In 2021, in a village in Henan, 91-year-old Zhao Jinhua kept shouting in front of the gate for his son Zhou Jianbin to open the door. However, Zhou Jianbin closed the door and ignored it. Why is Zhou Jianbin so indifferent to the 91-year-old?
Old man Zhao Jinhua.
Zhao Jinhua has always hoped to return to her hometown to enjoy her old age. However,Zhou Jianbin did not welcome her return。What kind of complex relationship between mother and child is hidden behind this?
As Zhao Jinhua grew older, she began to feel lonely and helpless. She hopes to be able to return to her hometown to reunite with her son and let him provide for his old age. But Zhou Jianbin did not eliminate the pain and anger in his heart by returning to his mother. He can't forget the pain of the past, and he can't forgive his mother for hurting him.
Therefore, Zhou Jianbin chose to close the door and refused to meet his mother. He felt that he had paid enough to face the pain and hurt caused by his mother again. The fear and anger in his heart prevented him from forming an intimate relationship with his mother.
The son closed the door.
Zhao Jinhua's shouts attracted the attention of the onlookers, who expressed anger and accusations against Zhou Jianbin for his indifference。However, when they learn about the complex emotional entanglements between mother and son, they fall silent. They realize that this problem is not simply the opposition between unfilial piety and filial piety, but the contradictions and pains accumulated by a family for a long time. What caused the mother and son to turn against each other?
Zhao Jinhua, who is 91 years old, has raised a total of 7 childrenTwo of them, Zhou Jianbin and Zhou Jijun。Zhao Jinhua's hometown is in Xiaotun Village, Qi County, Henan Province, her third and fourth daughters settled in Qi County, while she and the rest of her children live in Taiyuan, Shanxi.
Zhao Jinhua has always wanted to return to her hometown to enjoy her old ageTherefore, she entrusted her two sons to renovate and rebuild the house in their hometown, hoping to return to their hometown and return to their roots。However,The eldest son, Zhou Jianbin, returned to the old house ahead of schedule to live, and no longer return to Taiyuan.
In 2021, Zhao Jinhua decided to return to Xiaotun Village, Qi County, to find her eldest son to care for the elderly, and her youngest son Zhou Jijun accompanied her back. However, they found that the door of the old house was closed and no one answered their knocks. Zhou Jijun tried to call ** to the eldest brother, but the eldest brother didn't answer. They turned to civil mediators for help, but even with the help of outsiders, they were not able to get in.
In desperation, Zhou Jijun took his mother to find the fourth sister. The fourth sister was surprised that Zhou Jijun didn't say hello before coming back, but she was not surprised by Zhou Jianbin's reaction. She saidZhou Jianbin and his mother have a long-standing grudge, but this problem should have been solved in Taiyuan, and it should not have been brought to my hometown.
Zhao Jinhua didn't want to live with her fourth daughter and insisted on going back to the old house. The group had to go back and knock on the door again, but still no one answered. At this time, some fellow villagers suggested that they go to find their third daughter, because she had a closer relationship with Zhou Jianbin .
Third daughter. Zhou Jijun took Zhao Jinhua and the mediator to find the third daughter's home, however, as soon as the third daughter heard that Zhao Jinhua was going back to live in the old house, her attitude towards Zhou Jijun became extremely excited, and she even turned around and locked the door.
The mediator began to suspect that things were not as simple as Zhou Jijun said, and that there must be something hidden behind Zhou Jianbin's refusal to let his mother enter the door. They contacted Zhou Jianbin and after many persuasions, Zhou Jianbin was finally willing to come out and make it clear.
The dispute between Zhao Jinhua and Zhou Jianbin turned out to be so complicated. Zhou Jianbin accused his mother of not having a word of truth in his mouth, and Zhao Jinhua said that she didn't know what she had done. The mediator realizes that this conflict can only be resolved if the root cause of the problem is found.
Zhou Jianbin . After the efforts of the mediator, they returned to the old house again and finally met Zhao Jinhua's eldest son, Zhou Jianbin . However, Zhou Jianbin was unusually indifferent to his mother's call.
The mediator led the group to Zhou Jianbin doorstep. They hoped to resolve the conflict within the Zhou family, but they were unexpectedly refused. Zhou Jianbin faced everyone indifferentlyExpelled them mercilessly: "Let you live in?" I'm sorry for my daughter-in-law's spirit in heaven! You don't want to enter this door! ”
Mother and son quarrel with each other.
This scene confused everyoneThey don't understand why this old lady turned out to be a murderer。Zhou Jianbin finally couldn't suppress the secret in his heart, and he decided to confess it to everyone. It turned out that Zhou Jianbin's mother Zhao Jinhua had always been prejudiced against him and always disliked and dissatisfied with his eldest son.
Zhou Jianbin has never been favored in the eyes of his mother, and his wife has also been picked on and slandered by his mother in every way. Although Zhou Jianbin 's wife is hardworking, kind, and filial to her family, Zhao Jinhua unabashedly shows disgust and dislike for her。She spread rumors everywhere, ruined her daughter-in-law's reputation, and made her daughter-in-law feel wronged in the family.
The son had tears in his eyes.
The daughter-in-law suffers humiliation every day, and Zhou Jianbin knows it. He was originally a little resentful of his mother Zhao Jinhua, but Zhao Jinhua's actions made his heart more and more cold. Zhao Jinhua was not only eccentric, but also deliberately caused trouble for her daughter-in-law during the confinement period and did not let her rest well. Not only did she not help take care of the children, but she also spoke harshly to her daughter-in-law, which made her suffer a lot
Under the restrictions of the family planning policy, Zhou Jianbin and his wife could not have another child to change the situation. Over the years, they have endured silently under the oppression of Zhao Jinhua, and they have been pressed on the heads of their younger brothers' families everywhere. Although their hearts were full of grievances, they still maintained respect and filial piety to Zhao Jinhua.
However, the trick of fate made Zhou Jianbin fall into deep self-blame and guilt again. His wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. Zhou Jianbin was shocked, and he felt that he was carrying a heavy burden of sin. Because his wife and he have endured all kinds of grievances and pressures, long-term bad emotions have led to hormonal imbalances in the bodyAnger and depression are often triggers for breast cancer。In Zhou Jianbin view,The tragic fate of his wife was because she married him, because she endured all this with him
Regret. Faced with the high cost of chemotherapy for his wife's breast cancer, Zhou Jianbin fell into financial difficulties. He had no choice but to ask his mother Zhao Jinhua for help, hoping to mortgage two properties in Taiyuan to help him get a loan. However, Zhao Jinhua rejected his request, claiming that his property would not be given to someone with a foreign surname. Not only that, Zhao Jinhua also spread rumors everywhere, slandering the reputation of her eldest son and daughter-in-law, claiming that they had been coveting her real estate.
The news soon reached the ears of the eldest daughter-in-law, who was so hurt that she spent her days in tears that her condition deteriorated. Zhou Jianbin was very angry that his wife had to endure not only the torture of illness, but also the psychological pressure.
Tell the grievances in your heart.
However, what made Zhou Jianbin even more angry was that his mother transferred all the real estate in her name to her youngest son and daughter-in-law. Zhao Jinhua explained: "Sooner or later, the girl belongs to someone else's family and has no inheritance rights. ”All this was unacceptable to Zhou Jianbin , and he barely closed his eyes for three days. In the end, he returned to his hometown in Qi County with his wife and daughter.
This house was built by Zhou Jianbin and his younger brother Zhou Jijun together, originally so that his mother could move over to support the elderly in her old age. However, his wife died in this house。The death of his wife became the pain of Zhou Jianbin in his life, and it was also the reason why he could not forgive his mother.
Aggrieved and heartbroken.
After learning of the situation, the mediator tried to communicate with Zhao Jinhua, but Zhao Jinhua insisted on denying what she had done. Through the understanding of the neighbors, the mediator learned the truth and confirmed that everything Zhou Jianbin said was true. Zhao Jinhua has always been very serious about patriarchyAnd Zhou Jianbin 's wife has always respected Zhao Jinhua very much, but Zhao Jinhua has never respected Zhou Jianbin 's wife.
The reason why Zhou Jianbin has not allowed his mother to enter the door is because he feels ashamed of his wife. He was well aware of what his mother was doing to his wife, but there was nothing he could do. As a son, he felt very embarrassed to be caught in the middle. He regretted it all the time, if he had been more resolute at the beginning, if he had taken his wife directly out of the suffocating home, maybe his wife would still be alive and well. However, it is already too late.
Calm down and communicate patiently.
As a soft-hearted person, Zhou Jianbin finally decided to continue to support his mother with the help of a mediator. However, the decision sparked heated controversy online, with many netizens questioning the mediator's impartiality. They think why only the eldest son is forced to support his motherDoesn't the younger son have the same responsibility? Why put all the burden on the eldest son? In addition,The mother gave both properties to the younger son, so isn't it natural for the younger son to support his mother? In this case, why mediate? Shouldn't it be to mediate the younger son's maintenance obligations?
The old man eventually had something to rely on.
It is believed that the responsibility for maintenance in the family should not be borne by just one child, but should be shared by the family members. When dealing with family disputes, the role of the mediator is to help the parties reach a compromise and understanding, not to bully honest and well-meaning people. Ultimately, family members need to work together to resolve the issue in an attitude of reconciliation and understanding, so that the love and affection between family members can continue to be passed on. (*From the Internet, infringement contact deleted).