Happy New Year, I'm Ah Hui.
It is often said that in the end, all that is left of marriage is dullness.
However, the average life expectancy of modern people is getting longer and longer, and even if you get married at the age of 30, you have to spend 50 years together.
If in this long time, there is only plain companionship, how can it not be a kind of torment.
So how to make a man fall in love with you again and again in a long married life and regain the passion of the original love?
It's very simple, just grasp the four words.
Self-improvement
There is a term in psychology called the "molting effect".
So what exactly is the "molting effect"?
In nature, some animals will molt in the process of growth, such as snakes, the whole molting process is very painful, but only after experiencing this process will the body grow.
The "molting effect" is a concept proposed by psychology based on this phenomenon, which refers to the fact that people will not be satisfied with the status quo, but choose to jump out of their comfort zone and become a better version of themselves through metamorphosis again and again. Chen Guo, a professor at Fudan University, once said:
"Long-term love is to fall in love with the same person over and over again. ”The reason why we fall in love with someone is that we are attracted to a certain trait in him, and we become interested in it, and then develop into a relationship.
And this trait is the value of the person, and it is also the foundation on which the relationship is built, and if she does not provide value, then the relationship may also break.
The same goes for marriage.
In marriage, if a woman covets temporary beauty and gives up her own growth, the relationship may not last long. Women who can use the "molting effect" will not stop learning and continue to improve their own value, not only retaining love, but also making men love themselves more and more.
ContentmentMy colleague Ming Chen is a married man who has been married for 3 years.
In the past six months, he has always been the latest one in the company, and he just doesn't go home after the work is done.
Later, I heard that it was because I didn't want to go home and face my wife's endless complaints.
His wife always said that his salary was low, and his best friend's husband had a monthly income, saying that he didn't understand romance, and that his husband had given her any gifts, etc.
It's been a long time, and tomorrow morning I don't want to go home more and more.
Human desires are infinite, and if you allow yourself to be coerced by desires, you will become slaves to desires.
The unwillingness and resentment that we can't ask for will make us more and more unhappy, and then all the negative emotions will be on the other half, how can such a marriage be happy?
In the long run, no amount of love will be worn out, how can it be possible to fall in love with you again and again?
In fact, true wealth does not lie in the amount of wealth, but in spiritual abundance.
Think about the umbrella he sent you in the rain, think about the soup he made for you with his own hands, and think about the ** he didn't forget to report to you when he was entertaining, isn't it more distracting than a brand-name bag?
Contentment and happiness will not only make you feel comfortable, but your thoughtfulness will also make men love you even more.
In married life, a woman's continuous self-improvement and contentment will make men feel very comfortable with you, and it will also make men fall in love with you again and again.
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I'm Ah Hui, focusing on emotion, personal growth, and life insights.
Looking forward to moving forward with you all the way!