Hello everyone:
Welcome to the 100% funny collection to make you (high) laugh all day!
On the way home to send my girlfriend, I saw a wedding car parked at the intersection with a lot of lollipops on it.
My girlfriend looked at me, then at the BMW, and said to me, "I want to eat a lollipop." ”
I saw that there was no one around, so I leaned over and picked a lollipop.
My girlfriend actually said that she didn't have enough, and she wanted a few.
I went over to pick it again, this time thinking of taking a few more, lest she say it wasn't enough. But when I just picked the first one, the window slowly opened, and a brother in the car poked out half of his head and stared at the lollipop in my hand and said, "Dude, don't pick it again, leave me a little more, I have to pick up the kiss tomorrow!" ”
It embarrassed me at the time, and I really wanted to find a crack in the ground to get into
I remember once taking a bus, a young mother with a baby came up on the way, and she was ready to politely give up her seat, and I thought to myself how to call each other, call them "Auntie", they look quite young; Let's call it "sister", it doesn't feel good.
As she stood in front of me, I said, "me, son!" ”
Before the words fell, my friends behind me burst into laughter!
My mother, my face turned red at that time! 」
If even the aunt at the noodle shop won't call you a handsome guy, then the matter is a bit serious.
You don't have to accumulate equipment to be the top card in Qinglou, but you have to save money early to redeem yourself.
One day, when I went downstairs to walk the dog after dinner, a little girl ran up to the dog and asked me, "Auntie, can I pet the puppy?" ”
I was only 18 years old, and she actually called me aunt, and I said seriously: "Call sister!" ”
Then the little girl said, "Auntie, can I touch my sister?" ”
Oops, my mother, I'm laughing to death! 」
I was so amused by this little girl show that I was almost speechless! 」
A few years ago, there were more people who stole batteries, so I asked my colleague to lock the battery, hey, he didn't listen, but after work, he screamed, I looked, the battery was gone, I laughed: "If you don't listen to me, you deserve it!" “
I said triumphantly, "Let's go, I'll take you back today." "He just scrambled after my ass.
But I searched for a long time and didn't find my battery car, obviously parked here, why can't I find it all of a sudden?
After looking for an afternoon, I went to the security department to monitor and monitor, only to find that the group of grandsons directly pulled my battery car away from the van!
Woo, at that time, my colleague laughed next to him and couldn't stand up straight, and said: "Someone's battery car doesn't have it, at least I still have a car!" ”
What a shame at the time!
After the single mode has been on for too long, every time you call** is: Sorry, the person you are calling is married.
The greatest tragedy of life is when you unknowingly wipe your nose under the table and find that there is already a ...... there
I remember when I was a child, on the eighth day of the first lunar month, a few friends discussed preparing to go to the Internet café to play games, I had no money at the time, and secretly took a bottle of wine when my parents were not there to go to a distant relative's house to pay New Year's greetings.
At that time, my relatives gave me 100 yuan to press the New Year's money, I gave it up according to the custom, just a moment, the relatives actually took it back, and said that the child was really sensible, I left with a bitter face, and when I returned to the intersection to tell my friends, he was speechless!
The first time I went to the driving school, the instructor said to me, "Two years ago, two people came to our driving school, and they couldn't drive well, so we all told them to release the handbrake and Osa steer. I hope you don't become the next Japanese. “
However, a month later, why did everyone call me: "Cai Xia Lihe?" “
February** Dynamic Incentive Program
If you like it, pay attention....Pay attention!