Original title: When college students are "Dehua" during the holidays, they should first be on the premise of voluntary.
During this year's Spring Festival holiday, "College Student Dehua" has become a group that has attracted much attention on the Internet. After returning home during the winter vacation, these young people took on the responsibility of taking care of their older brothers or sisters' children, so they had a variety of stories and feelings, which sparked widespread discussion and attention.
The title "Dehua" comes from the character Jiang Dehua in the TV series "Parents Love", she is the younger sister of the male protagonist and has to help her busy brother and sister-in-law take care of five children. A particularly classic scene in the play, when Dehua learns that her sister-in-law is pregnant again and anticipates that she will have to take on the responsibility of taking care of the child again, she says: "I'm tired to death!" Not only was the plot impressive, but it also resonated with many people in similar circumstances.
Today, "Dehua" is no longer just a fictional character in TV dramas, but a representative of a group of people in real life. College students returning home during the winter vacation temporarily put down their schoolwork, but instead of taking a complete break, they acted as temporary "nannies" or "caretakers" at home. In this regard, some people complain that they are tired, and some people think that this is not bad. No matter how you evaluate it, the reasons behind this phenomenon are worth **.
On the one hand, in modern society, with the change of family structure and the acceleration of the pace of life, it is difficult for many couples to complete the task of taking care of their children alone. After a year of exhaustion, I finally waited for my younger siblings to come home for the New Year, so I naturally seized every opportunity to temporarily entrust my children to myself for a while. On the other hand, there are also some college students who voluntarily take on this responsibility, either out of a sense of responsibility for their families or to reduce the burden on their older siblings. For them, being able to spend more time with their loved ones and take care of their loved ones during the holidays is a rewarding and unique experience. It can be said that the phenomenon of "college student Dehua" is a microcosm of the changes in the structure and function of the family in contemporary society, and it is also a manifestation of intergenerational mutual assistance.
However, we should also see that young people's holiday should be "Dehua", which should be on the premise of voluntariness, otherwise it may turn from a good thing to a bad thing. It is understandable that older siblings want younger siblings to share the pressure, but if they do not consider the feelings of the other party, shoehorn the child into them, or make them responsible through moral kidnapping, I am afraid it will be difficult to achieve the desired effect.
Having university students help take care of their children during the holidays may affect their original study and rest plans. Although college students bear less social pressure, they also have to face challenges and their own lives. Society can encourage college students to think more about their families, but they can't force them to arrange their time. After all, if college students lose the freedom to organize their own time, they may not be able to enjoy the fun of the holidays and make progress in their studies during the holidays.
Twisted melons are not sweet. For college students who have neither parenting experience nor time arrangements, leaving their children without asking for their opinions will undoubtedly make them feel unhappy and uneasy. Bringing up children with such negativity will greatly reduce the effectiveness of parenting. At the same time, over-reliance on younger siblings to take care of children can also create an imbalance in family relationships. In the long run, this phenomenon may also affect the development of university students, preventing them from accumulating work experience and expanding their contacts in school and society.
For university students who voluntarily choose to become "Teckwah", we should give them sufficient support and encouragement; We should also respect the choices of college students who are not willing to take on this responsibility. And for college students who take the initiative to reach out to their elders, family members may also wish to provide them with some positive feedback, emotionally or financially. After all, babysitting is not an easy task, and they put in the time and effort and should be thanked accordingly.
The phenomenon not only reflects the changes in the contemporary family structure, but also reflects the views of college students on family responsibilities and personal development. In this process, we need to pay attention to the wishes and needs of college students, so as to better understand the phenomenon of "college students" and promote the harmonious development of family relationships. (Lee Hwa-seok).
*: China Youth Daily***