Husband
We have been married for eleven years, and I filed the idea of divorce, and I worked so hard that I didn't give her a day, but she didn't understand me at all, and she knew all day long to complain and make trouble for me, which annoyed me very much.
For so many years, I have treated her well, I will send money to the family on time every month, she is just helping to do some housework, watching a child, watching an old man, what is there to dissatisfaction with, she is an old woman, what is there to complain about? She's not as good as my friend's wife, I can't take it anymore, I'm going to leave her with nothing. ”
Seeing this private letter, the author sighed.
For most people, the contents of this letter may come as a shock, but in reality, it is a very common thing.
When a man has achieved fame and made some money, he will abandon his wife and leave her with nothing.
This kind of man is often selfish, he doesn't know how to appreciate women's efforts at all, and he says that his women are not as good as other women, but he doesn't know how big the gap between himself and others is.
They could never have imagined that their wives had fallen to this point today because of them.
As the saying goes, "A virtuous man must have a virtuous man." ”
He was convinced of this.
Whether the wife is good or not, look at the husband.
A woman without feelings, her husband will not achieve much.
In real life, there are often men who complain that their wives are sloppy, domineering, and sloppy, and some men look like they are rejecting people thousands of miles away.
But in fact, all women in the world are beauty-loving, and the reason why they are so unkempt is mostly forced by life.
If a person's survival is in question, then they have no time to worry about other things.
Life is not only about dreams, but also about reality.
Sometimes, a woman also wants romance and wants to go back to the past, but she has no choice.
is just like the love between Shen Congwen and Zhang Zhaohe.
Maybe many people know that Shen Congwen who "walked through thousands of mountains and rivers, watched white clouds countless times, and only fell in love with one person in his life".
And Mr. Ye Shengtao also said: "The four talented people of the Zhang family in Jiuru Lane, which one can marry this girl, will be happy for life", Zhang Zhaohe, few people know.
At that time, people did not have much hope for the combination of Shen Congwen and Zhang Zhaohe.
Because of the right family, Shen Congwen was only a teacher at that time, Zhang Zhaohe's family background was prominent, and there were many people who pursued him.
However, Zhang Zhaohe chose to marry and married Shen Congwen, who had nothing.
Zhang Zhaohe was originally a beautiful girl, pampered since he was a child, and he was clothed and fed. After marrying Shen Congwen, she took on the responsibility of the family "from luxury to frugality".
After she gave birth and was busy with housework, she cut her hair short.
Shen Congwen blamed her for this, and repeatedly asked Zhang Zhaohe to have long hair, wear high heels, and dress himself, but he didn't understand her pain at all, let alone help her.
At that time, Zhang Zhaohe wrote a very angry letter to Shen Congwen:
I don't want me to wear high heels, I don't want to perm my hair, I don't want to wash things, I don't want to work, I don't care if it's good or bad.
It is precisely because of this trivial trivial matter that Shen Congwen's dislike for Zhang Zhaohe is increasing day by day, so he chooses to be disloyal.
Shen Congwen has never liked Zhang Zhaohe, he only likes the eldest lady of the Zhang family, and the eldest lady of the Zhang family, after becoming his wife, he no longer has any hope.
His wife did not meet his expectations, but he felt that his wife had changed, but he didn't know that it was all his fault.
If he could do something for this family and help her share the pain in her life, she wouldn't end up like this.
After all, everyone wants to be able to live comfortably, and if they can, how can they want to live in poverty.
A woman who likes to whine will usually have a husband who is cold to her.
There is a good saying: "The saddest thing about a marriage is not that no one loves you, but that you treat all the indifference, all the indifference, as ** love." ”
He was convinced of this.
In real life, many men will complain that their wives are resentful and find fault at every turn.
But in fact, most women are because of their husbands.
Being ignored by her husband for a long time, ignored by her husband, ignored by her husband, and disrespected by her husband has made a great change in women.
This kind of man, devoted himself to work, puts all his thoughts on work, does not care about his wife at all, feels that his wife is a housekeeper, and going home with his salary is the best reward for his wife, and he can enjoy it with peace of mind.
But in fact, this family has never been just one woman, but two people.
It is not easy for a woman to take care of housework, she has to do housework, and she has to go up and down the kitchen, up and down, down and down, up and down, big and small, all of which add up to much harder than going out to work.
The reason why they become housewives is not because they are afraid of fatigue, but because they want their families to live a better life.
After giving everything but not getting the other party's understanding and response, it will explode.
So, they will complain to their husbands, even lose their temper, because they have a child in their hearts and want to tell them, "I'm so sad, so helpless, you come and hug me." ”
If your emotions and needs are invisible to your husband, but your husband is indifferent, then the more you will hate.
It has been said, "True love is not about supporting each other, but about fulfilling each other." ”
A relationship, if it is just a woman's wishful thinking, is definitely going to go wrong.
If a woman's desires last for a long time and she does not get his approval, then she will despair and even give up everything she has to destroy the relationship.
Because the more people give, the more they will ask for the same thing, and if they don't get it, they will feel unfair.
Love is essentially an exchange of "feelings", while marriage is an exchange of "values", which makes love essentially a mutually beneficial relationship.
The longevity of a marriage depends on whether both parties are able to consistently bring "value" to each other.
A woman, if she is always sullen and complaining, it is not unreasonable, she just wants the comfort of a man, a man, should understand this truth.
Women are not omnipotent people, and they also need the care and attention of men.
When a man sees a woman complaining, you have to take good care of the woman, because she can't stand it anymore.
If a man can understand a woman's needs and is willing to share her ups and downs, then the woman will be better.
A woman's happiness depends on her husband, and her happiness depends on her husband.
No one wants to be a woman, and no one wants to be someone they don't like.
As a woman, she will have enough strength to support her when she sees her needs, she will tell her needs, and she will be brave enough to say "no" to her.
This way, you can see yourself clearly and take the initiative in your marriage.