Recently, the rumors of the suicide of the youngest son of the famous writer Li Yiyun in the United States have made everyone feel sad.
Many people dug deep into Li Yiyun's original family and attributed all the responsibility for the child's suicide to the mother who was in an unhealthy mental state.
But family issues aside,Student suicide is not an isolated case, and in recent years, there have been a series of tragedies of student suicide at prestigious schools.
Admitted to a prestigious school that everyone envies, they have a bright futureWhat hurdles did you encounter that you couldn't get over, and finally chose to die in a tragic way?
The Ivy League school became a 'suicide highland' for studentsAs soon as 2024 entered the year, bad news came from New York UniversityTwo young students at the Manhattan campus have died.
Jacqueline Beauzile, a 19-year-old student, died in her room in her Lipton Hall dormitory on Feb. 8.
Two days later, 18-year-old Doreah Salti jumped from a window on the fifth floor of the Barney Building, and although she was rushed to the hospital, she was ultimately unable to resuscitate her.
In mid-October last year,Giovanna Canonici, a sophomore international student at Barnard College at Columbia University, has passed away after she was reported to have suffered from severe depression.
Previously, she seemed so positive, full of enthusiasm and curiosity about astronomy, rocketry, and space science. She works as a scientific researcher at Columbia University and also joins the Columbia University Space Program Organization.
Her mentor also had high hopes for her, but unfortunately her young life eventually fell.
In May 2022, the body of Jazz Chang, a 21-year-old Chinese student at Princeton University, was found at the school's Carnegie Lake.
During the same period, there have been three student suicides at Princeton University.
They are talented, have a wide range of interests, and have excellent grades, some of them have participated in many activities on and off campus, some have won many scholarships, and some are only a few months away from graduation.
But the shadow of suicide seems to loom over these elite university students.
According to statistics, more than 20 Yale students have committed suicide in the past 10 years. Among them are Luchang Wang, a sophomore from China, and Rae Na Lee, an Asian student.
According to Columbia University's statistics, there were five cases in 2017, which was the highest peak of student suicides on campus. In recent years, the number of student suicides has increased year by year, and the average age has been decreasing.
A spate of student suicides has occurred in a 100-foot-deep canyon near Cornell University, making Cornell University known as the School of Suicide.
In a survey conducted in 2011 that included 13 universities,:MIT has the highest suicide rate among students, Harvard University has the second, and Princeton University has declined to provide data on student suicides.
According to the survey,From 2000 to 2020, more than 30 MIT and Harvard students chose to end their lives.
It is no exaggeration to say that almost every year there is news of suicide among Ivy League students.
The world-renowned Ivy League school has made countless students bend their waists, and it seems that stepping into the gate of the Ivy League school is accompanied by flowers and applause to the peak of life.
But on the other side of elite schools, countless young lives of students have been buried.
The Ivy League is not only a halo, but also a curseThe Ivy League School is certainly the ceiling of the academic palace, attracting countless talented cows to bend their waists.
But under the so-called "halo of famous schools", are there still some "executioners" hidden in the shadows that we can't see?
1.The Ivy League culture of stress is rife
Elite schools are places where elite students gather, and Ivy League schools gather the brightest minds in the world.
Smart people have a characteristic, that is, they are more conceited, they can't accept that others are better than themselves, so they have to roll themselves up better.
Zuckerberg's Chinese-American wife, Priscilla Chen, in an interview with CNNRecalling his experience when he was a student at Harvard, he admits that "when I first came to Harvard, I felt like a failure."
There has always been a "stress culture" in Ivy League schoolsMake learning a priority, even over eating, sleeping, and exercising.
A culture of stress has given rise to a variety of hidden "rules", such as:Columbia University's "free time calculator". Through precise calculations, Columbia students are only allowed to have 1. per day5 hours of free time.
A survey of psychologists at the University of Pennsylvania has uncovered a particular campus culture called Penn Face.
That is, no matter when and where, no matter how sad or anxious the mood is, the students will show a very happy and confident appearance.
A 2019 study statedPrinceton University, which is ranked first overall, has the lowest average GPA among Ivy League schools.
The extremely strict grading system makes students more hysterical in their learning, and the GPA is like a carrot hanging above their heads, constantly running forward and learning.
2.Selfish American elite schools
Just like the two students who died by suicide at New York University, the university has been slow to respond to the truth, even though the public already knows the truth of the matter.
Student suicide is the biggest pain and scandal in the school, and for the sake of profit, the school will only write the specific cause of death in the accident, and avoid talking about suicide.
As a result, student suicide at an elite university was ignored by the outside world, in the illusion of a perfect ivory tower, until it became more and more intense and was finally discovered by the outside world.
Even more excessively,Yale University forced dozens of students to drop out in 2022, blatantly discriminating against students with mental illnessThese students have to resort to the law in order to protect their rights and interests.
In addition, there are:Brown University has rejected readmission applications for students with mental health conditions five times in a row, Dartmouth College has forced students with suicidal tendencies to withdraw from school, and Columbia University has coaxed students with bipolar disorder to take "voluntarily" vacations.
According to the latest evaluation report of the Ruderman Family FoundationAlmost all of the counseling offices at the eight Ivy League schools are at a "failing" level.
The highest-rated Penn University also only has a D+ rating, and the rest are D or even lower. Among them, Yale and Dartmouth colleges have received "F" grades, but the school has not made substantial changes so far.
Just imagine, when students need support and help the most, in the face of the school's indifferent and selfish attitude and inaction, will their last straw for survival be crushed?
3.Elites who are overly perfectionist
In 2022, Katie Meyer, a 22-year-old star football captain at Stanford University, was found to have committed suicide in her dorm room. This caused a great sensation at the time.
Meyer's parents mentioned when they learned the reason for their daughter's suicide:
"Children are under a lot of pressure......Especially in a high-level academic and competitive environment. "They have anxiety and pressure, they want to be perfect, they want to be the best, they want to be the number one ......”
Perfectionism is widely present in elite college students, motivating them to strive for excellence.
But perfectionism is a double-edged sword, and excessive perfectionism leads to "compulsive behavior", constantly pushing yourself to do your best.
Once you find that things are derailed or you don't meet the standards, and you can't meet your parents' expectations, you don't deserve to live in the world.
"Perfectionism" is also highly associated with depression and suicide.
One of the surveys found:Of the 33 boys and young men who committed suicide, 70 percent were considered by their parents to be "very demanding of themselves."
Students from prestigious schools who have been carrying the huge expectations of their families and growing up with praise along the way, they have very high requirements for themselves, and subtly, they will go further and further on the road of pursuing perfection.
The psychological problems of international students are seriously neglectedA Yale University survey once found thatForty-five percent of Chinese students reported symptoms of depression, and 29 percent reported symptoms of anxiety, much higher than the overall 13 percent of U.S. college students.
For a long time, Chinese students have been a non-mainstream group in American society, so their mental health problems have always been ignored.
But in fact, in a foreign country, in an unfamiliar environment, the mental health problems of international students are more likely to appear.
First of all,Students have difficulty coping with sudden changes, causing uneasiness and anxiety, which in turn affects their lives and studies;
Secondly,Due to the different cultural backgrounds, it is difficult for international students to integrate into the mainstream group of American society, and it is easy to fall into cultural and interpersonal conflicts.
International students, especially Asian students, are relatively weak in their ability to adjust psychologically, despite their high academic performance.
Asian-American students are more introverted and better at hiding their emotions and trying to protect themselves by avoiding them.
Adolescent psychiatrist Susan Song has mentioned that they suffer from severe depression and suicidal thoughts, and they feel worthless. And these are directly related to their parents' precondition for loving them with academic success.
Asian parents' excessive focus on academic performance can lead to depression and anxiety among young people, and their indifference to their children's emotional well-being can affect their children's psychological problems.
There was once a private university in Chicago that asked American parents an interesting question: YouDo you want your child to be depressed at Yale or happy at the University of Arizona?
As a result, 75% of parents chose the formerThis answer is ridiculous.
For the sake of the aura of a famous school, you can actually let your child bear huge psychological pressure, but under the wave of chicken baby climbing vines, you may be the next parent to make such a choice!
The family of origin is the child's first petri dish, and the source of many of the child's psychological problems appears in the family.
As a parent,Instead of spending all your time on "chicken babies", it is better to help children develop independent, perfect and risk-resistant personalities first.
After all, the Ivy League school is not the end, and the children's growth and running have just begun.
In the face of your child's failures and frustrations, be more tolerant and understanding, and if you find that your child encounters any life, academic or psychological problems, you must take active action and seek professional help as soon as possible.
Don't let the situation get worse and worse, and don't let yourself regret it.
May a similar tragedy never happen again....