First of all, don't put too much emphasis on marriage. Most of this generation grew up in families with many children, and they all had a difficult upbringing. Because of the narrow vision, lack of knowledge, and a superficial understanding of love. After getting married, you can only live a simple life in order to make a living, not to mention spending money on the spiritual level. When we reach middle age, although our material life is better, we are also old. At this stage, you need to reduce the burden of marriage and give each other some reasonable space, so that you can live comfortably, otherwise it will be difficult. I used to have a colleague who got married in very difficult conditions, and his in-laws' family was very poor, and the two of them even got married in a simple bachelor dormitory.
In order to save money, they spent all the money on their husbands, and a few years later, the husband was promoted, the family had money, and the unit was returned to the building. However, as her husband's status rises, he cheats. She felt very unfair, aggrieved, and angry, and as a result, she had a nervous breakdown and physical problems. Now she is not cured. Therefore, for women after the age of fifty, they should dilute the pursuit of marriage and pay more attention to themselves, so that they can live a happy and healthy old age.
Secondly, it is necessary to have a correct understanding of the child's return. We can do anything for the sake of our children, but try not to expect anything in return. Otherwise, it will be emotionally unstable and not good for your health.
I know a beautiful woman who saved money for her son's wedding and spent her life savings on it. However, after his son got married, he was a little partial to his mother-in-law, and always bought large bags of gifts for his mother-in-law's family, but he was very stingy with her. This made her feel unfair and began to sulk, feeling that she had raised this child for nothing.
She put all the blame on her daughter-in-law, and since then she has lost a good face with her daughter-in-law. The family has also become less harmonious, and the children are afraid to go home. Her health also began to deteriorate.
In fact, loving children is not a quid pro quo, but a selfless giving. If this is misunderstood, it will ruin the family.
In addition, filial piety to parents should be treated in moderation. Although filial piety is a virtue, excessive is masochism. As Confucius said, filial piety should not be a sign of stupidity.
Take one of my husband's classmates, she has six sisters, and she is the eldest, so she has the responsibility of taking care of her mother. However, my mother was paralyzed and had cerebral dementia, crying and fussing all night, and she took care of her too hard, resulting in lack of sleep and deterioration of her health. In the end, when he turned over his mother, he died of a sudden cerebral hemorrhage.
It's a sad story of a white-haired man sending a black-haired man. It doesn't matter how many sisters you have, the important thing is that each person does his best to do his or her own responsibility, and does not exchange his life for filial piety, otherwise he will deviate from the original intention of filial piety. What do you think?