Hello everyone, I'm Mu Muxue!
I used to be a rotten good person who was kind to everyone, thinking that in this way I would be respected and rewarded by others.
However, after experiencing the cruelty of society, I have come to understand that not everyone will treat themselves the same way.
Some will take advantage of our kindness and soft-heartedness, some will be ungrateful, and some will betray our trust.
Master Hongyi once said:
"A soft-hearted person is an unblessed person, soft-hearted people seem to be open-minded, but in fact they are dull, seemingly kind, but in fact cowardly. ”After going through a lot of setbacks and tribulations, I gradually realized that only by thinking about my feelings and loving myself well can I win more respect and opportunities.
From a certain point of view, I appreciate the villains in film and television dramas.
Although they are bad in the eyes of others and are often intimidating, it is also because of this that they are not easily bullied.
They have many traits worth learning from, such as knowing how to live for themselves, having a strong sense of purpose, being emotionally stable, acting decisively, and not consuming themselves.
It is recommended that girls raise themselves as villains, love themselves, break the routine, start a different life, and maybe grow faster.
Maintain self-confidence and a strong sense of worthiness;
If you want to gain the respect and recognition of others, you must first respect and recognize yourself.
Dare to express your thoughts and needs, and don't doubt yourself because of the denial of others.
Believe that you deserve a better life and a better person, and don't be swayed by other people's evaluations.
Hegel once said:
"A man should respect himself and consider himself worthy of the noblest things. ”Develop the resilience in yourself, believe that you can accomplish what you want to do through hard work, and believe that you deserve a better life.
When we are confident enough, we will find that our lives can be different.
In the past, when I first started writing, I would occasionally receive some business promotions to protect my income;
At that time, I will not be confident at all, and I will have a sense of shame when talking to others, and I will always feel that I don't deserve that kind of benefit.
The whole cooperation was very stumbling to talk about, and it was lowered by the other party, and it was very low.
Later, after gradually deepening the self-writing, I gradually became confident, I am no longer ashamed to talk about money, but generous, but the cooperation is very smooth, and I have won a good **.
Therefore, I think that girls must be confident in everything they do, have a high sense of worthiness, and strive to make this sense of worthiness a reality, so that our lives will become smoother and smoother.
Love yourself, less PUA yourself;
Girls should learn to love themselves and not always be harsh or belittle themselves.
Don't deny yourself because of other people's evaluations, and don't be internally exhausted because of some of your own shortcomings.
Previously, my original article was plagiarized and published on Xiaohongshu, and my readers found out and told me.
I thought that it would not be easy for others to start an account, so I tried to communicate with her, as long as I deleted the plagiarized articles.
When the other party saw that I was easy to speak, she asked if she could not delete the article, because she plagiarized too many articles, and if she deleted them all, it would not be good for the account.
She said all kinds of good things, saying that she was still in college, and it was not easy to make a number. However, he just refused to delete it.
Because of this incident, I have been consuming myself internally for a long time, and I feel like a bad person who persecutes the weak.
Later, a friend said, what are you doing with so much nonsense with her, just complain directly, she is PUA you and take advantage of your kindness.
After listening to my friend's words, I suddenly realized and made a decisive complaint.
Sometimes people can't be too kind, learn to love themselves, avoid jumping into the trap of others using themselves, and less PUA themselves.
Emotionally stable, not overly empathetic;
Bi Shumin once said:
"Only with inner firmness can the scars left by the years be turned into a bookmark for growth. ”Emotional stability is a very important ability. An emotionally stable person is not swayed by the outside world, and they are better able to cope with challenges and stress.
Girls should learn to control their emotions and not let them affect their decision-making and actions.
At the same time, it is also very important not to overdo it. Empathy is the ability to understand and feel the emotions of others, but excessive empathy can get us caught up in unnecessary emotional entanglements.
We must learn to distinguish between our own emotions and the emotions of others, and maintain a certain distance and independence.
Clear goals, strong execution, unity of knowledge and action;
If a person has no goal, it is especially easy to fall into a state of confusion and get by every day.
We only need to observe the people around us a little, and we will find that those who are powerful usually have clear goals and strong execution.
Only a life with a goal can have a direction, so that you will not be confused.
We need to learn to set clear goals and have strong execution to achieve them.
At the same time, we must also achieve the unity of knowledge and action, and don't just dream and not act. Only by constantly acting can we make ourselves grow faster.
Dare to refuse, don't be a bad person;
Sometimes we do things against our will in order to pander to others or avoid conflict.
Not only does this make you feel uncomfortable, it's often thankless.
I remember when I first started working, a colleague in the company always liked to ask me to do some things for her to do her job.
Since I was a newcomer, it was difficult to refuse, so I agreed.
At first, I thought she wanted me to be more familiar with the job, but after I got my own job, she often asked me to give her her her job.
I want to reject her, but I'm afraid that she will be unhappy, so don't refuse, I am tired of working non-stop every day, and I am not tired.
Once, because she was in a hurry at work, she made a mistake, and the leader wanted to criticize her, but she threw the pot directly on me. Said that she had something to do, and that the work was for me to do.
In the end, the punishment was still my back, and the leader deducted my half-month performance.
Since that incident, I have started to reflect on myself. Maybe in the first place, I shouldn't have been a good person, I didn't know how to reject others.
So sometimes you really don't go against your will because you are embarrassed or afraid of offending others, you must dare to refuse the unreasonable demands of others, and don't be the bad person who always suffers.
Only by learning to say no can we better protect our own interests.
Unwavering in the pursuit of being strong.
Kazuo Inamori once said:
"Being strong is the last word. ”Girls should unswervingly pursue strength, not only on the outside, but also on the inside.
Reality is cruel, not strong, and soft endings are often ignored and manipulated.
Only when the heart is strong can we better face the challenges and difficulties in life, and can we go further and more steadily on the road of life.
We must continue to learn and grow and improve our abilities and qualities. At the same time, be humble and low-key, and not arrogant and ostentatious.
Girls, please raise yourself as a villain!
This is not for us to become bad, but for us to learn to love ourselves better, protect ourselves, and constantly improve ourselves.
Only in this way can you grow faster in life, better develop your potential, and face future challenges with more confidence.
In this world full of challenges and opportunities, only when you become stronger can you win more respect and opportunities.
I hope every girl can live her own wonderful life!
All of the above! 
It's not easy to code words, if you feel that the content inspires you, I hope you can spend 01 second to like, your affirmation will always be the power of my continuous output, thank you!
Author: Mu Muxue, a self-leading writer who focuses on personal growth and is working hard to be free, may we become a better version of ourselves through hard work and live the life we yearn for.