2024 Chinese New Year outlook
In fact, this ability is not as difficult as the legend, as long as you look at his deeds, observe his words, you can get a lot of information, and people's words and deeds are linked to his fortune, if there is anything wrong, we must pay attention to it, which will affect your blessings.
Guiguzi has always been a mysterious person in history. Not only was he proficient in military strategy, but he was also a knowledgeable professional advisor who helped the kings and used what he learned to assist them in unifying the world.
Guiguzi: The amazing "law of the circle of friends": no matter how good the relationship is, don't ignore these 4 unspoken rules.
There is a "circle law" in sociology, also known as the "150 law".
The number of people whose intelligence allows humans to have a stable social circle is 148, rounded up to about 150.
In other words, the upper limit of a person's circle of friends at a certain stage is no more than 100 people.
When people reach middle age, they feel more and more that the older they are, the smaller their circle of friends becomes.
It is inevitable that some friends will be a pity to delete them, it is useless to keep them, they dare not abandon them, and they are the most tired to get along.
For this reason, you might as well do a proper subtraction for the circle of friends.
How to break up the circle of friends, these 4 unspoken rules cannot be ignored.
The level of the circle of friends is different: it is not equal, and it is not attached
The ancients said that things gather by like, and people are divided by groups.
Between people, between circles, sometimes it is so clear.
Emma in Flaubert's famous book Madame Bovary has a yearning for high society after attending a lavish ball hosted by the Marquis with her husband.
So she borrowed 8,000 francs of jewelry from a merchant on credit, pretending to be a celebrity, intending to get a ticket to the nobility.
However, the Viscount, who had invited her to dance with her at the ball, was only on a whim;
Rodolf, the owner of the manor who had an affair with her out of wedlock, only coveted her beauty.
From beginning to end, no matter how much Emma tried to cover it up, she couldn't whitewash the fact that she was just a mediocre woman, how could she be really seen by the upper class?
* In the end, Emma was called on by a merchant who owed jewelry on credit, and several mistresses asked for help one after another, but they were all rejected.
Disheartened, he committed suicide in despair.
Throughout the ages, circles have been the boundaries of hierarchy.
If you want to fit into a circle, you can only improve your self-worth and energy.
When you have strength and influence, you can get the stepping stone.
Otherwise, you can only return lost.
Panoramic vision.
Gu Jia in "Thirty Only", the economic foundation is acceptable, but it is not enough to squeeze into the circle of rich wives.
She tried her best to please them, thinking that in this way, the rich women would become her connections.
In the end, he was deceived by their partnership and lost millions.
Any circle pays attention to identity and value, you are not weighty, even if you wander around all kinds of dinners, you don't have the strength to exchange, communicate, and compete with them, no matter how hard you try to squeeze, you are an outsider.
On the contrary, in the long-term useless socialization, it will become more and more difficult to see their own positioning.
Sometimes the circle of friends is intimate: not close enough, not strong integration
Some people tend to fall into such self-blame, and people who claim to be emotional, and the "constant contact" that they say is good gradually becomes "no contact".
Ms. M and her college classmates have maintained the frequency of weekly gatherings for many years, and this kindness has made many people envious.
Last year, my classmates went to another city for work reasons.
Ms. M reluctantly found that the tacit understanding they had together in the past week had gradually become a burden.
Running around to gather in two cities is too hard and unrealistic;
Occasionally, *** often falls into silence and embarrassment, and now the circles and experiences we live in are different, and it is difficult to have a common topic.
This kind of intimacy that is strong on the surface only lasted for half a year, and then it was broken.
But when Ms. M saw that her classmate's recent circle of friends had posted a new weekend friend, her heart couldn't help but sting.
In fact, no matter how good the relationship is, it will fade over time.
Panoramic vision.
was originally a friendship that had nothing to say, but later went their separate ways, even if they missed it occasionally, they could no longer find a reason to get together;
The brothers and sisters who grew up together later became separate families and could no longer be separated.
In this life, it is the norm to usher in the send-off.
Perhaps, this is the process that life must go through.
Because each person has a different life trajectory, they have to sail to different distances; It is also because of distance and loss that people cherish the current encounter more.
After all, once someone says goodbye, it may be the last time they will see each other in this life.
Circle of friends circulation: negative energy, cut away
There was a topic on the Internet: When did you make up your mind to end a relationship?
A highly praised answer is:
When the energy brought to me by this relationship was much lower than the consumption of me.
Not long ago, I was overwhelmed by the mental burden and blocked the WeChat of my former colleague Sister Zhao.
In the past six months, Sister Zhao often nagged me in the middle of the night that her husband would not return home at night, or would get drunk on the sofa when he came home;
Even during work hours, she has no scruples about complaining to me about family trivialities.
Each time it is 60 seconds of WeChat voice, or more than 30 minutes**.
After a period of time, my only words of persuasion were not enough to calm Sister Zhao's resentment, not to mention, I was also deeply affected, fell into the quagmire of negative energy, got angry at every turn, and didn't like anything.
There were frequent conflicts with his family, and he almost lost an old customer who had been maintained for a long time because he couldn't control his emotions.
Zeng Guo Fan's Family Letter" said:
Whoever complains too much will be silenced afterwards. If you complain about the sky for no reason, the sky will not allow it, and if you don't complain about it for no reason, then people will not accept it, and the reason for induction is also. “
It means that those who complain too much will have a lot of blockages in their lives.
Panoramic vision.
complaining about God for no reason, God will not agree; For no reason, people will not be convinced.
This is the inner cycle of "feeling" and "response".
Getting along with people who are full of "negativity" is often a disaster. If you don't stay away in time, you will fall into the abyss of emotions together.
This also confirms the "law of emotional transfer" in psychology, where the emotions of a person and those around him will affect each other.
If you associate with people who are too heavy with negative energy, if you don't stay away in time, it will be too late to regret.
Circle of friends hides cause and effect: be cautious about making friends and make good friends
Someone once did a survey that the final appearance of each person is the sum of the looks of at least five people around him, and they will imperceptibly impregnate your behavior.
In short, a person's future is often intrinsically linked to the circle of friends they are in.
Flying with the birds, the vast sky is as far as the eye can see;
Fly low with the bird, and the heart is only low clouds and shallow fog;
In the company of flies and insects, it is inevitable that the place where you go will be filthy and messy.
If you are not careful in making friends, you will bury the root of the trouble. Only by choosing the truth and the good people and the true gentlemen can we help life.
Metropolis Chen Daoming doesn't like to socialize, but he has a decades-long friendship with Ge You, a national first-class actor.
He and Ge You have very different personalities, but they are both drama addicts, and they often ponder dramas together.
Over the years, one of the two won the Golden Eagle Award on the front foot, and the other won the Academy Award on the back foot.
Even though Chen Daoming has a lot of works of gods, he doesn't dare to slack off for a day in the play.
Panoramic vision.
When filming "The First Half of My Life", without his role, Chen Daoming would stand by and watch inch by inch, and ask Ma Yili for advice:
"Our performances at that time bear traces of that era, and I came to see how you people of your age acted, and I came to learn. ”The two are also teachers and friends along the way.
As Lincoln put it:"In a sense, what kind of friends you choose, what kind of life you choose. ”
A high-quality friend is often like a mirror, which can keep you from being coerced by the flow of desires, and constantly introspect and improve.
If you have a deep friendship with a self-disciplined person, you will most likely not be free and loose; Walking with the elite, you rarely do nothing.
The ancients said: "Choosing friends is the first thing in life." ”
The success or failure of a life is all related to the merit of friends, and you must not be careless.
When you are young, you are most likely to be kidnapped by the so-called human sophistication.
When people reach middle age, they slowly understand that there are only two or three confidants and friends, and it is useless to overflow.
Unequal socialization, you might as well abandon it; Friends who don't contact them, give up the pain; The relationship between negative energy is decisively broken.
People are separated from each other, and we can't easily trust some people.
In this world, except for your parents, no one really wants you to live better than him, including your friends and lovers.
Although, they will also sincerely wish you well, but they can't accept that you are better than them, otherwise they will feel psychologically unbalanced.
People's hearts are not enough to swallow elephants, friends and lovers are still like this, let alone those villains?
Society is a big dye vat, in which there are all kinds of people, and we have to be careful.
Speaking of which, I have to say a cruel fact, the relationship between people is not pure, but supported by interests, once there is a conflict of interest between you, it is inevitable to fight openly and secretly.
Many people look easy to get along with on the surface, but they are very dark inside, and there are countless sharp blades hidden behind their kind smiles, ready to attack.
They have long been disgusted with you, but they have to maintain a superficial friend relationship with you because of the layers of relationships.
Be kind to you when you are needed. When you are in trouble, you just blindly raise a smile without warmth, and try your best to escape it.
Such a person is very deep, if you really fall into his trap and believe in his pretenses, one day you will be pushed into the bottomless abyss by him, and you will not be able to turn over.
If you accidentally offend him, he will keep it in his heart, secretly make you a stumbling block, and do everything possible to hinder you from success.
As the saying goes, misfortune comes from the mouth, too many words will be lost, and people's hearts are unpredictable, we must learn to be cautious in words and deeds. You can't treat those villains casually like you do with your family, and you have to keep your distance.
As long as you are still in a complex social environment, you must not relax and always be vigilant. They are all your competitors, so naturally they don't want you to be too close to them.
People's hearts are separated from the belly, maybe some of your small habits that you don't care about have other meanings in their eyes, but they are only unhappy in their hearts, and they are not shocked on the surface.
In the eyes of a thousand people, there are a thousand Hamlets. Everyone is different, has different personalities and hobbies, and has different understandings of the same words and actions.
Once you do something to them that they are not happy with, you are likely to make enemies for yourself.
Rather than this, it is better to keep a distance from them, grasp the measure, only do what is within the bounds, and do not cause extraneous branches.
A colleague can only be a colleague, and you should not try to sublimate into another relationship, otherwise it is very likely that you will ask for hardship.
Be clear that your relationship is not very close in the first place, and there may even be a conflict of interest at any time.
You can't read other people's thoughts, you can only control yourself as much as possible, not to provoke right and wrong, and not to offend others as much as possible. At the same time, we should not share our joys and sorrows with them.
Because, from the perspective of competition in the workplace, when you convey negative emotions to them, it will only make them feel disgusted and unhappy.
Although, on the surface, it may not be revealed, but in the heart you will secretly complain, and you may even use your sad things as a talking point to others.
Especially those who like to talk nonsense, they will add fuel to your trivial little things and spread them throughout the company, leaving a bad impression on those who don't know you.
If you want to share the happiness with them, they will see it as a kind of show-off.
But your relationship is too ordinary, and you don't know what kind of life they are living and whether they are in a difficult time.
If you speak out about your good deeds, you may rub salt in their wounds and make them hold a grudge against you.
Selfishness and jealousy are human nature, and there is no real empathy in this world, only sympathy and hatred after contrast.
Anyway, it doesn't work horizontally or vertically, so it's better to just hide everything in your heart, try to digest it yourself, and keep silent about them.
Life inevitably has ups and downs, and triumph and frustration will always alternate, and no one has a smooth ride.
Only children write joy and sorrow on their faces, and adults must learn to deal with their emotions on their own.
The Book of Rites says:Whoever achieves great things must be cautious in the end, and those who achieve great things must be cautious throughout.
The most terrible thing in this world has always been the human heart. Those who get along with you day and night may also harm you.
Some people's malice is unwarranted to you, but in their eyes, they are justified and even ignore your explanations.
Since we can't change them, we can only try to control ourselves, restrain ourselves, and be cautious in our words and actions.
Life is like a lake approaching spring, with a thin layer of ice, and we walk on it, with every step of the way, and if we are not careful, we will fall.
Chinese culture is broad and profound, and it thoroughly understands all the things in life. Sometimes when you can't figure it out or understand it, look at the words of the ancients and become enlightened in an instant. It turns out that those difficult questions have long been answered by the ancients for thousands of years.
The words of the ancestors have been passed down for thousands of years, and the words are not rough, but now it seems to be very reasonable, I don't know what you think of the words of the ancestors?
To learn the wisdom of these sayings, in fact, the best way is to read books, the book "Guiguzi" records a lot of folk customs and stories, if you can seriously understand the truth of the book to behave in the world, then your life will go more smoothly.
In this complex social system, we have to cultivate our ability to behave in the world, Guiguzi teaches us to be strict with ourselves, self-cultivation, leniency to others, and to repay the society is to do good!
Now there are many people who learn Guiguzi, because Guiguzi's strategy is different from Zhuge Liang, his strategy can be applied to the study and life of ordinary people, and life will go to the next level if you learn it!
After reading "Guiguzi", I found that there are many ways to live in the world, and there are many techniques and strategies for accumulating good luck. The old gentleman of Guigu has already made it clear!
If you haven't made a fortune by the age of forty, then you should read more "Guiguzi".
In fact, it's not just middle-aged people. If young people read this book earlier, they will be more likely to learn the truth about society, to understand the complexities of people's hearts, and they will be more likely to succeed. Reading more "Guiguzi", in addition to learning more about some unspoken rules of society, can also make things easier.
Now there are many entrepreneurs who study Guiguzi, because Guiguzi's strategy is different from Zhuge Liang, Zhuge Liang talks about governing the country, while Mr. Guiguzi talks about the wisdom of the people, which is more suitable for us to learn.
If it can be passed down and will be passed down forever, then there must be something worth learning about the philosophy of Guiguzi. According to the records of his apprentice's descendants, his strategies are collected in the book "Guiguzi", which are all wisdom that can be used in our daily life.
It is worth mentioning that "Guiguzi" is inclusive of all rivers, gathering the ideological essence of the Zongheng family, the military family, the Taoist, the immortal family, etc., not only for each article has an analysis and guide, and attached the representative cases of ancient and modern China and foreign countries, covering management, shopping malls, workplaces, life and other fields, with wonderful stories to show the wisdom and strategy of Guiguzi.
In fact, after watching "Guiguzi", many people will be surprised to find that the usual communication skills and "unspoken rules" mentioned by Mr. "Guiguzi" thousands of years ago have been very clear. If you reach middle age and are still confused and worried about your livelihood, then Guiguzi is really a book you must read.
This set of books "Guiguzi" has a total of 5 volumes, each of which is a wisdom book that is of great help to the workplace and life, and it can be said that as long as you take out one of them, it will be a book that will benefit you for a lifetime.
After reading "Guiguzi", I realized that if you meet a pig, don't talk about ideals with him, because it only knows feed. After reading "The Parchment Scroll", I realized that when the heart is big, the matter is small. When the heart is relieved, the annoyance is gone. After reading "Wolf Road", I realized that people who are not used to seeing it, don't care, smiling is the best counterattack. After reading "Murphy's Law", I realized that nothing is as simple as it seems, and the more you are afraid of something, the more something will happen. After reading "The Weakness of Human Nature", I realized that there are two things in the world that cannot be looked at directly, one is the sun and the other is the human heart.
A set of books can benefit you for a lifetime and improve your wisdom. Why not?