Filial piety to parents is a traditional virtue of the Chinese nation, and it is also the obligation of every child. However, in reality, not everyone can do it. During the Chinese New Year, I visited some relatives and met many elderly people in their seventies, and found that not all of them can be honored by their children, and some are even unwilling to support their parents.
By carefully observing and listening to my children, I understand some of the reasons. The vast majority of children who are unwilling to support the elderly are not unfilial, but because they cannot meet the requirements of the elderly.
For example, this happened to my friend. During the Spring Festival, the family drove hundreds of kilometers back to his wife's maiden home, only to find that his father-in-law was sick. Although it was just a common cold, the old man was reluctant to go to the hospital and insisted on his **, which led to the aggravation of his condition. In the end, after some persuasion, the old man went to the clinic and found out that it was a flu, and he got it in time.
When it comes to supporting their parents, all children can give is money, food, drink, and food. But the elderly often hope that their children can give more, including the authority and dignity of the feudal family, and even hope that their children can live and act according to their wishes. This expectation is often beyond the child's ability, leading to conflict and friction.
Therefore, we should not just blame our unfilial children, but understand their situation better. In modern society, children bear great pressure and responsibility, and many times they are unable to meet the requirements of the elderly. Therefore, we should look at this problem more rationally, and instead of blindly blaming our children, we should look for ways to solve the problem and make the responsibility of supporting parents more reasonable and feasible.
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Filial piety and supporting parents are the traditional virtues of the Chinese nation, and it is also the obligation of every child. However, after walking around relatives and meeting many elderly people over 70 years old during the Spring Festival, I found that not everyone in life will honor their parents, and even some people are unwilling to support their parents. After careful observation and listening to the children's complaints, I finally understood that these children who are unwilling to support the elderly are definitely not unfilial, but the support that the elderly want, and the children really can't afford it. This is definitely not an excuse for children who are not filial to their parents, and after reading my friend's experience, you will understand why I say this. Here's the thing, when I returned to my parents' house on the second day of the Lunar New Year, my friend took his wife and children and drove hundreds of kilometers back to his daughter-in-law's mother's house. The temperature of the Spring Festival in the northern Henan Plain is very high in the past few days, according to the old man himself, he went to the meeting the day before, it was hot, he took off his cotton clothes, "sweated", and never thought that he would have a fever the next day. It stands to reason that if you have a fever, you should go to see it, and it is not a big deal. But the old man just didn't listen, saying that he didn't want to see a doctor during the Spring Festival, saying that it was a common cold, not a big deal, and he didn't even take cold medicine. It's nothing, if you don't eat it, you won't eat it, maybe you can carry it and it will pass. But my friend's daughter-in-law couldn't stand it anymore, so she persuaded the old man to drink more hot water. It doesn't matter what he said, the old man suddenly became angry, saying that if he drinks water, he knows that he drinks water, and this fever is because he drinks water, and he also says that if he doesn't drink water, his metabolism will be less, and the fever will go away quickly. I don't know where the old man's crooked reasoning was learned, my friend's daughter-in-law was stunned, and she opened her mouth to say something, but she didn't know what to say. Sure enough, the old man's throat was extremely painful that night, and it was uncomfortable to swallow, but the old man still refused to go to the hospital to see, or that theory. After nearly an hour of persuasion by the family, the old man was willing to go to the clinic. The doctor took a brief look at it and said it was "A flu", and gave him some medicine and let him go back. When my friend saw that it was not like that, the doctor in this clinic was a little coping, so he suggested going to the hospital to take blood for testing. As soon as he finished speaking, he was scolded back by his father-in-law, saying that he was not a doctor, what did he care, and he was not going to die, so why was he drawing blood. My friend was speechless, so he had to choose to shut up and drive his car silently. Not surprisingly, the medicine was also drunk, but it didn't seem to have any effect, and the old man's throat was still extremely uncomfortable, and he didn't even sleep much all night. Early in the morning, the old man kept coughing and getting heavier and heavier, and there was a feeling of not being able to breathe. The family was very nervous, but the old man just refused to go to the hospital and asked someone to do a "scraping" on his throat. My friend's mother-in-law made a round of ** and finally found one in the village who could scrape. But when people saw the old man's situation, they directly suggested going to the hospital. Okay, the old man is not strong now, and obediently goes to the hospital. After a check, it was indeed "A flu", and the injection and infusion took the medicine. On the night of the third day of junior high school, it was much better. The family finally stopped for a while. On the morning of the fourth day of the new year, a friend took his wife and children to prepare for the return trip, but the old man was not happy, saying that he was sick and that you would ......not even stay at home for a few more daysBaba said a lot, in short, it is unfilial piety, it is a great rebellion. My friend's daughter-in-law is also very aggrieved, the vacation is already short, there are still many things to do, and time does not allow; Second, the elderly don't wear masks at home, and their children are still young, so they are afraid of being infected. My friend told me what happened to me and was very helpless, saying that if it wasn't for his daughter-in-law, he would not want to go at all. After all, the two friends are also well-known for their filial piety, and the money and things that should be honored to their parents have never been less. That's it, the old man is still not satisfied with his husband and wife. In fact, in terms of supporting their parents, all children can give is money and things, good food and drink, and plenty of food and clothing. And the old people want not only to be fed and clothed, they also want to be the big family in feudal society, to be the master of the house, have absolute authority, and even want to use their limited cognition to command, supervise, and educate their children. Therefore, what the old man wants is not only support, but to repay his gratitude, which is a "Nezha cut the flesh and returned the mother to the bones and the father" style of gratitude. Since it is to repay the favor, it is not only enough to eat and drink, but also to provide enough emotional value. For example, the elderly can be unhappy anytime and anywhere, but the children cannot, the children must cheer up, accompany the careful, coax from time to time, just like parents coax children, and take a candy if necessary, give some sweetness. The elderly can put forward their needs at any time, and the children must respond with the changes of three heads and six arms and the seventy-two changes of the grandson monkey to meet their needs, otherwise it is "the child is big, the wings are stiff, and he can no longer command and move". The old man can change the hexagram and change the order day and night, but the children must be loyal to them like loyal to the emperor, and be absolutely obedient, on call for every instruction or request, willing to do so, without discounting the implementation, if necessary, also need to report in time for instructions, and then listen to the opinions of the elderly. Otherwise, "I eat more salt than you've walked!" Who are you going to show your face? Don't you recognize me as a father or mother! Of course, if the parents in the family are reasonable, the family will be very harmonious and the children will live more comfortably. Many old people stubbornly believe that raising children is an investment, and now that they are old, it is time for the child to give back, but they don't know that the children have children's difficulties, and they can only give these.