As a person born in the 70s of the last century, I have a different experience of the address between husband and wife: I saw old China calling each other "Mr" and "Mrs" from the TV series, and I felt that it was a satire on the powerful; When they hear the Hunan dialect, young couples call each other "old man" and "mother-in-law" without exception, and they feel old and ugly; Seeing that the red men and green women all over the world and even the boys and girls who are in early love are called "husbands" and "wives", I feel even more abusive; And when I saw the northern couple calling each other "the child's father" and "the child's mother", I felt cheesy and instigated.
Until he walked into marriage. While my wife and I were rejoicing at the positive outcome of our marriage after sweet love, the sense of loss brought about by the boring days of firewood, rice, oil and salt quickly hit my heart, and it became stronger and stronger. I was confused, desperate and afraid: is marriage really the grave of love? Could it be that the white-headed old man swore that the alliance was really a true lie for a while? I can't imagine.
And look at our crystallization, the son, everything seems to have become clear and abrupt. All my wife and I have worked hard to create a smart, healthy and beautiful son. In front of us, his every move makes us infinite surprises and novelties in the process of witnessing the eruption, vigor and continuation of life, and his unknown future fills us with endless reverie. Because of my son, I will always be full of hope and enthusiasm for life. When I saw my wife endure the pain of labor and childbirth in October, and when I saw my wife caring for and feeding her child all night long, a sense of gratitude and heartache made me feel a sense of family identity from the bottom of my heart. I know that from the day my son was born, my wife and I have truly merged together and will never be able to leave each other's imprint. Common interests, common aspirations, and common concerns make us bound to share weal and woe. I know that as a responsible father, you have to create a perfect environment for him, and this environment requires the husband and wife to work together to achieve the best index. Compared with this supreme interest for generations, any kind of ethereal romantic feeling is really overshadowed and not worth mentioning.
This is in line with the vulgar saying: marriage is the conversion of love to family affection. I believe that even if I find Zhang Ziyi or Cecilia Cheung as my wife, I will eventually be unable to escape this kind of regular bad luck: when all the ways to accumulate love energy and romance are exhausted, the passion is also exhausted. Without passion, there is no love. And the birth of a son is the strongest chain on the point of family affection.
And at this time, when I think of the titles of "the child's father" and "the child's mother", I think it is really wonderful and appropriate, this title is really real and simple. Because, who can cut off the flesh-and-blood connection between husband and wife through a carrier? Even if you are divorced, you can't call your "husband" and "wife", but your child's father can still call her until she stays for a lifetime. This is indeed a kind of traditional culture in the birthplace of the Central Plains people, and the experience and heartfelt words of the people. Because, what could be more important than a child? It lays down a central principle for the unity of goals and actions of the young couple: in the consensus of the child, the interests of the individual are insignificant.
I believe that it is the constant call of "his father" and "his mother" that will strengthen the sense of identity of the flesh-and-blood connection between the two, so that they can continue to deepen their relationship and remind themselves at any time: for the happiness of their children, they need to maintain their marriage, so the husband and wife need to love each other for a lifetime. Therefore, it is precisely because of this kind of reason, which is more concrete and realistic than all vows, that the couple can tolerate all unsatisfactory disappointments, resolve all bumps and bumps, and finally love each other for a long time.