Word count: 1854 words.
Reading time: about 5 minutes.
Article author: Nina
[Recent developments].
Recently, readDr. Hailan's "Imperfect, Beautiful".There are many points in the book that have touched me, and I will share them with you in different topics
Sharing theme: "Early love" = "early practice" is a very important self-experience in growing up.
In the book, Dr. Hailan shares: ".Early love should be equal to early practice, that is, early practice on how to play various roles in life.
Puppy love should not be an avoidance or avoidance problem, but should be a very important self-experience in the process of growing upLearn how to get along with people and know how to take responsibility.
The topic of early love should be considered a relatively "sensitive" topic when I was a student.
When I was in middle school, whenever the teachers noticed that the students were a little "ambiguous", they would immediately notify the parents. On the one hand, there may be concerns that students' academic and academic performance will be affected by romantic relationships, and on the other hand, overly intimate behavior on campus can also lead to bad effects.
At that time, it seemed that only teachers and parents could "jointly stop" "love" in the "embryonic stage".
In one of our Chinese lessons, our Chinese teacher assigned an essay topic:What do you think about the issue of puppy love.
I think that the teacher's intention in assigning this topic at that time was to make us realize the "bad consequences" brought about by love.
Sure enough, in our class, all the students wrote "the answer the teacher wants", and named "puppy love" a series of "crimes". Except for me.
I didn't vote against "puppy love". So at that time, I became an "alternative person".
My idea is not to absolutely support or oppose it, but to think that the title itself defines "puppy love" as a "problem", and in my opinion, it is a problem.
Because,There are two sides to everything. Marx's philosophy also tells us:It is necessary to analyze specific problems in detail, and it is not possible to generalize.
And I don't have any objections, more importantly,I don't think "puppy love" is a direct cause of declining grades or affecting relationships.
In the TV series "Fireworks People", the mother of the "second child" said something that I agree with very much when she faced the teacher questioning her daughter's "early love":I believe that my daughter is capable enough to judge her own actions.
"Puppy love" is not a topic that you have to "jump away", once you encounter it,I think it's more important to identify with this emotion, accept yourself, and think concretely about what you want to do next.
You know, it is not a shame to appreciate others and like others, but something to be proud of.
This is a sincere expression of human emotions from the heartWhileWe need to understandIt is the judgment of "like" and the control of one's own behavior.
But at that time, I believe that none of the teachers would agree with my "forward-looking" awareness and ideas. Therefore, my essays are also rated as "alternative articles".
It is very gratifying that at that time, we had a pair of senior brothers and sisters in our senior year of high school, who were still firmly together despite the "opposition around us". One of them is the president of the student union and the other is the head of the cultural and recreation department, and they not only have excellent academic performance, but are also very active in all aspects of culture, sports and art. In the college entrance examination, one of them was admitted to Fudan University and the other was admitted to Zhejiang University.
They are inseparable in the school, and they can be seen in professional classrooms, libraries, and canteens.
They are more about mutual fulfillment than the negative effects that everyone thinks.
After graduating from college, I worked for a few years, and I saw them posting marriage information on Weibo, which immediately caused a sensation among the alumni of the school. We all sighed: how many 10 years can we meet, know and love each other like them.
This is a touch that comes from appreciating and cherishing each other.
I still hold on to my old views"Puppy love" is just to recognize what liking is, what kind of relationship I should maintain with others, and what kind of responsibilities I should fulfill in this relationship before anyone else.
This is not an escape, let alone a denial.
Therefore, I am also very pleased that my brother was very willing to share with me the "little interesting things" at school when he was in middle school: "Today I received a confession letter from my classmates" and "I like her so much" ......
Maybe the children are still ignorant of love, but whenever I share these "little interesting things", I can see the light in the children's eyes. Others appreciate him, and he also admires others, this unique light.
This is the beginning of how we learn to "love ourselves and love others".
When you meet "puppy love", don't run away and avoid, cherish the touching it brings you:
1.[Do not avoid, do not exclude]:When a child encounters "puppy love", we should not subconsciously have the "authority" of parents to judge that this is a "wrong thing". Instead, we should lead the children to sort out their own emotions and judge the authenticity of their emotions. More importantly, let your child see the sparkle in himself and the sparkle in others. Learning to appreciate and identify with each other is an important step in teaching children to "treat likes correctly".
2.[No denial, no blame]:Love is a beautiful thing, and you can't deny or disagree with its existence just because it appeared "a little earlier". Rather, it is necessary for children to find their own mentality and position in the "complex" emotions, stabilize their thoughts and emotions, and know how to do something, not to do something, and to be responsible and responsible.
3.[Love yourself, love others]:"Early Love" = "Early Practice", practice how to love yourself and others. If you know how to love yourself, you will know how to love others. "Early love" is a rare and precious learning opportunity, and it may turn out that not everyone can have an enviable "10 years", but we certainly will not regret it, because we have loved and loved deeply, which is a kind of growth.
Have you or your children ever had a "puppy love"? Let's talk about how to learn to accept yourself, accept emotions, learn to love yourself and love others