Zeng Guofan once said: "When interacting with others, we should remember the advantages of others, discover the advantages of others, and understand the difficulties of others." The hardest part of this sentence is to discover the good in others. This makes you happy as well as others. There is a woman who is dissatisfied with her colleague's behavior of taking advantage of small advantages at work, and her heart is full of grievances; When she came home from work, there were often arguments because of her husband's laziness and non-housework. Feeling unfortunate in her career and family, she confided in an elder. After listening to this, the elder asked her, "Are your colleagues and husbands doing well?" After deep thought, she replied, "Yes, my colleagues are very helpful and always helpful. My husband, although lazy, was very good to me and my children. The elder smiled and said, "That's right." Only by looking at the good points of others can we get along with them with peace of mind. The lady felt that it made sense, and when she returned home, she began to change her mindset and look more at the good in others. As a result, she became harmonious with her colleagues and husband. This reminds me of the story of Yang Jiang and Qian Zhongshu. Qian Zhongshu is a talented person with a lot of knowledge, but in life he is like an innocent child who often makes mistakes. During Yang Jiang's childbirth and hospitalization, Qian Zhongshu went to the hospital to see her every day, and every time he brought something he did wrong: ""Gathering spirits" and "collecting dirt" in interpersonal relationships is an attitude choice. When facing others, we can choose to focus on each other's strengths, actively look for empathy and common ground, and establish harmonious interactions. On the contrary, if we pay too much attention to the shortcomings of others and find fault with each other's shortcomings, it is a kind of "dirty" mentality, which is easy to destroy interpersonal relationships and fall into a negative cycle.
By looking at the examples of Yang Jiang and Qian Zhongshu, we can draw an important lesson: in intimate relationships, tolerance and understanding are the bonds that maintain affection. Yang Jiang treated Qian Zhongshu's mistakes with an open-minded attitude, which not only resolved the contradictions, but also deepened the relationship between the two. She chose to "gather spirits", focusing on Qian Zhongshu's cuteness, rather than "collecting dirt", and overemphasizing his shortcomings. This positive attitude laid a solid foundation for their marriage.
Returning to the lady mentioned earlier, by changing her opinion, she managed to come out of the state of "dirty". She began to take the initiative to find the strengths of her colleagues and husband, and treated each other's shortcomings with a tolerant heart. This shift has not only made her happier personally, but has also had a positive impact on those around her.
In life, we will encounter all kinds of people and things, and in the face of these, choosing to "gather spirits" instead of "collecting dirt" may allow us to deal with them more calmly. In interpersonal relationships, understanding and being understood, and tolerance and being tolerated go hand in hand. As a wise man once said, "To look at the faults of others is to look at one's own future." ”
Perhaps, in our lives, we can also find more examples of this, those who know how to "gather spirits", face the shortcomings of others with a tolerant attitude, and create warm and beautiful interpersonal relationships. This may be the true meaning of interpersonal communication - to be kind to others and feel the beauty of life.
Let us let go of our demands on others and learn to find light and beauty in them. Whether it's at home, at work, or in social situations, the attitude of "gathering spirits" has become the keynote of our interactions with others. With a tolerant and understanding attitude, we can create more warm and harmonious interpersonal relationships and make our lives more colorful.
I would like to ask readers, in your relationships, do you prefer to "gather spirits" or "collect dirt"? How do you approach your relationships with others to make them more harmonious? We look forward to hearing from you about your valuable insights and experiences.
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