Blood or husband and wife, who is closer?
Family is the cornerstone of society, and family harmony is the foundation for building a harmonious society. Kinship and marriage form the skeleton of the family. However, since then, people often compare these two relationships, and some people think that parents and children cannot accompany them until old age, and only the wife is the eternal companion; Some people believe that blood ties are eternal, and once a marriage relationship breaks down, it is like a stranger.
In reality, many family conflicts are often caused by improper handling of the relationship between the original blood family and the small family of husband and wife.
How to deal with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? Don't ask"Who matters between me and your mother"Don't complain"married a daughter-in-law and forgot her mother"。Blood ties and marriage relationships are not incompatible, but require understanding and respect from both parties.
Both the relationship between husband and wife and the relationship of blood have their importance and cannot be generalized. In a marital relationship, both parties jointly own property, but when dealing with property issues, their sharing and independence need to be taken into account.
When it comes to blood relations, we can choose to support and help each other to make the family relationship deeper.
The Tang Dynasty poetess Li Ye used a poem to express the unique appearance of the relationship between husband and wife: the closest and farthest, the deepest and the shallow, all lie in the closest and most distant couples in the world.
They are intimate, as bright as the sun and the moon, but they are also distant and indifferent, as deep and unfathomable as a clear stream. This is how husband and wife are both the closest partners and the most distant strangers.
The relationships between people are ever-changing, but there are some ties that cannot be chosen, and that is blood relations. Parents, children, brothers and sisters, these relationships are innate and irreplaceable.
At the same time, the relationship between husband and wife is a choice, and we are looking for that unique soul mate among thousands of people. Whether we choose it or not, we should cherish the people around us, because these are the most important beings in life.
In the vast sea of people, where is the soul mate we are looking for? Theoretically, he could be any person in real life. There is an old saying, "A hundred years of cultivation can be crossed in the same boat, and a thousand years of cultivation can be slept together" - two people become husband and wife, this is indeed a kind of fate.
The global population now exceeds 7.5 billion, and each of us encounters an average of about 29.2 million people in our lifetime. The probability of two strangers meeting in this vast sea of people is 5 in 10 million, and the probability of knowing each other after meeting is 3 in 1 billion, and the probability of finally falling in love is even more minimal, only 0000049%。
In the relationship between husband and wife, we have experienced the firmness of the alliance, the attachment of each other, and the lingering of sharing the same bed. But when the reason for separation appeared, the former affection seemed to disappear in an instant.
As a result, people often quote "husband and wife are originally birds of the same forest, and when the disaster comes, they fly separately" to describe this situation. It's true that some couples turn against each other and fly away, but how many want their marriage to be like this?
Perhaps, we can think about it from another angle: it is precisely because the marriage relationship is not as innate and unique as the blood relationship, so we need to spend more time and energy to operate.
Some people say that parents can't accompany us all our lives, children will have their own lives when they grow up, and siblings will go their separate ways after they split up, so in the end, only husband and wife can become old partners.
Of course, this is a correct point, but only if you and your spouse are able to grow old together. If the husband and wife cannot grow old, then their relationship becomes like strangers.
Blood ties are inseparable, but marital ties are fragile, and only two factors can maintain them: the affection between husband and wife and the legal rights and obligations.
When the affection in the marriage disappears, the marital relationship becomes a contractual relationship.
The difference between getting married and entering into a business contract is that in a marital relationship, we invest in emotions, and in a business contract, we invest money. So, if this kind of marriage relationship is not based on emotion, what is the difference between it and a business contract?
At this time, the marriage relationship is actually quite precarious, because the certificate that maintains the relationship can be replaced by another certificate at any time. As a marital relationship takes shape, the passionate passion of love usually fades.
At this time, the husband and wife need to establish a relationship of mutual dependence in the long-term life together. When the passion is gone and the family relationship is not yet solid, it is the time when the marriage relationship is at its most vulnerable.
Blood ties and marital ties are not mutually exclusive, but are two essential components of a family. Family harmony can only be maintained when these two relationships are in harmony with each other.
The Chinese worldview is not a black-and-white dualism, but believes that the world is made up of two elements that harmonize yin and yang. This is a naïve materialist dialectical way of thinking that originated from the ancients.
When we were not married, we had a deep blood relationship with our parents, brothers and sisters; After starting a family, the relationship between husband and wife and blood relationship have become our closest interpersonal relationships.
1.If you believe that blood is more important than marriage, then please consider how our blood relationship can continue without the bridge of marriage.
If you think that marriage is more important than blood, then think about it, if it were not your parents and the parents of your spouse, how could you have you? Obviously, it is impossible to maintain the harmony of a family by taking sides of the road.
Blood ties are inseparable, and in contrast, marriage seems to be more volatile than others, but we all hope to have a rock-solid marriage, which requires the formation of an eternally connected community of destiny between husband and wife.
2.If you think that blood ties are better than marriages, then think about it, how can our blood ties survive without marriage as a bridge?
If you think that marriage is better than blood, then think about where you and your spouse come from if it is not your parents and the parents of your spouse? Obviously, it is impossible to maintain the harmony of a family by taking sides of the road.
Blood ties are inseparable, and in contrast, marriage seems to be more volatile than others, but we all hope to have a rock-solid marriage, which requires the formation of an eternally connected community of destiny between husband and wife.
3.If you think that blood ties are more important than marriages, then think about how our blood ties can be passed on without the bond of marriage.
If you think that marriage is more important than blood ties, then think about where you came from if it wasn't your parents and your spouse's parents? Obviously, it is impossible to maintain the harmony of a family by favoring only one side.
Blood relations can never be separated, in contrast, marriage relations seem to be not so strong, but we are afraid that we all hope that our marriage can be more solid, which requires the formation of a community of destiny between husband and wife that is closely linked for a lifetime.
In the Chinese yin and yang harmony and dialectical thinking, it is difficult to make a simple comparison between blood love and husband and wife love. These two emotions give us different meanings in life: our lives are given by our parents, and then we have the possibility to spend the rest of our lives hand in hand with our significant other.
In turn, it is the marriage of our parents that makes our lives possible, and the blood of our next generation is also continued through marriage. Therefore, blood ties and marital ties actually complement each other.
Why should we pit two indispensable relationships against each other? Many families are at odds because they are torn between blood and marital ties, and only those who know how to manage the two relationships in harmony can maintain warmth and harmony.
Our parents give us life, but it is not our parents who accompany us at the end of our lives; Children grow up with laughter and troubles, but children will have their own families and careers to focus on when they grow up.
Blood ties are the starting point of our lives, and elderly partners are companions at the end of life.