Children are angels and devils! Are children the glue of marriage or a mirror?
Do you think having children makes marriage better or worse?
It seems that many families have problems with parenting, housework, financial burdens, physical and psychological interactions, and intimacy after giving birth. Therefore, in ordinary marriages, is the existence of children the adhesive of marriage or a mirror?
It can be found that people who answer "there is no absolute relationship between the success or failure of marriage and having children" are usually still in the state of marriage, that is to say, for partners who have enough wisdom to manage their marriage, whether they have children or not does not affect the survival of the marriage.
Many people believe that the success or failure of a marriage depends on whether we meet a god teammate or a pig teammate, and if the marriage partner is not suitable, the condition of the child will naturally detonate the existing problems between the couple.
Just like many divorced people will say to unmarried people: "Don't get married if you know it early, single is still the happiest, it's better not to get married if it's okay" is the same reason. I often hear people say, "If it weren't for the children, I would have been divorced." Others will say, "It's okay to get married, but it's better not to have children." Others said, "I'd rather find someone to have children with me than tie me up with marriage for the rest of my life." "There are thousands of life issues, and everyone encounters different situations, and personal experience cannot be applied to others.
I don't think there is an absolute relationship between the success or failure of a marriage and having children, but "children" are definitely a big variable in marriage.
Because having a child will extend to various issues, such as financial management, time management, educational philosophy, adjustment of living space and self-space, the influence of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law or other family members on the growth of children, etc., there are conflicts in life that already exist in marriage, because the addition of new members may require more communication and mutual adaptation.
When you don't want to have children for personal preference, someone will tell you that a family is complete only if you have children. When you say that you don't have money and don't want to have children, there will be a birth brigade to tell you that you don't have to worry about children with money! When you want to divorce because of your partner's affair or family responsibilities, someone will tell you that it is pitiful to think that the child does not have a complete family, and bear with it!
I don't think you need to meet the expectations of "others" all the time in life, let alone live in other people's mouths, not to mention that some "others" will not bear any part of your life at all.
The consensus of the husband and wife is the most important, the child is an angel and a devil, every child has a cute part, and there is also a headache part that he is not controlled. As a parent, it is impossible to just have fun with angelic children and not share the devilish torment.
February**Dynamic Incentive Plan Children may be the glue of marriage, or they may be the mirror of marriage; It could be the time machine of your life, or it could be the time-lapse of your life; It could be your fortune time thief, or it could be the accelerator of your career. The variables in this marriage depend on how the couple faces them.
The most important thing is that when the relationship between husband and wife has problems, don't think that having a child can get the chance of redemption and saving the marriage, most of the results are worse and backfire!