Tomorrow is my mother-in-law's 65th birthday and I plan to go out in the afternoon to order a birthday cake. Walking out of the gate of the community, I was pleasantly surprised to find that less than 20 meters from the community, a cake shop had actually opened. I used to think that the cake shop would not be open because the owner, Sister Cao, is from Zhenba County, southern Shaanxi, and she usually returns to her hometown during the Chinese New Year.
I decided to go into the store to have a look, and Sister Cao was answering ** at the time, her tone seemed a little anxious, and she was complaining about something. After hanging up, she still couldn't hide her upset expression.
Since I knew Sister Cao very well, I asked her about her situation. She told me that she had just returned from her hometown for the Chinese New Year, and now she was invited to give gifts and hold a banquet.
Here's my personal experience:
My name is Cao Jinxiu, I am a post-80s generation living in a village in the Qinba Mountains. I only finished high school and got married when I was 20 years old.
When I was 24 years old, my husband and I moved to the provincial capital, where he worked in sales and couriers, while I worked as a waitress in a hotel. After a few years of hard work, we saved a sum of money.
In 2016, I went out to learn baking techniques, and then opened a cake shop in a neighborhood near Chaoyangmen, specializing in making and selling all kinds of pastries.
My store business is not bad, I operate in good faith for the purpose, adhere to the most reasonable, mainly rely on the return rate of old customers. Over time, I have amassed a large number of loyal regular customers.
On the eve of the Chinese New Year, I took my children back to my hometown for the New Year. As soon as we got home, we were busy giving gifts, and in just three days, I gave six gifts, four of which were for people in the village and two for the new daughter-in-law of a relative.
Five years ago, it was enough to give 200 yuan as a gift, but now it starts with at least 300 yuan. As for relatives, each household has to send at least 500 yuan, and when my uncle's son got married, I gave 1,000 yuan as a gift. In three days, we gave out nearly 3,000 yuan.
On the second day of the Lunar New Year, it was the birthday of the third grandfather of my family, and they had a treat, and we gave another 500 yuan. When I returned to my hometown, I gave 2,000 yuan to my in-laws and parents. Combined with some expenses during the Chinese New Year, we almost ran out of cash to take home.
On the sixth day of the Lunar New Year, taking advantage of the free expressway, our family left our hometown by car. As a result, today I received a WeChat message from my neighbor, telling me that there is an old man in the village who is going to celebrate his 70th birthday, and it is a large-scale celebration, and the three sons of the old man are all going around to inform relatives, friends and people in the village. Since they don't have my **, let the neighbors notify me.
It's so annoying! Knowing that we are not at home all the year round, doing business in other places, and the old man's birthday is not a big event, he still wants to inform us. Clear-eyed people know at a glance that this is just to solicit customers, if we are at home, we will definitely go, and now we know that we are not there, and we have to embarrass people, looking for someone to bring news, nothing more than to let us give gifts.
And that family has too many housework, there are many old people, many children, and big and small things have to be done, to be honest, I really don't want to go, but if I don't go to give gifts, I will offend people. In addition, we also have elderly people in our family, and we may need the help of the village people in the future.
This is the case in rural areas, where some people hold banquets ten or eight times a year, and as long as you don't go to give a gift once, they will hold a grudge. The two of us are not in our hometown all the year round, but every year there are all kinds of red and white things in our hometown, such as the school banquet, engagement wine, and confinement wine, all of which have to go, and if we don't go, we have to give gifts. If you do the math, you have to give at least 15,000 gifts every year.
If our family doesn't hold a banquet for a few years, it will be a big loss. I really don't like this kind of human love field, it's too troublesome. Guanzhong is much better, the favor is weak, the general relationship is enough to send 200 yuan, and the closer ones are a little more. Such mutual benefits are relatively easy.
Most of the hard-earned money this year was spent on personal contacts, which was a real headache. It is said on the Internet that the people in Hunan and Sichuan are heavy, and I don't think it is easy for us here in southern Shaanxi, maybe it is even heavier than those places.
What are the criteria for gifting elsewhere?
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