. Waking up in the morning, brushing your teeth and washing your face, to driving to work have become automatic behaviors that don't require much brain.Zhang Defen.
Deep in our brain, near the brainstem, there is an oval-shaped tissue the size of a golf ball made up of nerve cells called the basal nucleus. It controls our voluntary behaviors, such as breathing and swallowing. It is because of the presence of the basal nucleus that it stores a series of behavioral habits that we have.
Our brain turns a series of behaviors into an automatic habitual behavior, which is the basis for habit formation.
Let's take driving as an example. When we first learn to drive, we are always careful: take a deep breath, open the door, adjust the seat, fasten the seatbelt, insert the key in, light the light, put on the forward gear, release the handbrake, then tap the accelerator, glance at the driving speed on the dashboard, and then set off at a very slow pace, check the rearview mirror, left and right mirrors from time to time, mentally estimate the distance to the car in front, and be careful to avoid the fast approaching vehicle.
When you're proficient, you hardly think about how to operate every time you drive, everything just goes naturally. This habitual behavior becomes a habit. The basal nucleus of the brain gets a cue when you take out your car keys and starts to automatically identify the habits associated with driving. Once the habit kicks in, the brain starts thinking about other activities. So, we don't delay when we are driving, we listen to the radio, play **.
In the book The Power of Habit, author Charles Duhigg gives the principle of how habits work: the habit circuit. The process of habit formation in the brain is a three-step circuit: the first step, there is a hint that allows the brain to enter a certain automatic pattern of behavior and decide which habit to use; In the second step, there is a habitual behavior, which can be physical, mental, emotional; The third step is the reward, allowing the brain to tell if it should write down the circuit for future use.
When we understand how habit loops work, we can more easily control and modify habits. Then we can also transform our habits in a three-step way.
The first step is to find the rewards that drive the behavior
For most people, picking up a mobile phone in their spare time to swipe for a short ** has become a habit of life. In the continuous brushing, our brain has obtained an unprecedented sense of pleasure, commonly known as "** music". So, when we have a little bit of free time, our brains start to anticipate the reward, and even though you still have a lot of work to do, you can't help but open it when you see your phone.
It is this expectation of reward that fuels our thirst. So, we try to find ways to satisfy that craving. This may explain why many people put their phones in the living room instead of at the head of the bed before going to bed to overcome the bad habit of looking at their phones at night.
What we crave is not the habit itself, but the satisfaction and state change it brings.
So, when you're trying to overcome a bad habit, first ask yourself: What is the reward I get from this habit? For example, for people who want to quit smoking, smoking is due to social necessity or to a strong sense of stimulation. Studies have shown that if smoking is a stimulus, then drinking a cup of coffee has the same effect and can increase your chances of quitting successfully.
Or take the short ** as an example, what is the reward we get from the non-stop brushing**? It may be to relax quickly, to acquire useful knowledge, or to fill the emptiness in your heart. Through constant self-questioning, we find our own reward and are able to change our habitual behavior.
The way to change your habits is simple, and that's the second step that comes next: replace the old habit with a new one.
The second step is to replace the old habit with a new one
Our brains are malleable and follow the principle of what is used and what is lost.
The so-called 21 days to form a habit From the perspective of brain science, through 21 days of continuous persistence, the connections between neurons in the brain will become closer and closer until a habit is formed. 21 days is the minimum time period to measure how well neurons are connected in the brain.
Therefore, habits cannot be eliminated, but can only be replaced.
And the resources of our brain are limited, and the formation of one habit will inevitably occupy the resources of another. So, it's equally difficult to form a new habit and to change an old one. Think about it, isn't it hard for you to get into the habit of getting up at 6 a.m. every morning to exercise? And is it equally difficult for you to overcome the habit of brushing short ** every night before going to bed?
When we want to change a habit, we are not really eliminating the old habit but replacing the old habit with a new one. Or take the short ** as an example, if the reward for the brush ** is to pass the boring time. Then, we can use other habits instead of brushing. For example, when you are bored between work, you can quickly relax by practicing breathing meditation, doing Sudoku or even work exercises.
Making our substitute habits permanent is the next step in the third step: making the habit a spontaneous awareness.
The third step is to turn habits into spontaneous awareness
The famous "Water Brother" Wang Yuheng once said: "For everything that is easy to make people addicted, never touch."
This habit has become the spontaneous behavior of "Brother Shui", and there is no need for a fierce ideological struggle. Because he knows what he wants and what he wants to be.
Many times, we make plans for ourselves, check in all kinds of check-ins, make lists, and change our "micro-habits", in fact, these changes are our behavior system, but if you don't know what kind of person you want to be, without identity, there is a high probability that your habit transformation will fail.
If we want to make lasting changes, we need to focus on ourselves: what kind of person do we want to be?
Now think about it: How do you want others to judge you? In other words, what is your ultimate goal in life? When you understand what kind of person you want to be and what you want to be in life, the success of change will be greatly improved.
Zhang Hui, the author of "Hui Ge Qi Tan", said that busyness and boredom will swallow up modern people's pursuit of a sense of meaning, because we spend a lot of time here, and during these time periods, we do not pursue the meaning of life, nor do we explore the meaning of life.
When we understand the meaning of life, know our ultimate goal, and believe that we can get better, the habitual circuit we have reformed will slowly turn into spontaneous behavior, until it becomes a permanent behavior. Dynamic Incentive Plan in February Truly recognize yourself, find your goals, keep a moment, stick to it, and you will find yourself reborn as a brand new person.