A guide to the Spring Festival hits
As an emotional writer, I'm often asked by readers:
In love, do we want to be emotional, or are we more rational? Can you restrain yourself from loving someone?
My opinion has always been:"Loving someone, the process of love and the beginning of love, we may be emotional and impulsive, but after love, we must rationally think about whether the person you love is worth it. Love is worth it or not, you also have to see what kind of person you love, if you know that he is unreliable, you still insist on going your own way, then you deserve no good results. Don't look for a boyfriend from the garbage, how many times have you asked me to say that. ”
Is it enough to love someone for a good marriage?
You don't love all the time, love is more often than you make up too many beautiful fantasies out of thin air.
Unreal. We have to look at the real things, and we have to see how likely you are to be happy in the relationship. No one wants to be with someone to jump into the fire pit, but don't wait until a few years later to regret swallowing the tears of grievance in your stomach, if it is really then, it will be really late.
In "Fireworks People", Li Yijin played by Ma Sichun seems to be a "love brain".
During the Chinese New Year, their families rushed back one by one to celebrate her grandmother's birthday, but she was not there. Li Yijin made a bold decision, she followed her boyfriend Zhou Dao home for the New Year. She and Zhou Zhi have been in love and living together for six years, and Zhou Zhi has never told her what her parents do.
Li Yijin was dead-eyed: If you don't tell me, I'll go to your house to see.
It's hard to come all the way here, and you have to be treated preferentially no matter what. But how did Zhou Daojia treat Li Yijin? The thoughtful grandmother forced Li Yijin to jump into the brazier to get bad luck because of their incompatibility, which was not enough, and forced her to drink chicken blood.
Li Yijin knew that she was humiliated, and it was Zhou Dao's family who gave her the power to dismount, but she still obeyed. This stems from the cowardice of her character in her bones。Since she was a child, her mother has treated her like this, and she has always tolerated it and did not dare to resist. Even if I was reluctant in my heart, I still endured it silently.
What left me speechless the most was the thoughtful attitude?
He protected Li Yijin on the surface, but in fact he didn't do anything, and let his grandmother come to him.
When eating Chinese New Year's Eve, it was quite harmonious at first, Li Yijin gave gifts to thoughtful grandfather, grandmother, and aunt with a "flattering" attitude, she just mentioned that there was a gift for thoughtful mother, and thoughtful grandfather scolded sharply:
"Who told you to mention this broom star, who gave you the guts? You, you're not welcome in this home! ”
Is this their Zhou family's hospitality?
Just because Li Yijin said the wrong word, he immediately swept her out of the house.
This hasn't entered the door yet, and if you get married, you may be bullied.
The thoughtful grandmother also pretended to have a heart ache and went to the hospital, but the thoughtful grandfather still scolded and scolded, "I think you are also a mourning star", Li Yijin stood there aggrieved, no one said a word for her, she only knew thoughtful, but thoughtful picked up her grandmother and left her away.
Li Yijin stood in the corner crying bitterly, while her family was eating Chinese New Year's Eve dinner and toasting in celebration.
It's already so obvious, do you still want to be obsessed?
No matter how good a thoughtful person is, his original family is a gap that the two of them can never cross, and the thoughtful grandparents are too traditional, strong, and unreasonable. Once Li Yijin and his family had a conflict, Zhou Zhi's first choice was his family.
Girls need to understand:When you meet a native family like Thoughtful, you have to stay away. We don't say that we hate the poor and love the rich, but we must have a minimum view of right and wrong, their family members should have due respect and hospitality for you, and the people you love should be able to protect you in times of contradictions and conflicts.
The first time she went back to her hometown with her boyfriend for the New Year, Li Yijin suffered inhuman treatment and was kicked out, she walked on the snowy streets with her suitcase, it was so dark, Zhou Zhi was not by her side, Li Yijin looked up at the fireworks in the sky, and her heart was cold.
The next day, she went home, and her mother didn't give her the care she deserved, and she said: I still know that this is your home.
Li Yijin was wronged outside and didn't dare to tell her mother, because she knew that it was useless and she would only be disliked by her mother.
Have you ever wondered what is the root of Li Yijin's "love brain"?
Actually, it was her mother. Li Yijin's personality is most like her mother, cowardly, forbearing, suffering injustice but still enduring, not knowing how to resist.
Sometimes I really feel very sad, the person we hate the most, but you will become him, because you are influenced by him everywhere, it is difficult to escape from his control of you, you are very painful, but you slowly become the person you hate the most.
Li Yijin's relationship with her mother is very suffocating, her mother loves her very much, but the way of love is too suffocating, so that Li Yijin just wants to escape. It's just a soup ball, and her mother can make things difficult and nag for her in every way. and Li Yijin's father, the first thing he said when he saw Li Yijin was: This time you and Zhou Yi went back to their hometown, what are the conditions of their family?
None of her parents really cared about her.
Faced with the suffocating parents, Li Yijin could only flee back to his small room.
She didn't stay at home long before she couldn't wait to return to Shanghai, which was a torturous "cage" for her.
She was so old that her mother would steal her bag, dig out the contraceptive pill and start questioning her, and even slapped her. Her mother forced her to go to the hospital, and said "If you are pregnant with the child you have Zhou, your life will be ruined, you are stupid". Li Yijin was very helpless, no matter what she said, her mother didn't trust her.
This is also the truth of why Li Yijin has not broken up with Zhou Dao for a long time, not because of her "love brain", but because she rebelled against her mother, she wants to take revenge on her mother in this way, the more her mother wants to control her, the more she doesn't want her to be with anyone, she has to.
So in a lot of the time,Parents also have to reflect on the way they get along with their children, do you really love and care about her? Have you ever wondered why she wants to fight against you just to escape from you? She may not love that person, but she just hit the south wall without hesitation to make her really escape from you.
Li Yijin has moved away after returning to Shanghai, and she is ready to let go of thoughtfulness, but her mother always mentions thoughtfulness in front of her, which also makes her miss thoughtfulness. She will care about whether she is doing well, and if she can't contact him, she will go to the rental house to find him and help him find a job.
Zhou Zhi knows Li Yijin very well, and he feels that every time Li Yijin mentions breaking up, it is just playing.
Thoughtful said a word to Li Yijin:You said you wanted to marry me, whether it was true or to run away from your mother
The thoughtful original family is very bad, but he is neither humble nor arrogant in the face of Li Yijin, because he knows that Li Yijin's original family is also very bad. The reason why he dared to take Li Yijin back and snub her so much was precisely because he knew Li Yijin and knew what kind of person she was.
Is this love? It's nothing but the selfishness and calculation of human nature.
Some girls are in love and are prone to recruit scumbags, in fact, she herself knows what the result will be, but her personality is like this, and it is difficult to change. It is precisely because she has never enjoyed real love in her original family that she can't let go of someone who gives her a little warmth. She can endure even more injustice and humiliation, because that's how she survived in her original family.
Children have the shadows of their parents hidden in their bodies.
Li Yijin's lack of confidence and masochism in the concept of marriage and love are also caused by her parents.
Her mother never gave her the respect and trust she deserved.
Why do some girls be confused when it comes to choosing who to marry?
Because she herself has never enjoyed real love, she has never seen a truly beautiful marriage, she wants to escape from her original family by marrying someone, but she just jumped into another fire pit.
What should we do?
You can't just escape, you have to learn to ** yourself, and you can't lower your requirements for marriage because of the harm you suffered in your original family. It is precisely because your original family is not so perfect that you have to choose your marriage partner well.
If it's a big deal, you won't get married.
If you really want to rebel and run away from your parents, you first have to learn to love yourself, instead of just running away and doing nothing, then aren't you still living in an inherent cage? What did you run away with?
end.