Why is my child like this?In fact, the reason is all in the parents!

Mondo Gastronomy Updated on 2024-02-01

We can find out from our observations

Some children behave in the face of guestsVery "social fear"., can only say a few words through the teachings of parents, evenThey will also hide in their roomsSome of the children survived again"People go crazy"., the family will give birthYelling, jumping up and downParents are a headache.

Why is there such a big difference between different children?

Sensitive to touch

Touch is one of the channels for the human body to perceive the outside world, which refers to the nerve cell receptors (mechanoreceptors, temperature receptors, nociceptors) distributed throughout the body** to receive the sensation of pain, temperature, humidity, pressure and vibration from the outside world.

The sense of touch is one of the most important ways we can contact the outside world, and rich tactile stimulation is an indispensable element in the development of children.

Infancy, if the child'sThe demand is not getting enough attention, it will affect the development of the child's sense of touchDestroying a child's sense of securityCauses tactile sensitivity

Therefore, the child is rightThe ability to adapt to the environment is relatively poor, when you have it at homeA lot of people at the timeand he mightFeelings of anxiety and nervousness

There are two outward behaviors of this emotionOne is to be timid and clingy and hide behind his mother.

At the same time, children with a sensitive sense of touchIt is not acceptable to many external stimuli, for example:Don't like or touch others。For example, if a relative wants to hug the child, the child will feel very uncomfortable and avoid it.

And then there is a manifestation of "social fear" and "ignorance".

And the other manifestation is jumping up and down, moving non-stop。Because the child's inner sense of security is not enough, he has to attract the attention of his parents through external behavior, and he will be more "crazy".

It is also very simple to improve tactile sensitivity, and it is generally necessary to followThe principle of voluntary play for children, appropriate intensity, and diverse content, which can be integrated into the gameMassage, squeezing, crawling, tumbling and other movements, for the childEnough deep sensory inputto help him better develop his sense of touch.

Usually alsoPet or cug your child a lot, which is very helpful for emotional stability and the establishment of good interpersonal relationships.

Overprotective or negligent

The mother said "call uncle" and "I wish my uncle a happy new year", and the child will repeat it, otherwiseNever take the initiative to speak

Or maybe keep talking and talkingStartled, yelling, I want all eyes to be on him.

Is this the case with your children?

If the child is youngBeing spoiled too much by the family, and parents don't even need to open their mouths to help their children do things well, so that on the surface it seems to be "loving children". In fact, it harmed the child.

The right thing to do is to use words to guide the child when he wants to do something, such as:"Do you want to drink water?" and "Which cup do you want to use".This kind of discourse.

Only by giving children more opportunities to express themselves can we exercise the development of children's oral muscles and the improvement of their expression ability.

In addition, a lot of children are affectedOver-protection of the family, but when the guests came, the child was not the focus of the family for the time being, and such a gap made himI feel like I've been "left out".

So whenever there is such an opportunity, the child willHave a strong desire to express themselves, desire to be affirmed, and be praised, get the attention or attention of parents.

Each of his unusually active behaviors is almost forcefully conveying a signal:"Look at me!Look at me!That is, what we call "people go crazy".

At this time, do not forcibly stop it, otherwise it may lead to:

Lack of self-confidenceAs soon as the child "performs", the parents do not give the slightest look, or even perfunctory rejection.

"Go, go, adults are talking here, while playing!".”

This tends to beHit your child's self-confidence, so that the child lacks self-confidence on the road to growthEven self-denial and inferiorityDon't dare to express it, every time I express my emotions, I don't get good results, and I will slowly become more and more ashamed to show it in the future, and I no longer dare to express myself.

The personality will also tend to be more introverted and withdrawn, from "people are crazy" to "social fear", which is probably not what parents want to see, the sameIt is very detrimental to the healthy development of children's body and mind

Solution

1. Eliminate closed questions in chats

Talking to children is the most taboo to ask closed-ended questions。For example: Do you think Mom is right?Is today's meal delicious?

This kind of conversation can easily kill the conversation and will have no effect on the child. We can try some open-ended questions, such as:How do you feel after your mom's cooking tonight?What do you think of after watching this cartoon?

This kind of open-ended question leaves more room for children to play. Unlike the previous two problems, it can be solved with just "right", "wrong", "delicious" and "not delicious".

It should be noted that when the child has finished answering the questions,Even if the child says something wrong, we parents should not rush to criticize. Instead, it is guided in a different way.

For example, I think your idea is very interesting, etc., and under the guidance of such language, children will be more willing to talk to us.

2. Professional sensory integration training

Inappropriate parenting styles may also hinder the development of children's language, such as parents over-doting and eating too much liquid food, resulting in childrenOral muscles are not exercised enough, the language expression will be affected.

If the child existsSlurred speech, stuttering, big tongueand other performances, which may make children disliked and ignored by others. Children will naturally becomeAggrieved and afraid, no longer willing to take the initiative to socialize and express.

In this case, you can take the child to a professional sensory integration institution for oral muscle training and related sensory integration training, so as to exercise the child's expression ability, so as to promoteListening, speaking, reading and writing are developed in all aspects

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