If you have a positive mindsetNot from the heart, but forced,This becomes the crux of the problem. 
Toxic transformation
In modern society, people are becoming more aware of mental health and its importance to our overall well-being, and we are more aware than ever of the importance of feeling good. Especially when it comes to social**, you need to focus on the positives.
Of course, a positive attitude is sincere, and that's a good thing. But if a positive mindset is not sincere, but forced, this becomes the crux of the matter.
When you start denying your true emotions, trying to convince yourself, clinging to an unreal state of mind, the positive emotions at this point can turn into toxic positive emotions.
We must remember that as human beings, we are destined to feel all sorts of emotions," says Gitanjali Trevorrow, "sadness and joy, disappointment and jealousy, joy and gratitude." None of these emotions should be eternal, they change – even if you are naturally optimistic, you can still feel sad and depressed, lonely and hopeless. ”
Even if you think of the word toxic positivity, it also suggests some overthinking. This can lead you to overkill. There is no point in wanting to eliminate these altogether. Like many things in life, it's all about balance.
Toxic positive words
Cheer up;Everything will be fine;
Don't worry, be happy!
Always see the bright side;
Everything has a cause!
It could have been worse.
At least ......
The danger of being passive
Gitanjali explains: "Toxic positive emotions come from an innocent misconception that some of our feelings are good, such as happiness and joy, while others are bad, such as sadness and unhappiness. ”
Obviously, we want more good feelings. But when we label our feelings in this way—good and bad, positive and negative—we risk chasing some feelings wrongly and desperately avoiding others.
When we know how our minds work, when we understand that these feelings come from only one place – our own mind, we know that there is no good or bad between these two feelings.
So, if you find yourself standing in front of a mirror saying to yourself over and over again, "Be positive, be positive," and cling to that, telling yourself to feel a single emotion, then we may end up suppressing and masking our true feelings. This repression can put additional stress on the body, which can eventually lead to depression, anxiety, and even physical illness.
Over time, once we experience negativity, it's natural to feel negative or defeated, which not only makes us feel guilty, but we end up denying ourselves what we really experience—that is, feeling joy, sadness, and everything in between.
Gitanjali said, "Every guru quickly notices one thing – how much time they spend getting caught up in what we call whining, moaning and wailing. Of course, no one wants to be stuck in complaining, so we go to the other extreme, only showing people our happy selves and behaving in a certain way in front of others. It's not real, and ironically, it doesn't feel good in the end. ”
It robs us of a deeper connection with those around us. When people ask us, "Are you okay?", we don't get a real answer, and this positivity is really superficial. ”
We focus too much on positive emotions, fear other negative emotions, and get caught up in them. But, as human beings, we need to know how our minds work. We want to understand that 100% of our feelings come from 100% of our minds. As Gitanjali said, "I wish someone had told me decades ago that a feeling can only last until the end of the thought." ”
Sadness, anger, and all other negative emotions need to be experienced. It is only when we accept ourselves and all our emotions that we can have a truly healthy mind.
It is possible not to be blindly optimistic in the way
So, if we don't overdo it in the pursuit of "positivity", then what should we "become"?
Stay present
Don't focus on what happened in the past and what has happened, as this can lead to depression. Similarly, if you turn your attention to the future, it's easy to get caught up in worry or anxiety. By living in the present moment, we can alleviate many of these feelings.
Be courageous
Accept the fact that we can't even ** the next idea, let alone the future!Be brave enough to live with discomfort, and instead of seeking refuge in positive emotions, be brave enough to look for possibilities.
Be curious.
Keep your emotions true and not try to convince yourself that you feel something else and see how long they can last and what they can develop. Remember, they don't last forever.
Self-care. While many of us show care for others, we also need to extend that kindness to ourselves. Allow yourself to feel your emotions authentically and don't feel guilty about them.
Help others
Imagine this – someone tells you they're going through a tough time. Maybe they've left their job, broken up with their partner, or had to move out of their dream house.
They pour out their hearts to you, and what about your response?
People tend to say: try to be positive!
Gitanjali explains: "People are obviously doing it with good intentions, trying to make that person feel better or find a solution, but you have to think from the listener's point of view. They don't feel fulfilled or feel better because of the experience. ......You're actually avoiding and ignoring their feelings. As a result, the other person may feel like they can't be their true selves or can't express their thoughts unless it's about something positive. They will feel compelled to put on a brave face and suppress their true experiences and emotions, which is tiring. ”
For children, we do the sameThere should be no attempt to deny or distract them from negative emotions。We've all seen cases where grandparents turn on the TV or hand them a bar of chocolate to distract their parents from leaving, but Gitanjali doesn't think it's good for them.
"For parents, trying to distract themselves is a perfectly reasonable response, which means that they will learn to look outward in order to feel better about themselves in the future, rather than dealing with their emotions alone," Gitanjali said. ”
A survey in Science found that:
53% experience it on a weekly basis
One to three toxic positive emotions.
Experience the benefits of bad things
Positive emotions can provide solutions and divert our attention, but the important thing is that the negative emotions of sadness are all around us, and it is important to acknowledge what we have experienced and felt. By acknowledging your sadness, crying of sadness, and expressing your emotions. Maybe it won't take long for the sadness to go away with the wind and really cheer us up.
Accepting bad emotions shows the importance of expressing one's thoughts and feelings, as well as allowing others to do so. We are born with the ability to recover from grief and be able to return us to a state of clarity and calm, however, to do this, we need to recognize our feelings in order to be able to move on.
We all feel scared when someone is sad – afraid of making them feel worse, afraid of being negative, afraid of saying the wrong thing. But, usually, it's enough to be there for them, not to try to solve their problems or make them happy again.
Once we accept ourselves and all our emotions, we can have truly strong mental health. Many people use "positive" and other similar expressions as affirmations, saying something to themselves every day to help them reprogram their minds to capture empowering beliefs, habits, and thought patterns.
However, we also want to affirm negative emotions, which can be a very useful tool for many people if used correctly.
Copyright Notice: Part of the content, **article** on the Internet, the copyright belongs to the original author, only for sharing, if the shared content infringes your copyright or the mark** is not the first original, please send a private message, we will review and delete it in time