I saw such a passage on the Internet: Most families in China are not worthy of having a full-time mother. The reason is simple: most men are unable to pay for the labor of stay-at-home mothers, so they are not eligible for the spiritual contribution that stay-at-home mothers bring to their families.
This passage is really cruel and realistic.
A fan once asked me: How do you balance family and work?
To be honest, it's really hard to balance.
My mother has been a housewife all her life, but when my second child was born, she confessed: Your life is over.
Indeed, I gave birth to two children in five years, a daughter and a son. The daughter was born in 2013 and the son was born in 2015. If it weren't for the repeated tossing and turning in the past few years, then my life might have fallen to the bottom.
Originally, I was a private school teacher, and although the work was hard, it was relatively stable.
After the birth of my child, I left a school. This resignation is not my own idea, but my husband's expectation, hoping that I can take care of the young children with my mother-in-law.
In the first year after giving birth, I was very uncomfortable, watching everyone else work normally, but I was feeding and changing diapers every day.
The following year, I started working part-time, working three hours a day in the afternoon at a host. Not much, but at least a little.
Another year passed, and I got pregnant unexpectedly, and my second child came. This time, I was busier, I gave up my part-time job and was a kid all day. The two children are two years apart, one is waiting to be fed, and the other is also the age of grinding.
After eight months of Erbao, I felt that my life was very depressing, and I began to write something on the Internet, at first it was just a hobby, writing essays. Later, I learned to write and began to contribute to various public accounts.
In 2017, the ** of the public account was okay, I could earn four or five thousand a month by writing, and six or seven thousand in good times. As my children grew up, in addition to writing, I also spent part of my time part-time doing part-time composition classes in custody and institutions, and I have been persevering.
It wasn't until 2019 that the mask problem broke out, and many platforms began to tighten their acceptance, and education and training were also affected. I started to give up on the post and toss my account. I have registered six platforms all over the network, not only to update articles every day, but also to update ** every day, and over the past few years, I have accumulated 600,000 fans, and my monetization ability has also increased a lot.
Sometimes I think about it, it's really incredible, everything is changing so fast, in the past, education and training was a relatively high part of my income, but now it only accounts for a small part. However, the income of the platform has increased many times and has become my main business.
Women will always have space outside the home, and exploring and learning new things will make them more confident and have a sense of control over their lives.
To be honest, my husband's own economic strength is okay, and if I don't toss, I can fully support our family's life. But for me, marriage and children are just part of my life experience, and I feel like I'm truly alive when I'm shining and heating up in the field I love.
In fact, in reality, women often need to put a lot of effort into finding a balance between career and family.
Whenever school is over, there is a woman selling desserts at the school gate. Her stuff is very clean and tastes good, and we'll have a good chat.
She said that her children study in this school, and her husband works in a factory and does not earn much, so she came out to set up a stall.
It's very hard to set up a stall, and you often rely on the weather to eat. When the weather is hot, standing on the road, after a while, I feel that I can scorch people; When the weather is cold, when I stand down for a few hours, my whole body is frozen and numb.
Moreover, she does not have her in-laws at home to help her, and it has become a big problem for her children to eat after school.
But I found that she persevered all the way. I see her almost every day. In the summer, she makes less desserts according to customer needs and tries to promote jelly. The jelly she makes is different from other people's, there are a variety of flavors, and customers can freely choose to add fruits. So, it looks very affordable.
In winter, she will sell hamburgers, hot milk treasures, and recently I see that students have more colds, and she has launched a new product of rock sugar stewed roasted pears.
In order to cook dinner for her children, she sometimes gives the stall to the stall owner next to her, lets the customers choose by themselves, and then scans the code to place an order.
Every time I see her greet her warmly in the cold wind, I firmly believe that her business will get better and better.
I don't know how much she can sell a day for such a small stall, but this kind of persistence and attempt makes me feel the tenacity of a woman who switches back and forth between career and family.
Yes, she has to deal with a lot of things, business is not good, she has to think about the needs of customers and innovate. The weather is hot or cold, and it takes perseverance to overcome. It's not a matter of ups and downs, but the need to deal with the trivialities and worries of every day.
But in the process of fighting monsters and upgrading, she also slowly accumulated experience and developed in a better direction.
Now that the economy is in a downturn, the unemployment rate is getting higher and higher. It's really hard to make a living just by relying on men to earn money. Stay-at-home mom, the road is dark and long.
If a woman has been a stay-at-home mother for a long time, in fact, a family's ability to resist risks will be relatively poor. So, whatever the reason, if you have any chance, don't give up the toss.
I am grateful to my past self, when my child was eight months old, I got up in the middle of the night to write. When the child is in kindergarten, he begins to make his own platform.
Yes, although the process was painful, but fortunately, I persevered. Rather than reaching out to my husband to ask for money, I prefer the sense of accomplishment of making money on my own. Because every penny of what I have earned is beautiful.