"At the beginning, I thought it was good to have 2 sons, but in the future, I relied on it, but now it seems that I have to work hard to be 70 years old.
The saddest thing is that the two sons are unwilling to take on the responsibility of providing for the elderly because of each other's blame, and it is estimated that it will be very difficult to rely on their sons to support the elderly in the future. ”
Hello everyone, I'm Li Wensheng, 56 years old.
During this time, my wife and I were still busy working outside every day, and I worked on the construction site, even if the salary was small and the work was tiring, I had to grit my teeth and continue to work.
My wife helped others pick branches in the orchard, picked fruits down the mountain, and could earn two or three hundred yuan after working hard for more than ten hours a day.
It's hard work, but there's no way, after all, you owe so much foreign debt, how can you pay it back if you don't make money.
I don't know how many of us are now the same as my wife, almost 60, and we have to be busy running around every day, if nothing else, my wife and I will be busy until we are 70 years old.
And the reason for all this is very simple, that is, there are 2 sons in the family, and there are too many things to worry about for them.
I was born in a rural area and have always been a migrant worker in the past.
Everyone knows the habits of the countryside, and in the past, every household made a living from agriculture and was in great need of labor.
Therefore, at that time, everyone generally liked to have more children, especially more boys.
Because there are many men in the family, not only do they have more laborers, but there are also people who work, and even speak louder than others in the village.
I remember my grandparents having five or six children.
In my parents' lifetime, they gave birth to three sons and a daughter.
And in my generation, my parents' request to me is that I don't need more, just have three children, two sons and one daughter are the best.
But by the time I got married, the times didn't allow it, even in the countryside, and it wasn't allowed to have more children.
So I thought, it's good to have two children, and one son and one daughter are not bad.
When I was 26 years old, I had my first child, a boy, and when my son was born, my parents and I were very happy.
Because I feel that I have a son, the second son and daughter are very happy.
Two years later, the youngest son was born, and although the daughter-in-law wanted to be a daughter, my parents and I still thought that the son was also good, and the two brothers would have a companion in the future.
After the birth of our two sons, my wife and I began to live a hard life for nearly 30 years.
When the two children were young, I stayed at home and let my parents take them, and my daughter-in-law and I went to work in the factory, getting up early and working hard to earn money, just to give them a place to study and live.
Frankly speaking, raising 2 children is really tiring, from elementary school to junior high school and high school, just the tuition and living expenses, and textbook fees cost a lot.
Especially after the two sons went to college, the money was even more bottomless, and the two sons went out with tuition and living expenses every year, almost 50,000 yuan.
And my wife and I even work overtime every day in the factory, and the two of us only earn 70,000 or 80,000 yuan a year, which has to deduct our own food expenses and all the expenses of the family.
At that time, my lumbar intervertebral disc was a little herniated, and my wife's cervical spine was often not good.
Although we are bitter, we often cheer each other up and say: It's okay, the children will grow up soon, and when the two sons graduate from college, they will make money, and we will be happy.
My wife also said: When the two sons come out to work, we will go home and stop staying in the factory.
That's right, we didn't stay in the factory later, because after the age of 50, we were older, and the factory didn't want us anymore.
But our life was even more difficult than in the factory before, I went to work on the construction site, and my wife went to find some casual workers.
The reason is very simple, when the two sons grow up, not only will they not make money, but the pressure of getting married and having children, buying a house and buying a car will come to us.
I always thought that when my son graduated and looked for a job, with a salary, we no longer needed us to pay living expenses, and we would be relaxed.
Even my wife fantasized that it would be great if her two sons could give her some money every month, and the money would not be much, 500 per month, and a thousand yuan would be enough to live, just save some flowers.
However, my wife imagined it too well.
The two sons will indeed make money, but the money they can earn is only enough for them to spend on themselves, they are moonlight clansmen every month, and they have been working for so many years, and they have not seen them save some money.
5 years ago, the boss and the partner they had been talking about for many years were ready to get married.
The eldest daughter-in-law's family asked for a bride price of 160,000 yuan, and there had to be a house in the county, otherwise the marriage would not have been successful.
I asked my son and daughter-in-law to discuss that the bride price could be given, but if the house in the county town could wait, and they would make their own money to buy it in the future, I would also help a little.
But instead of facing us, the son made trouble for three days, so that the old couple had to help them pay a down payment first.
can take out 160,000 dowry, which has allowed my wife and me to spend all our savings.
With a down payment of 250,000 yuan, my wife and I were running around, asking many relatives to borrow it with a shy face, which made the boss a family.
According to the courtesy, we borrowed the money for our son, and it should be repaid by our son.
But after marriage, my son said that the salary he earned was only enough to pay off the mortgage, and he had to rely on the two of us to pay it back.
But even so, my son and daughter-in-law didn't seem to be satisfied, thinking that I didn't make enough money to pay off the mortgage for them.
This boss has become a family, which has already made my wife and I feel that we have lost our skin.
But we also have a young son in our family, the older one is going to start a family, and the younger one is not needed
2 years ago, the youngest son was about to get married, and the bride price was discussed, and in the end, it was the same as the eldest one, 160,000 bride price.
In order not to let the second daughter-in-law think that the two of us were partial, we didn't go to bargain.
But for the sake of this 160,000 yuan, the two of us went to a lot of places to prepare the bride price money, and even I don't remember asking how many people have borrowed money and how many IOUs have been written.
But even so, the second child and his daughter-in-law were still unhappy.
Because they think that when the eldest and the eldest daughter-in-law got married, I bought them a house, but when they got married, they could only live in the countryside, which was too eccentric.
The second child once asked me: Dad, they are also sons, why did you buy a house for your brother and not for me.
I can only say in frustration: Son, you don't know the situation at home, how much foreign debt my mother and I owe for the marriage of your two brothers.
Didn't we build a house in the countryside and live comfortably, so we had to go to the city to buy it?
You look at your parents, even if they sell themselves, they can't help you buy a suite anymore.
Although the second child accepted this reality, I could clearly feel their dissatisfaction.
In this regard, my wife and I have moved back to the old house and gave them the new house so that they will not be troubled.
Frankly speaking, although we are tired and we are bitter, if both brothers have filial piety, we still have a trace of relief in our hearts.
But now it seems that it will be difficult to rely on his son to support his old age in the future.
Some time ago, I went to the county seat to see my waist, and I didn't understand many processes in the hospital.
Let the second brother accompany me, the second child said impatiently: My brother is in the county seat, why don't you let my brother take me, how convenient it is for him.
When I arrived at the county seat and called the boss, the boss reluctantly said: My brother lives with you, why don't you let him come out directly, and you have to call me over.
So I was angry, so I didn't bother any son, and we just relied on ourselves.
Nowadays, my wife and I are always a little sad in the dead of night. How did a good day come to be like this?
We took out the account book and calculated, and at the rate at which we are making money now, it is estimated that we will have to save money until we are 70 years old before we can completely repay the money.
Now I have figured it out, I can't blame my son, we can only blame ourselves.
And my personal opinion is that in this era, ordinary families should try not to have 2 sons, because it is easy to bear a heavy burden.
I don't know what you guys think?